And The Oscar For Worst Oscar-Winning Movie Of The Year Goes To...
Only winners of the coveted "Fedor's Oscar" are listed here.
Every year Hollywood rewards itself for some of the worst movies it'd made in the previous year, proudly ignoring the truly outstanding films of that year. The fact that they refer to these awards as "Best" must be some kind of an in-joke that I fail as yet to understand.
Let's face it; the Oscars have very little to do with acting, directing or writing quality and everything to do with left-wing politics, hyping the next nepotist kid, the big studios outbidding each other, backroom deals, fat envelopes exchanging hands, and most ludicrous of all the creation of the infamous "Oscar buzz" - the hyping of potential future winners and runners-up before the movies even go into production. That's how laughable the whole circus is. Anyone who takes these awards seriously only has themselves to blame.
The competition for the worst of the worst is very limited in scope, but stiff. In the running are almost always only left-wing propaganda films, unrealistic bio-dramas of iconic historical figures (that either trash or idealize its subject matter), dramas with invalids, costumers without an interesting story, and soap-operatic chick-flicks posing as "deep drama". These are nearly always neck-and-neck, fighting over the golden statuettes. Due to the fairly large number of bad movies jostling for the moronic award they call the "Oscar", I have often listed runner-up movies that are almost as bad as the winning film.
As is to be expected (and as is indeed the intention of the whole hoopla), the gullible and hype-happy masses rush to the cinemas and their DVD stores after each award ceremony, thinking naively that these films truly are the creme-de-la-crop of the previous year. Ts, ts, ts. Even when they leave the viewing disappointed, many still try to convince themselves that the film was good. They force themselves to like it, because - after all - "it's an Oscar winner!". No backbone at all, such viewers. They're the same people who buy a rap album because it picked up a few Grammys.
The list starts off with the worst Oscar-winning film of 2010, and then goes backward.
The list is not yet complete. Plenty more bad movies to be added later. However, the worst Oscar-winners are to be found in the past 30 years, hence the list is almost as good as done.
COMMENTS: The comments section changes introduced several years ago have basically ruined what used to be a fun interaction between list-maker and reader, hence I will be disabling comments on nearly all of my lists. (I said nearly: you're free to spend an hour perusing my other lists to find one that does allow comments.) So if you want to let me know what you think, PM me.
Oh no, wait. They've disabled PMs. So I guess there is no way you can share your views of my lists and reviews with me. That's called "progress".
Every year Hollywood rewards itself for some of the worst movies it'd made in the previous year, proudly ignoring the truly outstanding films of that year. The fact that they refer to these awards as "Best" must be some kind of an in-joke that I fail as yet to understand.
Let's face it; the Oscars have very little to do with acting, directing or writing quality and everything to do with left-wing politics, hyping the next nepotist kid, the big studios outbidding each other, backroom deals, fat envelopes exchanging hands, and most ludicrous of all the creation of the infamous "Oscar buzz" - the hyping of potential future winners and runners-up before the movies even go into production. That's how laughable the whole circus is. Anyone who takes these awards seriously only has themselves to blame.
The competition for the worst of the worst is very limited in scope, but stiff. In the running are almost always only left-wing propaganda films, unrealistic bio-dramas of iconic historical figures (that either trash or idealize its subject matter), dramas with invalids, costumers without an interesting story, and soap-operatic chick-flicks posing as "deep drama". These are nearly always neck-and-neck, fighting over the golden statuettes. Due to the fairly large number of bad movies jostling for the moronic award they call the "Oscar", I have often listed runner-up movies that are almost as bad as the winning film.
As is to be expected (and as is indeed the intention of the whole hoopla), the gullible and hype-happy masses rush to the cinemas and their DVD stores after each award ceremony, thinking naively that these films truly are the creme-de-la-crop of the previous year. Ts, ts, ts. Even when they leave the viewing disappointed, many still try to convince themselves that the film was good. They force themselves to like it, because - after all - "it's an Oscar winner!". No backbone at all, such viewers. They're the same people who buy a rap album because it picked up a few Grammys.
The list starts off with the worst Oscar-winning film of 2010, and then goes backward.
