The Most Awful Films I've Ever Seen (in my opinion)
These are films that I really think are god-awful. If you don't agree, that's your opinion and you're welcome to it. We'll just have to agree to disagree.
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- DirectorJon M. ChuStarsAubrey SheaStefanie ScottAurora PerrineauAs a small-town girl catapults from underground video sensation to global superstar, she and her three sisters begin a journey of discovering that some talents are too special to keep hidden.This was the single most offensive POS I've ever seen! This was NOT Jem in any way, shape or form! Everything about it was painfully, wretchedly, horribly bad! It's like the filmmakers didn't care in the least! >:(
- DirectorM. Night ShyamalanStarsPaul GiamattiBryce Dallas HowardJeffrey WrightApartment building superintendent Cleveland Heep rescues what he thinks is a young woman from the pool he maintains. When he discovers that she is actually a character from a bedtime story who is trying to make the journey back to her home, he works with his tenants to protect his new friend from the creatures that are determined to keep her in our world.The plot of this film was so contrived, it was laughable. Cheesy dialog, situations so far-fetched it was painful and the whole movie overall was completely self-indulgent. I have a whole in depth review on this if you want to read it.
- DirectorPeggy HolmesJavier AbadStarsEva NoblezadaSimon PeggJane FondaThe curtain is pulled back on the millennia-old battle between the organizations of good luck and bad luck that secretly affects everyday lives.Do NOT let this Pixar/Dreamworks wannabe fool you. This has to be one of the most boring, uninteresting animated films I've ever seen. The plot was so hollow and the characters were unremarkable and forgettable.
- DirectorMark A.Z. DippéStarsMichael Jai WhiteJohn LeguizamoMartin SheenAn elite mercenary is killed, but comes back from Hell as a reluctant soldier of the Devil.Horribly rushed plot, terrible special effects and clueless filmmakers trying to make an R rated graphic novel into a PG13 film for younger audiences. These two things don't mix and the film suffered for it.
- DirectorMichael BayStarsShia LaBeoufMegan FoxJosh DuhamelSam Witwicky leaves the Autobots behind for a normal life. But when his mind is filled with cryptic symbols, the Decepticons target him and he is dragged back into the Transformers' war.Just a huge forgettable mess of a movie with too much action and little to no plot anywhere. Very disappointingly underwhelming. :(
- DirectorSamuel BayerStarsJackie Earle HaleyRooney MaraKyle GallnerThe spectre of a disfigured man haunts the children of the parents who murdered him, stalking and killing them in their dreams.Why in God's name was this movie made? I love Jackie Earle Haley, but unfortunately, he's no Robert Englund. This role is too iconic and the filmmakers made the mistake of trying to make the nightmares realistic and that's not how dreams work. They are suppose to be off kilter and surreal. That's the point and it totally went over their heads.
Plus, the other mistake the filmmakers made was to start the film when the trouble was already happening and not giving the audience a chance to get to know the characters and sympathize with them. - DirectorChris MillerRaman HuiStarsMike MyersCameron DiazEddie MurphyReluctantly designated as the heir to the land of Far, Far Away, Shrek hatches a plan to install the rebellious Artie as the new king while Princess Fiona tries to fend off a coup d'état by the jilted Prince Charming.This film was a blight on the entire Shrek franchise. Just a badly acted, badly written, forgettable mess of a movie. The new characters were just bland and useless and so was the story. :P
- DirectorRyan MurphyStarsJulia RobertsJavier BardemRichard JenkinsA married woman realizes how unhappy her marriage really is, and that her life needs to go in a different direction. After a painful divorce, she takes off on a round-the-world journey to "find herself".This movie would have been great if I could have sympathized with Liz Gilbert. To me, she came off as a very whiny, self-centered, shallow complainer. I loved the overall trip(Italy, India and Bali were visually stunning), but I wish it were all happening to someone more deserving of this beauty and of the audience's sympathy.
- DirectorPeter WebberStarsGaspard UllielRhys IfansGong LiAfter the death of his parents during World War II, young Hannibal Lecter moves in with his beautiful aunt and begins plotting revenge on the barbarians responsible for his sister's death.This film left me with more questions than answers. This was suppose to be the prequel that was going to explain how Hannibal Lecter became a cold, caluculating psychopath. All we got was a story that was obviously phoned in by the author with no real direction or even a valid point. What was the deal with his Japanese aunt? How does any of that contribute to how he became the monster he is today? None of the dots the movie presented connected and it just left me scratching my head. :P
- DirectorNikolaj ArcelStarsIdris ElbaMatthew McConaugheyTom TaylorA boy haunted by visions of a dark tower from a parallel reality teams up with the tower's disillusioned guardian to stop an evil warlock known as the Man in Black who plans to use the boy to destroy the tower and open the gates of Hell.As a huge fan of "The Dark Tower" book series, I couldn't believe just how badly this movie turned out. I don't blame Idris Elba or Matthew McConaughey for the movie's awfulness because they did their best with the material they were given. I put the blame squarely on the shoulders of whoever wrote the script.