The list is not yet complete. Plenty more bad movies to be added later. However, the worst Oscar-winners are to be found in the past 30 years, hence the list is almost as good as done.
COMMENTS: The comments section changes introduced several years ago have basically ruined what used to be a fun interaction between list-maker and reader, hence I will be disabling comments on nearly all of my lists. (I said nearly: you're free to spend an hour perusing my other lists to find one that does allow comments.) So if you want to let me know what you think, PM me.
Oh no, wait. They've disabled PMs. So I guess there is no way you can share your views of my lists and reviews with me. That's called "progress".
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- DirectorDavid FincherStarsJesse EisenbergAndrew GarfieldJustin TimberlakeAs Harvard student Mark Zuckerberg creates the social networking site that would become known as Facebook, he is sued by the twins who claimed he stole their idea and by the co-founder who was later squeezed out of the business.Just when you thought Fincher could not fall any further. Idiotic subject matter, awful cast: these two have become the mainstays of his recent films. Once the hope of American cinema, now just one of many sell-outs trying to hoplesslyl balance box-office cash with "artistic" intentions. Justin Timberlake. Nuff said.
But in this tremendously crap year we also had "The King's Speech", "Inception", and "The Black Swan". - DirectorJames CameronStarsSam WorthingtonZoe SaldanaSigourney WeaverA paraplegic Marine dispatched to the moon Pandora on a unique mission becomes torn between following his orders and protecting the world he feels is his home.The only way I can explain "Avatar" without insulting Cameron is to assume that he was working on a political sci-fi parody but then changed his mind in the last minute.
"The Hurt Locker" has Bigelow's usual low standards, and "The Blind Side" is just as trashy as nearly every other Sandra Bullock flick, but neither could match "Avatar"'s badness, pound for pound. - DirectorGus Van SantStarsSean PennJosh BrolinEmile HirschThe story of American gay activist Harvey Milk, who fought for gay rights and was elected as California's first openly gay official.Starring a left-wing activist actor (1) in a movie directed by a gay director (2) plays a homosexual mayor (3) who was no less than murdered (4) in the 70s (5) in a biopic (6) and in which Penn has a kissing scene with a guy (7): that's at least 7 very strong reasons why this movie HAD to sweep the awards in one of the most predictable years on record. Sean Penn knew exactly what he was doing by taking on this role: an Oscar was a 100% guarantee.
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" was in hot contention too. Fincher's downward slide was all-too evident, and Hollywood was there to reward him for it i.e. to encourage his decision to become a cheese-making sell-out. The Academy of Bad Arts & Dubious Sciences pretty much ignored his best movies, the first 4, so perhaps David thought he'd try making awful movies full of "meaningful drama" and empty-headed sentimentality instead. The strategy worked. - DirectorJason ReitmanStarsElliot PageMichael CeraJennifer GarnerFaced with an unplanned pregnancy, an offbeat young woman makes a selfless decision regarding the unborn child.Tim Burton's crap-fest "Sweeney Todd" was a very close second. Helena Bonham tried her best, singing even worse than Depp and the others combined, but in the end "Juno" was just too powerful in its ineptness to be overtaken by any celluloidal abomination.
GOLDEN OSCAR RULE: Whenever the nepotistic offspring of a well-known director makes a feature film (provided it isn't a horror film or a comedy), he has far bigger chances of getting his first Oscars straight away than a director who doesn't have family connections. Ditto actors. This is known as the "you scratch my son's/daughter's back, I'll scratch your son's/daughter's back" rule. This helps keep nepotism the formidable force that it is in movie la-la-land. Talkin' 'bout Ivan Reitman's inept boy. - DirectorMartin ScorseseStarsLeonardo DiCaprioMatt DamonJack NicholsonAn undercover cop and a mole in the police attempt to identify each other while infiltrating an Irish gang in South Boston.Who hadn't laughed at the absurd twists in Scorsese's silly gangster flick? However, it fought hard to keep "An Inconvenient Truth" and "Pan's Labyrinth" at bay.
- DirectorAng LeeStarsJake GyllenhaalHeath LedgerMichelle WilliamsEnnis and Jack are two shepherds who develop a sexual and emotional relationship. Their relationship becomes complicated when both of them get married to their respective girlfriends.A particularly smelly year, with so many hot contenders for the Worst Oscar-Winner award, with anti-gems such as "Syriana", "Good Night, Good Luck", "Walk The Line", "King Kong" and "Crash", all in hot pursuit of the gay cowboys.
Honestly, all of those are just as bad as Ang Lee's little politically-correct sure-fire-winner opus, but BM really does have that extra something that separates the men from the boys. - DirectorSam RaimiStarsTobey MaguireKirsten DunstAlfred MolinaPeter Parker is beset with troubles in his failing personal life as he battles a former brilliant scientist named Otto Octavius.Even "The Aviator" and "Finding Neverland" could not possibly match the badness of the spidery franchise's second entry.
- DirectorPatty JenkinsStarsCharlize TheronChristina RicciBruce DernBased on the life of Aileen Wuornos, a Daytona Beach prostitute who became a serial killer.Who could forget Charlize's hilarious portrayal of America's worst female serial-killer? (By "worst" I mean "best", of course, i.e. successful.) Putting all that make-up on only served to maker her even funnier. The snag is that it's meant to be a drama and not a spoof.
Not even "Mystic River" and "Lost In Translation" could be this bad. - DirectorMichael MooreStarsMichael MooreCharlton HestonMarilyn MansonFilmmaker Michael Moore explores the roots of America's predilection for gun violence.You have to make a monumentally idiotic, biased, laughable documentary in order to push away your fiction-based competition, which was no less stiff than "The Hours", "Gangs of New York", "Frida", "Chicago", "The Pianist" and "Adaptation". One of the truly worst Oscar years ever.
Did I say fiction-based? That goes for Moore's film, too.
GOLDEN OSCAR RULE: your documentary or feature film can be as bad as you can possibly make it, but as long as it is left-wing propaganda, it has a strong chance of being at least nominated. - DirectorBaz LuhrmannStarsNicole KidmanEwan McGregorJohn LeguizamoA poor Bohemian poet in 1890s Paris falls for a beautiful courtesan and nightclub star coveted by a jealous duke.One of the dullest - and reddest - musicals ever. Listening to Kidman whisper-sing in order to hide her inability to actually sing, that was just one of the many low-points, aside from the over-acting, the awful songs, and a plot that's hard to care about.
"Shrek" and "Pearl Harbour" have to contend with 2nd and 3rd places. - DirectorCameron CroweStarsBilly CrudupPatrick FugitKate HudsonA high-school boy in the early 1970s is given the chance to write a story for Rolling Stone magazine about an up-and-coming rock band as he accompanies them on their concert tour."Traffic" and "Erin Brockovich" never even stood a chance. "Almost Famous" is almost as bad as its inept cast.
- DirectorLasse HallströmStarsTobey MaguireCharlize TheronMichael CaineA compassionate young man, raised in an orphanage and trained to be a doctor there, decides to leave to see the world.Caine doing a bad Southern accent and Maguire being dull and sleepy as usual, combined with a truly cliche story, it was a recipe for disaster - or success, depends how you look at it. TCHR did manage to nudge out "Girl, Interrupted" for this award.
- DirectorJohn MaddenStarsGwyneth PaltrowJoseph FiennesGeoffrey RushThe world's greatest ever playwright, William Shakespeare, is young, out of ideas and short of cash, but meets his ideal woman and is inspired to write one of his most famous plays.Shakespeare in pain. And he's still hurting. Two nepotist actors with as much chemistry as two nose-picking kids in a school-play.
"What Dreams May Come", with Robin Williams f**ting about in Heaven and then Hell, who could ever forget that cheese? A far second, though. Next to SIL this was a classic. - DirectorJames CameronStarsLeonardo DiCaprioKate WinsletBilly ZaneA seventeen-year-old aristocrat falls in love with a kind but poor artist aboard the luxurious, ill-fated R.M.S. Titanic.OK, I admit I never saw this rubbish. Am I supposed to? It smells from a mile away. I'm scared of it. I want to be paid to watch this putrid carcass of a bomb.