Anyone who has read the 8 book series knows that this epic Arthurian tale of gunslingers, magic, and a wasteland in a fantasy world could never be contained in a 2-hour movie. Why did they think they could do the story any justice? :/ - DirectorAna ClavellJames Glenn DudelsonStarsStephanie PetteeRoy AbramsohnSusan SchrammThis second sequel to Creepshow (1982) features five new tales of horror: "Alice", "The Radio", "Call Girl", "The Professor's Wife", and "Haunted Dog".Whomever made this awful crapfest needs to be beaten within an inch of their lives! Ridiculously unscary stories laden with the most primitive and amateurish special effects I've ever seen. There are no words for how bad this was! >:(
- DirectorBo WelchStarsMike MyersSpencer BreslinDakota FanningTwo bored children have their lives turned upside down when a talking cat comes to visit them.Bland, silly and frankly embarrassing. The movie had none of the warmth or whimsy of the book and the adult humor was just completely out of place.
- DirectorChris AngelStarsGordon CurrieStacy GrantPhillip Rhys ChaudharyIt's death-by-fear (aka scared-to-death) in this deceptively psychological thriller. The hero, Mike brings his friends to his grandparents' house for a Halloween party wherein they will all dress up as their innermost fears. Mike's fear is that he's inherited a homicidal legacy from his father. Mike's father was a serial killer who murdered his mother right in front of him when Mike was five before committing suicide. Mike's fear manifests itself in his inability to commit to his girlfriend of 4 1/2 years, Peg for fear that he will kill her too. Everything gets rolling when an ancient Indian totem wooden figure named Morty comes to life and starts killing off Mike's friends by making their worst fears come true. The ultimate confrontation comes when Mike has to face his greatest fear - his own father.An unscary muddled mess of a film that looked like the filmmakers were making it up as they were going along.
- DirectorRobert ZemeckisStarsJoseph Gordon-LevittTom HanksBenjamin Evan AinsworthA puppet is brought to life by a fairy, who assigns him to lead a virtuous life in order to become a real boy.What can I say about this disaster that hasn't been said already. Just convoluted and overly sanitized for no good reason and as much as I love Tom Hanks, he was completely wrong for the role of Geppetto. Plus, what was with that claptrap of an ambiguous ending of not knowing whether or not Pinocchio becomes a real boy or not? Isn't that suppose to be the whole point of the journey?
- DirectorD.J. CarusoStarsKate BeckinsaleMel RaidoDuncan JoinerA mother and her young son release unimaginable horrors from the attic of their rural dream home.If you looked up the word "pointless" in the dictionary, this movie would be listed next to it. What in God's name was the point of this movie? No sympathetic characters, random guy shows up then disappears without warning or explanation and no satisfying conclusion for why all of this is happening.
- DirectorDavid S. GoyerStarsJustin ChatwinMargarita LevievaMarcia Gay HardenA teenager is left invisible to the living after an attack.I usually don't have a problem with suspension of disbelief, but with this film, I was having it big time. It's hard to sympathize and root for a guy who falls in love with the woman who tried to kill him. I don't care how pretty she looks with her hair down.
- DirectorBetty ThomasStarsJason LeeZachary LeviDavid CrossThe world-famous singing preteen chipmunk trio return to contend with the pressures of school, celebrity, and a rival female music group known as The Chipettes.Worst than the first one. Way worse!
- DirectorStephen SommersStarsHugh JackmanKate BeckinsaleRichard RoxburghThe famed monster hunter is sent to Transylvania to stop Count Dracula, who is using Dr. Frankenstein's research and a werewolf for nefarious purposes.Normally, I love anything Hugh Jackman does, but I just couldn't get behind this one. Bad plot, bad acting, a villain who was not scary in the least and his wives were beyond annoying.
- DirectorTim BurtonStarsMia WasikowskaJohnny DeppHelena Bonham CarterNineteen-year-old Alice returns to the magical world from her childhood adventure, where she reunites with her old friends and learns of her true destiny: to end the Red Queen's reign of terror.One word... Futterwacken! *roll eyes* What in God's name was Tim Burton thinking?! O.o
- DirectorClare KilnerStarsDermot MulroneyDebra MessingJack DavenportSingle-girl anxiety causes Kat Ellis to hire a male escort to pose as her boyfriend at her sister's wedding. Her plan, an attempt to dupe her ex-fiancé, who dumped her a couple years prior, proves to be her undoing.Ill conceived and rushed plot, lead characters have no chemistry and the English/American flip flopping became confusing. Bad rom-com.