"Good Will Hunting" fought a valiant fight to nudge out "Titanic" but even Affleck and Damon are no match for the powers of one called Cameron. - DirectorCameron CroweStarsTom CruiseCuba Gooding Jr.Renée ZellwegerWhen a sports agent has a moral epiphany and is fired for expressing it, he decides to put his new philosophy to the test as an independent agent with the only athlete who stays with him and his former colleague.You can't assemble a cast of amateurs and over-actors and expect me to laugh, you just can't. "Show me the money!" became one of the most embarrassing lines to come out of a comedy. Cringe cringe and cringe again.
- DirectorTim RobbinsStarsSusan SarandonSean PennRobert ProskyA nun, while comforting a convicted killer on death row, empathizes with both the killer and his victim's families.Sarandon as a nun, Tim directing, Penn as a thoughtful killer, and a typical Hollywood anti-death-penalty message. A left-winger stinker of truly Babylonian proportions. Nuff said.
- DirectorD.W. GordonStarsScott McCordRobin BrûléRobert FultonLiving on the Information Highway to HellNothing particularly awful this time around, believe it or not.
The "1994" caption above is just meant to reflect on the year, not the movie. - DirectorJonathan DemmeStarsTom HanksDenzel WashingtonRoberta MaxwellWhen a man with HIV is fired by his law firm because of his condition, he hires a homophobic-small time lawyer as the only willing advocate for a wrongful dismissal suit.Smart move, Tom. You were a second-rate comedian until you lucked out by snatching yourself a guaranteed-to-win-Oscars role in a politically correct drama.
Not even Williams dressed as a woman, in "Mrs.Doubtfire", could match the badness of this cheap TV-movie-of-the-week-type AIDS-based weeper. - DirectorRobert RedfordStarsCraig ShefferBrad PittTom SkerrittTwo sons of a stern minister - one reserved, one rebellious - grow up in rural 1920s Montana while devoted to fly fishing.Also "Bram Stoker's (i.e. Coppola's) Dracula", "The Last of the Mohicans", and "Howard's End".
Fenimore Cooper's infamously naive noble-savage fairy tale was spoofed and ridiculed to the utmost already back in the 19th century by Mark Twain, and yet still this awful novel gets the respect it doesn't deserve - just because it is politically correct to portray American Indians as caricatures of actual humans. - DirectorOliver StoneStarsKevin CostnerGary OldmanJack LemmonNew Orleans District Attorney Jim Garrison discovers there's more to the Kennedy assassination than the official story.Tinseltown loves Stone's imaginative fantasies. The dumber he makes them, the more awards he gets.
- DirectorRob ReinerStarsJames CaanKathy BatesRichard FarnsworthAfter a famous author is rescued from a car crash by a fan of his novels, he comes to realize that the care he is receiving is only the beginning of a nightmare of captivity and abuse.This is one of the worst movies ever made. A stereotypical plot, grade-A over-acting, and plot-twists that will have you either laughing or running.
Costner and his wolves ("Dances With Wolves") escaped the award by the skin of their teeth. - DirectorOliver StoneStarsTom CruiseBryan LarkinRaymond J. BarryThe biography of Ron Kovic. Paralyzed in the Vietnam war, he becomes an anti-war and pro-human rights political activist after feeling betrayed by the country for which he fought.You have to be insane to stick Cruise into a serious drama (even when it's laughably over-the-top such as a Stone drama), and then glue facial hair onto his hairless chin.
A truly awful year. "My Left Foot", "Abyss" and "Driving Miss Daisy" got away with murder just because Stone made another awful film, and that should tell you something. - DirectorRobert RedfordStarsRubén BladesRichard BradfordSonia BragaThe accidental breakdown of an irrigation valve launches a hot confrontation between the mainly Latino farmers in a tiny New Mexico town and the real estate developers and politicians determined to acquire their land for a golf resort.Redford knows that he stinks as a director, so it's always safer for him to do a political movie rather than a non-political one. The Oscar voters prefer it that way.
Plus "Beetlejuice", with Michael Keaton delivering one of the unfunniest performances ever. - DirectorNorman JewisonStarsCherNicolas CageOlympia DukakisLoretta Castorini, a bookkeeper from Brooklyn, New York, finds herself in a difficult situation when she falls for the brother of the man she has agreed to marry.Who can bear to watch Cher, Nicholas Cage and Olympia Dukakis, all at once? A terribly overrated Jewison comedy drama.
It certainly helped that it starred a cousin of that year's Democratic Presidential candidate (who eventually lost to Bush Sr.). Or do you actually believe that Olympia winning an Oscar - even though no-one has heard of her before or since then - was a mere coincidence?
"Wall Street", too. Another Stone flick about "Evil America"; Hollywood eats that stuff up, they love it. - DirectorJames IvoryStarsMaggie SmithHelena Bonham CarterDenholm ElliottLucy Honeychurch (Helena Bonham Carter) shares a brief romance with George Emerson in Florence. Yet as she tries to move on with her life and look for marriage elsewhere, can she truly forget the events of that summer?A run-of-the-mill chick-flick.
- DirectorSydney PollackStarsMeryl StreepRobert RedfordKlaus Maria BrandauerIn 20th-century colonial Kenya, a Danish baroness/plantation owner has a passionate love affair with a free-spirited big-game hunter.Out of their minds, more like. Sydney Pollack was a terribly overrated director, though an excellent actor.
"The Trip to Bountiful" was pretty horrendous too. - DirectorRobert BentonStarsSally FieldLindsay CrouseEd HarrisIn central Texas in the 1930s, a widow with two small children tries to save her small 40-acre farm with the help of a blind boarder and an itinerant black handyman."A Passage to India" was rather dumb, too. That movie had bad logic all over the place.
- DirectorBarbra StreisandStarsBarbra StreisandAmy IrvingMandy PatinkinA Jewish girl disguises herself as a boy to enter religious training.A cheese-classic 100 years from now. Not yet though, the wounds are still too fresh.
- DirectorRichard AttenboroughStarsBen KingsleyJohn GielgudRohini HattangadiThe life of the lawyer who became the famed leader of the Indian revolts against the British rule through his philosophy of nonviolent protest.Leading the pack in one of the very worst Oscars years is Attenborough's awful fantasy-based, extremely dull propaganda piece about Gandhi, that blissfully - and willfully - ignores all the nastier details about the man's life.
Followed by turkeys such as "Sophie's Choice", "Missing", and "E.T.". A year rich in fertilizer. - DirectorWarren BeattyStarsWarren BeattyDiane KeatonEdward HerrmannA radical American journalist becomes involved with the Communist revolution in Russia, and hopes to bring its spirit and idealism to the United States.Hey, guess why this mediocre bio-flick won all those Oscars.
"On Golden Pond" would have been a shoe-in in any other year, but Beatty's hommage to Marxism was just too awful in every respect, leaving the Fondas without yet another award they can be proud of. - DirectorRobert RedfordStarsDonald SutherlandMary Tyler MooreJudd HirschThe accidental death of the older son of an affluent family deeply strains the relationships among the bitter mother, the good-natured father and the guilt-ridden younger son.Yep, a year before they gave one to Beatty (a pretty-boy actor who can neither act nor direct) they gave it to Redford (a pretty-boy actor who can neither act nor direct). As long as you're left-wing the doors are open to you in Hollywood, no matter how lowly your talents.
- DirectorRobert BentonStarsDustin HoffmanMeryl StreepJane AlexanderAfter his wife leaves him, a work-obsessed Manhattan advertising executive is forced to learn long-neglected parenting skills, but a heated custody battle over the couple's young son deepens the wounds left by the separation.Every few years there seems to be a pointless, empty-headed chick-flick that sweeps up the awards. I don't want this film to go without the most important award there is, so here we are.
"Norma Rae", you tried hard, but KvsK was just too bad. - DirectorHal AshbyStarsJane FondaJon VoightBruce DernIn 1968 California, a woman whose husband is a Marine officer fighting in Vietnam falls in love with a former high school classmate who suffered a paralyzing combat injury in the war.A Vietnam vet comes back, emotionally and physically a wreck, the usual anti-war drivel. With Jane Fonda, the war's biggest opponent. Meaning? A shower of awards, of course. Never mind its TV-drama-of-the-week roots that are showing at nook and cranny.