- DirectorWayne BlairStarsAbigail BreslinColt PrattesSarah HylandA musical re-imagining of the 1987 film, Dirty Dancing (1987).WTF were they thinking?! This was painfully, wretchedly, horribly bad! The movie was badly cast and Abigail Bresin is no Jennifer Grey and Colt Prattes can't hold a candle to Patrick Swayze in sex appeal or danceability. I won't fat-shame Breslin, but unfortunately, it was kind of a factor for the poor performance. I'm puzzled why Sarah Hyland was cast as Lisa when she would have made a better Baby in my opinion. And why was there such an effort to showcase the troubles in Baby's parents' marriage? Who cares about that? The movie is not about them! Colt and Abigail have no chemistry between them and the dancing is awkward. Why was this made?! >:(
- DirectorTyler PerryStarsTamela J. MannAngela BassettTyler PerryA single mom takes her family to Georgia for the funeral of her father--a man she never met--and she and her clan meet the crass, fun-loving Brown family.Tyler Perry's movies are usually on the mediocre side, but I can still usually find something I like about them, but not this one. Leads have no chemistry, Rick Fox can't act his way out of a paper bag, the juxtaposition between the comedy and drama were horribly unbalanced and those were the least of the film's problems. Just awful all around.
- DirectorDarren Lynn BousmanStarsJessica LowndesJoe AndersonLin ShayeAn investigative reporter teams up with a police officer to solve the mystery of why a seemingly good man murdered her sister's family.This movie had an interesting premise, but it just fell apart completely. I couldn't root for the protagonist because she was just insufferable and the overall plot was just a mess.
- DirectorJennifer FlackettMark LevinStarsJodie FosterGerard ButlerAbigail BreslinImagination and reality collide when young Nim's father goes missing at sea. Fate brings to her the author of the Alex Rover series, her favorite books, and together they try to find Nim's father.Not a very entertaining family movie. Little action, comedy or warmth since none of the characters are actually interacting with one another until the very end of the film. I was kind of expecting Jodie Foster's character to take care of the girl until her father came back. Alas, that's not what happened and that was disappointing to me.
- DirectorSpike JonzeStarsMax RecordsCatherine O'HaraForest WhitakerYearning for escape and adventure, a young boy runs away from home and sails to an island filled with creatures that take him in as their king.I really wanted to like this, but I thought it was just long, drawn out and boring.
- DirectorVíctor GarciaStarsAmanda RighettiCerina VincentErik PalladinoSeveral years after Sara and Eddie escaped the former asylum and its inmates, Ariel, Sara's sister, visits the house looking for answers and the truth behind her sister's insane claims about what happened inside it.Avoid this at all cost! The film not being scary is this least of its problems. Bad acting, horrible plot, and characters I couldn't sympathize with.
- DirectorRoland EmmerichStarsJoshua MorrellEva KryllTammy ShieldsBelieving to be able to communicate with his deceased father, a young boy develops psychic powers where he uses them to try to stop supernatural forces threatening his family and friends, especially a possessed ventriloquist dummy.Also known by the alternate title "Joey", this mishmash of ideas taken from more successful fantasy movies, i.e. "The Goonies", "E.T.: The Extra Terrestrial", "The Monster Squad", "Poltergeist", was put in a metaphorical blender only to spew out this mess of a movie. The acting was terrible, the plot was all over the place and the characters were hard to connect with, especially Joey. It's no wonder that this is the young actor's only acting credit :/
- DirectorSam RaimiStarsTobey MaguireKirsten DunstTopher GraceA strange black entity from another world bonds with Peter Parker and causes inner turmoil as he contends with new villains, temptations, and revenge.Way too many plots happening to have a coherent movie. TPTB should have focused on one or two.
- StarsJulianne MooreClive OwenJennifer Jason LeighA widow becomes the object of a dangerous stalker, obsessed with her husband's work.As a huge fan of Stephen King's work, I really wanted to like this movie, but if you are praying that the main character's stalker kills her and her entire family, you know that this movie didn't hit it's mark.
- DirectorDon ScardinoStarsSteve CarellLuke VanekSteve BuscemiA veteran Vegas magician tries to revive his career after his longtime partner quits, he gets fired from his casino act, and an edgy new "street magician" steals his thunder.Have you ever watched a movie so stupid and pointless that it literally made you angry? Just a ridiculously unfunny mess of a movie.
- DirectorVictor SalvaStarsJonathan BreckRay WiseNicki AycoxSet a few days after the original, a championship basketball team's bus is attacked by The Creeper, the winged, flesh-eating terror, on the last day of his 23-day feeding frenzy.After the disappointing second half of the first "Jeepers Creepers" movie, I was hoping that the sequel would be where the franchise would redeem itself. Unfortunately, it just sank it down further into oblivion. :(
- DirectorBryan SingerStarsBrandon RouthKevin SpaceyKate BosworthSuperman returns to Earth after spending five years in space examining his homeworld Krypton. But he finds things have changed while he was gone, and he must once again prove himself important to the world.I blame Bryan Singer for not only ruining one film series, but two. He left X-Men 3 in the clumsy hands of Brett Ratner to screw up Superman. Recycled lines from the original series, casting Kate Bosworth as Lois Lane, making Clark Kent a useless forth wheel and making Superman a baby's daddy. Gee, thanks Bryan! :P
- DirectorOz PerkinsStarsSophia LillisSamuel LeakeyAlice KrigeA long time ago in a distant fairy tale countryside, a young girl leads her little brother into a dark wood in desperate search of food and work, only to stumble upon a nexus of terrifying evil.This had the potential to be a great reimagining of a fairy tale classic, but it dragged in a lot of places and the plot made no sense at all.
- DirectorTim BurtonStarsJohnny DeppFreddie HighmoreDavid KellyCharlie, a young boy from an impoverished family, and four other kids win a tour of an amazing chocolate factory run by an imaginative chocolatier, Willy Wonka, and his staff of Oompa-Loompas.I was a huge fan of Tim Burton and Johnny Depp and this was not their best collaboration. I didn't like Johnny interpretation of Willy Wonka. It was just too over the top and a little creepy. I know a lot of fans of this movie feel it's superior over the Gene Wilder version because it's closer to the book, but that doesn't make it better, IMO.
- DirectorThomas Della BellaStarsTodd LoweBrooke ButlerHannah NordbergWhen a family moves into an old Victorian home, they discover a chest in the attic containing antiques inhabited by an evil spirit. As the antiques slowly possess each family member, the spirit grows stronger.I really need to listen to the ratings on streaming services before I waste my time watching movies like this one. Boring plot, horrible characters, not scary in the least.
- DirectorMichael AptedStarsJennifer LopezBilly CampbellTessa AllenAfter running away fails, a terrified woman empowers herself in order to battle her abusive husband.As if Jennifer Lopez's shortcomings as an actress weren't bad enough, the whole plot of the film was way to hokey to be believable. If you want a great movie about a woman finding a new life after leaving her abusive husband, go watch "Sleeping With The Enemy".
- DirectorGil KenanStarsSam RockwellRosemarie DeWittKennedi ClementsA family whose suburban home is haunted by evil forces must come together to rescue their youngest daughter after the apparitions take her captive.Why does Hollywood insist on making remakes of classics? This was a horrendous attempt at remaking an 80's horror classic. Unlike the Freeling family, the Bowens were completely unsympathetic, mainly because the parents were just the absolute worst! They couldn't care less about their children and most of the heavy lifting as far as the focus of the movie is their young son which I find is a strange choice the filmmakers made. Plus, not the least bit scary! >:(
- DirectorMalcolm D. LeeStarsSamuel L. JacksonBernie MacSharon LealThough it's been about twenty years since they have spoken with one another, two estranged soul-singing legends agree to participate in a reunion performance at the Apollo Theater to honor their recently deceased band leader.Why oh why did this have to be Bernie Mac's and Issac Hayes' last movie. Painfully unfunny and kind of gross in some places.
- DirectorWalt DohrnDavid P. SmithStarsAnna KendrickJustin TimberlakeRachel BloomWhen the Queen of the Hard Rock Trolls tries to take over all the Troll kingdoms, Queen Poppy and her friends try different ways to save all the Trolls.I loved the first Trolls movie to death, but I don't know what they were thinking with this one. Poppy lost all her character growth and she was more unlikable than before and did the filmmaker totally forget that Branch got his color back in the first movie? Why is he still gray? My favorite characters from the last film, Gristle and Bridget, only show up in the post credits scene? Just some very sloppy storytelling and a boring plot.
- DirectorDave McKeanStarsStephanie LeonidasJason BarryRob BrydonIn a fantasy world of opposing kingdoms, a fifteen-year-old girl must find the fabled MirrorMask in order to save the kingdom and get home.I really wanted to like this because I'm such a huge fan of "Labyrinth", but the bad special effects, confusing plot and horrible acting put a huge damper on that.
- DirectorThomas CarterStarsJulia StilesSean Patrick ThomasKerry WashingtonA white midwestern girl moves to Chicago, where her new boyfriend is a black teen from the South Side with a rough, semi-criminal past.Didn't like the dancing, especially at the end audition, the chemistry was non-existent and I couldn't connect with the characters.
- DirectorLawrence GutermanStarsJamie KennedyTraylor HowardAlan CummingTim Avery, an aspiring cartoonist, finds himself in a predicament when his dog stumbles upon the mask of Loki. Then after conceiving an infant son "born of the mask", he discovers just how looney child raising can be.If you've seen it, I don't really need an explanation of why I thought it was bad.
- DirectorCuyle CarvinStarsThomas DowneyDee WallaceTrinity SimpsonA struggling children's book author and his rebellious teenage daughter move into a house they've inherited and find mysterious dolls in the attic. The father and daughter soon learn that the dolls have a sinister - and deadly - past.Horrifically boring and that's the kiss of death for what's suppose to be a horror movie.