- DirectorFred ZinnemannStarsJane FondaVanessa RedgraveJason RobardsAt the behest of an old and dear friend, playwright Lillian Hellman undertakes a dangerous mission to smuggle funds into Nazi Germany.Jane Fonda and Vanessa Redgrave in a dull biopic. That was guaranteed to get Oscar attention, just look at the political resume the two carried in the 70s, as the leading Hollywood activists for the Red Cause. They could have made a Disney comedy or even a Russ Meyer flick and it would have been well-received by the voters. They could do no wrong back then.
- DirectorAlan J. PakulaStarsDustin HoffmanRobert RedfordJack Warden"The Washington Post" reporters Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein uncover the details of the Watergate scandal that leads to President Richard Nixon's resignation.It's a mediocre, silly, and highly biased liberal flick, but as long as it has its politics (I mean "heart") in the right place, it can do no worse than pick up at least 2-3 of those statuettes.
"A Star Is Born", yet another awful Streisand vehicle, is right behind it. - DirectorAllan ShadoanStarsBarbara JacquesAllan ShadoanScott SeymourIn 1975 Marco Vincent had the beginnings of a wonderful future. A beautiful fiance, Good career, a great future, but one signature and a tragic accident may bring his future sooner than he expects.Only the second year so far with no crap being awarded.
1975 was such a strong year in terms of the quality that not even the Academy Award committee could dig out anything truly awful to shower with awards.
What was so special about 1975? "Barry Lyndon", "One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest", "The Sunshine Boys", "The Holy Grail", "Picnic At Hanging Rock", to name just a few of the excellent ones. - DirectorPeter DavisStarsTin ChanChau DiemNgo Dinh DiemA startling and courageous landmark documentary that unflinchingly confronted the United States' involvement in Vietnam at the height of the controversy that surrounded it.Yet another left-wing anti-war propaganda pseudo-documentary, "awarded" with a little golden statuette.
- DirectorSydney PollackStarsBarbra StreisandRobert RedfordBradford DillmanDuring post-WWII McCarthyism, a diametrically opposed couple come together only to find out that genuine friendship and physical attraction is not enough to overcome fundamental societal beliefs.Combine chick-flick sentimentality with a viciously left-wing political agenda/propaganda, and hire two of Hollywood's leading Socialists in the leading roles, and then get a left-wing director to film it all, and you really can't NOT get any Oscars, even if you tried. This awful piece of rubbish is a perfect example of this.
They "only" gave it two Oscars for the music, so ashamed were they to actually award it for "Best Picture" i.e. any of the more relevant categories. Yes, sometimes even the Academy Award committee feels shame.
Bergman's "Cries & Whispers" is a close second. A depressing, meaningless drama with a lesbian scene, and a pointless masturbation scene with broken glass. Real art. - DirectorLuis BuñuelStarsFernando ReyDelphine SeyrigPaul FrankeurA surreal, virtually plotless series of dreams centered around six middle-class people and their consistently interrupted attempts to have a meal together.Bunuel, an outspoken Marxist and hater of the bourgeoisie and everything capitalist (except making money through his distributors), really could have delivered an egg to the doorstep of the Academy Awards committee and still been worshiped and awarded for it. One of the most moronic, overrated pieces of "European cinema de l'arte" you will ever come across.
In second place is "The Candidate", an election-year propaganda film with Redford (who else) in the lead role. In almost every election year the Academy of Bad Arts and Dubious Sciences awards or nominates a left-wing flick that has elections as its subject matter.
"Cabaret". I can't stand this film's musical numbers. - DirectorPeter BogdanovichStarsTimothy BottomsJeff BridgesCybill ShepherdIn 1951, a group of high schoolers come of age in a bleak, isolated, atrophied North Texas town that is slowly dying, both culturally and economically.For some reason Peter Bogdanovich had been treated like a god, back in the day. This was his breakthrough rubbish.
In second place is the amazingly overrated "Klute", starring two of Hollywood's most vocal and radical Leftists, Jane Fonda and Donald Sutherland. Coincidence? - DirectorDavid LeanStarsRobert MitchumTrevor HowardJohn MillsSet in the wake of the 1916 Easter Rising, a married woman in a small Irish village has an affair with a troubled British officer.A badly acted, simplistic, dull, and pointless Lean picture. But Lean made it, it has expensive location photography, and it lasts a painful 3 hours "so we have to give him some awards at least".