- DirectorJoe BerlingerStarsJeffrey DonovanStephen Barker TurnerErica LeerhsenA group of tourists arrives in Burkittsville, Maryland after seeing The Blair Witch Project (1999) to explore the mythology and phenomenon, only to come face to face with their own neuroses and possibly the witch herself.Basically a shameless way of capitalizing on the Blair Witch Project craze that was happening at the time. Badly written and acted, characters so unsympathetic I was praying for them all to die at the end and so many loose ends that never got tied up, it was frustrating.
- DirectorLuke JadenStarsJaden PinerRob ZabreckyAurora PerrineauA torn suburban family refuses to heed the warning of an innocent prank left upon them which causes an unknown supernatural force to wreak havoc.This movie was complete trash and not scary at all. The family at the center of it was completely unsympathetic and the movie on the whole was pretty much a giant smoking ad because that's all the characters ever did.
- DirectorDave BorthwickJean DuvalFrank PassinghamStarsJon StewartJudi DenchDaniel TayThe clumsy dog Doogal frees a cruel wizard, who seeks to find three magical diamonds capable of, together, freezing the sun. Now, a slug, a cow, a rabbit, and a train, led by Doogal, will have to save the world.Basically, the Magic Roundabout without the magic. Just plain awful.
- DirectorBrad BirdStarsGeorge ClooneyBritt RobertsonHugh LaurieBound by a shared destiny, a teen bursting with scientific curiosity and a former boy-genius inventor embark on a mission to unearth the secrets of a place somewhere in time and space that exists in their collective memory.Another movie that's an exercise in style over substance. While visually stunning, the storyline was hollow, preachy and disjointed, mainly because the writers couldn't decide who's suppose to be at the center of the story... Frank or Casey.
- DirectorMatthew VaughnStarsTaron EgertonColin FirthMark StrongAfter the Kingsman's headquarters is destroyed and the world is held hostage, an allied spy organization in the United States is discovered. These two elite secret agencies must band together to defeat a common enemy.Not only was this movie a less than stellar sequel to its predecessor, but it was shockingly even more misogynistic than the first one. The only useful female characters are either underutilized or are killed off in the first 10 minutes (RIP Roxy aka Lancelot).
What was with the completely unbelievable relationship between Eggsy and the princess of Sweden? They had anal sex once... that's hardly a basis for a lasting relationship. He should have been with Roxy, the woman he bonded with during basic training and who's saved his bacon on more than one occasion. And let me not even get into the scene with Eggsy planting of the tracking device in a woman's vagina. WTF were they thinking?! >:( - DirectorGina Prince-BythewoodStarsSanaa LathanOmar EppsGlenndon ChatmanMonica and Quincy love and play basketball together through many life challenges from childhood to adulthood.The plot (especially the ending) was just pure bulls**t! Me and my sister thought the main characters' motivations made them horribly unlikable. So much so, I couldn't root for them living happily ever after and that's just really bad writing for a movie that is suppose to be romantic.
- DirectorChris BuckFawn VeerasunthornStarsAriana DeBoseChris PineAlan TudykA young girl named Asha wishes on a star and gets a more direct answer than she bargained for when a trouble-making star comes down from the sky to join her.What can I say about this mediocre romp that hasn't been said already? Bad, cheap looking animation, weak storyline, forgettable characters, unremarkable songs etc. Just one bad idea after another. :(
- DirectorMike NewellStarsJulia RobertsKirsten DunstJulia StilesA free-thinking art professor teaches conservative 1950s Wellesley girls to question their traditional social roles.I really wanted to like this movie, but the characters were totally unsympathetic and unlikable especially Julia Roberts' and Kirsten Dunst's. Julia's character and her motivations were completely out of whack especially her relationships with her fiance and the Italian teacher and Kirsten's character was so horrible, you wanted to throttle her within an inch of her life. The only character I liked was Ginnifer Goodwin's and she was barely shown. Just awful! :P
- DirectorGeorge Tillman Jr.StarsVanessa WilliamsVivica A. FoxNia LongOne person can keep a family together and, when that one person is gone, a family can be torn apart.The main reason that this film rubs me the wrong way is because the family's treatment of Terri(Vanessa Williams) is nothing short of atrocious. They act like because she's not best friends with her sister Maxine(Vivica A. Fox) or that she can't stand her skank cousin Faith(Gina Ravera), it's her fault for being unreasonable.
Maxine screwed around with Terri's boyfriend(Jeffery D. Sams) and THEN married him! Her cousin slept with her husband Miles(Michael Beach) and instead of standing by her when her cheating husband and skank cousin were messing around, they threw it up in her face and actually embraced them at the final Sunday dinner! I couldn't believe that crap! If this film is suppose to be about family unity, I'd sure like to know where the hell it is? - DirectorGriffin DunneStarsSandra BullockNicole KidmanStockard ChanningTwo witch sisters, raised by their eccentric aunts in a small town, face closed-minded prejudice and a curse which threatens to prevent them ever finding lasting love.This was a movie I really wanted to like, but the strange twists and turns the plot took left me scratching my head. This is suppose to be a story about a family of witches, but their magical powers are completely lame. The whole town supposedly hates and fears them throughout the movie, but are more than willing to help exorcise a malevolent spirit that possesses one of the witch sisters, Gillian, only because the younger sister, Sally, is part of a neighborhood emergency phone tree?! O.o. Apparently, that trumps everything that happened up until that point! *rolls eyes* Another thing is that the movie can't decide if it's a fantasy, horror, drama or comedy because it's trying to do it all and failing miserably.
- DirectorIain SoftleyStarsBrendan FraserAndy SerkisEliza BennettA teenage girl discovers her father has an amazing talent to bring characters out of their books and must try to stop a freed villain from destroying them all, with the help of her father, her aunt, and a storybook's hero.Brendan Fraser was the worst thing in this film. His flat acting and how unconvincing he was as a father brought the whole film down. It shocks and saddens me that he was actually the inspiration for the character in the first place. What was the author thinking?! Not even Paul Bettany's brilliant performance as Dustfinger could save this bland movie.
- DirectorZach HelmStarsNatalie PortmanDustin HoffmanJason BatemanThe young apprentice of a magical, eccentric toy store owner learns to believe in herself, and in her friends, upon learning some grave news about the future.A not very fantastic fantasy movie with a paper thin plot and zero character development that was just silly for the sake of being silly. Disappointing! :P
- DirectorGerard BushChristopher RenzStarsJanelle MonáeEric LangeJena MaloneSuccessful author Veronica Henley finds herself trapped in a horrifying reality and must uncover the mind-bending mystery before it's too late.Who wrote this God-awful mess of a movie?! It was so disjointed, pointless, and confusing. The pacing was so off that nothing of any importance actually happened until the last 1/3 of the movie. The trailer misrepresented the film as some kind of time travel story, but it just ended up as weird kidnappings of prominent Afro-Americans forced onto a fake plantation as slaves by crazy, racist white people. O.o WTF!?
- DirectorP.J. HoganStarsIsla FisherHugh DancyKrysten RitterA college grad lands a job as a financial journalist in New York City to support where she nurtures her shopping addiction and falls for a wealthy entrepreneur.The lead character was so self-centered, shallow and unsympathetic, it was ridiculous and to top it off, for some reason, the movie had the nerve to make the debt collector whom she avoids like a immature child, the bad guy. Just an irresponsible and awful movie! :P
- DirectorDaniel BarnzStarsAlex PettyferVanessa HudgensMary-Kate OlsenA modern-day take on the "Beauty and the Beast" tale where a New York teen is transformed into a hideous monster in order to find true love.I had low expectations going into this film, but after seeing it they plummeted even further. The leads, Kyle and Lindy(Alex Pettyfer & Vanessa Hudgens) have no chemistry with each other, Kyle wasn't bad enough to totally dislike and wish this fate upon and Lindy wasn't likable enough to fall in love with.
The plot was thin and unbelievable, even for a fantasy and there were no real sacrifices made other than the fact that the lead character wanted his good looks back. Hell, the brother of the drug dealer that Lindy's father killed could have came back and threw a new degree of difficulty into their courtship or something to that effect, but no. No risks, no foul and no exciting ending because of it. :P - DirectorDavid OyelowoStarsDavid OyelowoAmiah MillerLonnie ChavisA boy sets out on a quest to save his ill mother by searching for a mythic figure said to have magical healing powers.Just the epitome of pointless. A little boy goes on a quest to find the legendary, "Water Man" who is supposedly gifted with powers to heal the sick. He goes on this quest to cure his cancer stricken mother. There's an annoying young girl that goes on this quest with him. Long story short, they almost get themselves killed in a forest fire, the Water Man isn't real, and the mother never gets cured. This was a hour and 30 minutes that I will never get back!
- DirectorZack SnyderStarsEmily BrowningVanessa HudgensAbbie CornishA young girl institutionalized by her abusive stepfather retreats to an alternative reality as a coping strategy and envisions a plan to help her escape.A pure exercise in style over substance. Little to no character development, a plot so thin you can see through it, horrible acting and over the top CGI that doesn't connect with the narrative on any level. The biggest flaw of all is the fact the whole movie is a fantasy within a fantasy. Because of this, there's no emotional connect with the characters or any real sense of danger, because we have no idea what's really happening to them in the real world of the asylum. Zach Snyder uses the excuse of not wanting to exploit the abuse of the women, but when he takes that away, he doesn't give the audience a better alternative to latch on to. Just dismal, depressing and boring. :P
- DirectorPeter JacksonStarsRachel WeiszMark WahlbergSaoirse RonanCenters on a young girl who has been murdered and watches over her family - and her killer - from purgatory. She must weigh her desire for vengeance against her desire for her family to heal.The sad thing about me not liking this movie is really because the ending was so *beep* up. I was totally on board with the first 2/3rd's of the movie(Saoirse Ronan and especially Stanley Tucci were absolutely amazing in their roles as the murdered girl and her killer) and watching the family being torn apart by not knowing where she was, what happened to her or who did it was nothing short of engrossing, but the poorly resolved ending completely short-changed everything that happened up until that point.
We grew to care for the girl and her family and wanted nothing short of this predator's head on a silver platter. But the unsatisfying "sometimes bad stuff happens to good people and there's nothing we can do about it, so move on with your life" claptrap of an ending was more like a punch in the gut than a resolution. I can't tell you how much that ruined my enjoyment of what could have been a great movie. :( - DirectorRupert WainwrightStarsTom WellingMaggie GraceSelma BlairA thick mist full of vengeful spirits haunts a prosperous island town off the coast of Oregon, as its inhabitants try to learn their town's dark secret in order to stop it.This is a remake that never should have been made. A muddled mess of a storyline, horrible acting, unsympathetic characters and not scary in the least. If you want to see this story done right, watch the original.
- DirectorColin TheysStarsJesse JamesMagda ApanowiczBill MoseleyJohnny Petrie learns on his 18th birthday that he was adopted after inheriting a farm in Maine. Eager to start a new life, Johnny leaves home so he can began afresh in this "new" dwelling. However, Johnny soon discovers that the farm, which has been abandoned for eighteen years since his natural family died, harbors a horrifying history about the deaths of said natural family.This movie just dragged on for miles, no sympathetic characters and some seriously horrific acting.
- DirectorAllison AndersStarsIdina MenzelNia LongSanai VictoriaThe friendship between two women from childhood onwards.What in God's name were they thinking when they made this remake?! Normally, I love Nia Long and Idina Menzel, but this was complete garbage. Their friendship seemed completely forced and unbelievable and the changes to the story were completely unwarranted. Just a complete disappointment. :(
- DirectorSteven SpielbergStarsHarrison FordCate BlanchettShia LaBeoufIndiana Jones becomes entangled in a Soviet plot to uncover the secret behind mysterious artifacts known as the Crystal Skulls.This was a sequel I could have done without. The plot was too busy and soulless, the CGI was excessive and unnecessary and why in God's name was Shia LaBeouf cast in this? It just didn't do very much for me.
- DirectorRenny HarlinStarsSteven StraitSebastian StanToby HemingwayFour young men who belong to a New England supernatural legacy are forced to battle an elusive fifth power.One thing that really makes me angry is wasted potential in a movie. This could have been great(like a male version of "The Craft"), but the plot was ridiculous, the acting was terrible, the CGI was unimpressive and the one-liners were gag-inducing, i.e. "I"m gonna make you my witch!" o.O WTF was that?!!! The movie has some of the sexiest young actors in Hollywood in it and it just reeked to high heaven. Love Taylor Kitsch, Steven Strait and Sebastian Stan, but hotness alone doesn't make a good movie.
- DirectorBob DolmanStarsSusan SarandonGoldie HawnGeoffrey RushLavinia and Suzette, former rock groupies and best friends, reconnect after twenty years; one is still as wild as ever, while the other has adopted a more conservative lifestyle.This is another one that falls under the whole wasted potential argument in my opinion. The plot was very choppy and the about face of Lavinia(Vinny) after years of being a conservative housewife and her family's acceptance of it was too quick and disjointed to be believable. And, as much as I love Geoffrey Rush, his character didn't add much to the plot to warrant his character even being there. Loved the concept of discovering or rediscovering yourself, but the movie didn't execute it well. :(
- DirectorSalim AkilStarsJordin SparksCarmen EjogoWhitney HoustonIn the 1960s, three sisters form a girl group and soon become local sensations with major label interest, but fame becomes a challenge as the close-knit family begins to fall apart.Again, just another example of the kind of wasted potential that I mentioned before. This seriously paled in comparison to the original Sparkle in every way, shape and form. It was completely devoid of any soul or personality in story, plot, acting, directing, costuming, singing, choreography etc.
Jordin Sparks can't act her way out of a wet paper bag, her and Derek Luke have no chemistry whatsoever and Carmen Ejogo can't hold a candle to Lonette McKee in sex appeal or singing ability. T.D. Jakes who executive produced this snoozefest, rewrote the more harder edged plot of the first film and homogenized it for no good reason. I know he probably wanted to make a cautionary tale that he would be able to show to his congregation, but he should have just written his own and left this one alone. - DirectorDanny BoyleStarsHimesh PatelLily JamesSophia Di MartinoA struggling musician realizes he's the only person on Earth who can remember The Beatles after waking up in an alternate reality where they never existed.I'm probably going to get a lot of grief for this considering how critically acclaimed this movie was, but I genuinely didn't like this film. I guess I'm just such a huge Beatles fan that the thought their music just being forgotten and then reintroduced by this somewhat unlikable guy kinda made me upset and by the end of the film, the world never went back to where it was and the Beatles and their music was never restored. That really kinda irked me.
- DirectorAndrew AdamsonStarsBen BarnesSkandar KeynesGeorgie HenleyThe Pevensie siblings return to Narnia, where they are enlisted to once again help ward off an evil king and restore the rightful heir to the land's throne, Prince Caspian.So boring and hardly anything like the book. Caspian's voice was the wrong choice. It was so forced and irritating to listen to. The chemistry between Caspian and Susan was nonexistent and frankly not necessary for the story.
- DirectorPenelope BuitenhuisStarsMiguel FerrerLaura MennellBrendan PennyA group of family and friends on a camping trip through the Texas badlands are taken on a one-way ride to Hell after they inadvertently witness a ritual sacrifice at a deserted campsite. Pursued by the devil worshiping biker gang responsible, they hole up in an abandoned church near the border, only to discover that they are pawns in a decades-old battle between good and evil.For a movie that's suppose to be a scary horror film, it was completely long winded and tedious. The protagonists were so annoying, I couldn't sympathize with them and the villains weren't scary at all. Just horrible!
- DirectorJeff BurrStarsAndrew RobinsonAmi DolenzSoleil Moon FryeThrill-seeking teenagers resurrect a demon from his grave and a bloody rampage for revenge begins.On top of the really stupid plot, this movie had probably some of the WORST ACTING I have ever seen! So overly dramatic in places, it was cringe worthy!! :P
- DirectorJonathan MostowStarsArnold SchwarzeneggerNick StahlKristanna LokenA machine from a post-apocalyptic future travels back in time to protect a man and a woman from an advanced robotic assassin to ensure they both survive a nuclear attack.Pales in comparison to the two previous Terminator movies. 1)No Linda Hamilton, 2)the female Terminator was not frightening or impressive on any level. 3)Nick Stahl and Clare Danes were horribly miscast and had no chemistry. Just plain bad!
- DirectorHayao MiyazakiStarsCate BlanchettMatt DamonLiam NeesonA five-year-old boy develops a relationship with Ponyo, a young goldfish princess who longs to become a human after falling in love with him.I'm usually a huge fan of Hayao Miyazaki's animated films, but this one unfortunately lacked any real character development or conflict. The narrative just seemed very pointless and all over the place. Ponyo is just trying way too hard to be cute and ends up becoming very annoying.
As far as consequences for one's actions, there are none addressed in the film. Ponyo disobeys her father and proceeds to wreck the balance of nature in her quest to become human by creating a tsunami that destroys a small unnamed town. Is she ever punished for this? No. In fact, she gets exactly what she wants from her selfish actions: to be human and live with Sasuke. Bad moral lesson being tacked on here. - DirectorLouis LeterrierStarsJesse EisenbergCommonMark RuffaloAn FBI agent and an Interpol detective track a team of illusionists who pull off bank heists during their performances, and reward their audiences with the money.I can't tell you how much I wanted to like this movie, but unfortunately, the more I watched it, the more the overall story fell apart. The movie was interesting as individual scenes but not as a whole and the final reveal at the end made absolutely no sense. Whomever wrote this story has no idea how to foreshadow properly. Just another example of wasted potential.
- DirectorGil KenanStarsMaggie SmithIsabella O'SullivanJoel FryIn this origin story of Father Christmas, an ordinary boy--with a loyal pet mouse and a reindeer at his side--sets out on an extraordinary adventure to find his father, who is on a quest to discover the fabled village of Elfhelm.I thought this movie had an interesting concept, but it was very poorly executed, the pacing was way off and the big reveal at the end turned out to be much ado about nothing.
- DirectorPatrick WilsonStarsTy SimpkinsPatrick WilsonRose ByrneThe Lamberts must go deeper into The Further than ever before to put their demons to rest once and for all.I was so looking forward to this installment of the Insidious franchise, but OMG, this was so long, drawn out and boring. It was like two different movies in one and both were terrible to watch. The plot was stupid, the established characters seemed like they forgotten how to act, and the new characters were worthless. Completely disappointing. :(
- DirectorKasi LemmonsStarsNaomi AckieStanley TucciAshton SandersA joyous, emotional, heartbreaking celebration of the life and music of Whitney Houston, one of the greatest female R&B pop vocalists of all time, tracking her journey from obscurity to musical super stardom.This was probably the most boring and pointless musical biopic I've ever watched. Nothing that was revealed about Whitney was either surprising or compelling. By now, everyone knows about her relationship with Bobby Brown and her secret relationship with her girlfriend, Robyn. Plus, her pivotal performance at the Grammys at the end of the film really made it go out on a whimper.
- DirectorDavid F. SandbergStarsZachary LeviAsher AngelJack Dylan GrazerThe film continues the story of teenage Billy Batson who, upon reciting the magic word "SHAZAM!", is transformed into his adult superhero alter ego, Shazam.This was not a good follow up to the first movie. There were a lot of unnecessary subplots and side characters that were completely uninteresting and that made no sense.