Movies I consider to be Bad...

Quite possibly the laziest blockbuster of all-time. I enjoy the first three "Pirates" films, but this is a rip-off in every sense. I have seen blockbusters that are longer and possibly more generic, but I have yet to see one as unenergetic and downright bland as "On Stranger Tides".

The worst assembled movie I've ever seen. But I did laugh, a lot.

Just pure $hit. Badly acted, horribly shot, lazily written, poorly directed. How can you butcher such a simple concept? And how can you make a film that is worse than its' PG-13 predecessor?

Annoying and repetitive. Sacha Baron Cohen takes the near-genius satire of Borat and turns it into an endless string of gay jokes. Hey guess what, the title character is gay! Did I mention he's gay? One more time: Bruno is Gay!

After Borat, it's clear that Cohen believes America is filled with idiots, I paid to see this (as did many others) so he stands correct.

The best part is the blink and you'll miss it cameo by Harrison Ford.

Horribly made and unengaging. I shut this off after ten minutes and have never returned.

One of the worst mainstream comedies I've ever seen. I enjoyed "Meet the Parents" and "Meet the Fockers", but this thing is just all over the place. I found the humor in the first sequel to be broader, more repetitive and more over-the-top, but nothing prepared me for the mindlessness of this installment. I thought certain jokes would play out (like how real comedies do it) but they just sort of fall over and die. It all plays out like disconnected, bad SNL skits. The joke is introduced and then played out for all its' laughs rather quickly, and then tossed aside like moldy bread.

An unwatchable disappointment. The acting is atrocious, seeing Stallone, Arnold, and Willis on screen together is particularly cringe-worthy, the dialogue is howlingly bad in this scene, and the way it plays out is distracting and blatantly pointless. The action is horribly incoherent and boring. And the worst crime of all, its' incredibly dull, it doesn't even have the "Guilty Pleasure" entertainment value of a "Rambo: First Blood Part II" or "Commando". Just a lazy, unimaginative, time waster.

Shaky cam and smoke machines!

Lame, very lame.

The best things about this atrocity, is the enjoyably over the top performances by Robert Downey Jr. and Tommy Lee Jones; the visual style; and the insane prison riot sequence. Other than that, this is an annoying and insulting picture that showcases Stone's weird fetishes for two hours. I wouldn't have a problem with it if it weren't so self-indulgent and repetitive. Stone treats his audience as if they were complete idiots. Not only does he throw in the symbolism and spell it on the t-shirts of the characters (seriously), he actually has them explain it as well.

For two hours Stone tells us that the media creates serial killers. Sorry he doesn't just tell the audience, he hammers it into the brain to the point that you just wish Tarantino was able to adapt his own screenplay. I like a lot of Stone's films, (mainly the ones before NBK) but there is no doubt in my mind that Tarantino would have crafted a far superior product.

Oliver Stone made a stylistically similar film a few years later with "U-Turn", at least he brought actual dark humor to that film.

From the Director of "Boyz in the Hood"?

Quite dull for a Superman movie. Richard Pryor must have stumbled on the wrong sets. He doesn't seem to be in the same movie as everyone else, and the movie lingers on him far too long (he might have more screentime than Reeve). Don't get me wrong, it has its' moments (Clark returning to Smallville, the Lana scenes are nicely done, and Clark vs. Superman is pure trippy awesome) but they are too far and in between. "Superman IV: The Quest for Peace" may be worse, but it's miles more entertaining than this.

I wanted Godzilla to eat every human in this movie. Maybe save Ferris and Moe, but I hated, hated just about every person in this movie.

Even as a defender of the Transformers movies, I can't even say anything nice about Godzilla '98. If the Sam/Mikaela/Sam/Carly romance was too much for those films, it doesn't compare to lifelessness of the Nick/Audrey dynamic of Godzilla. At least Megan Fox and Rosie Huntington-Victoria's Secret model, were admittedly nice eye-candy (if over-exposed) and had something to do in the plot (very, very little, but something) rather than just be annoying. Audrey is just a bitch the whole movie. When her and Nick finally appear on screen together we find out that she left Nick without saying anything at all. Was he a jerk? Was he too into his work? We never find out, so the audience can only assume it was because she's a bitch. Oh and she steals Nick's Top Secret video of exposition and gets him kicked out of the whole operation by putting it on the news for a promotion. Again, Bitch.

I can't even defend the pure popcorn elements. The action is dull and uninvolving. The action of a Transformers movie is at the very least, visually stunning and visceral.

Final note: This movie sucks so bad even the Siskel and Ebert joke lacks imagination. I'm not jumping on the critic bandwagon or anything but I find it hilarious that the real duo went on air to say how lame of an attempt it was to put them down, as Godzilla didn't eat them.

Another Sandler trainwreck. I like some of the guy's movies but lately his smugness has become too much for me to handle. Case in point: Just Go with It. Does Adam Sandler really think he plays likable human beings?

Just a bit irritating, but it gave me a few chuckles. The climax of the movie is completely insane in an '80s soap opera way. Its actually somewhat enjoyable.

I only kinda hate this movie. It's too smug and sure of itself as an entry in the franchise and so much of the whole concept of this movie is wasted. It doesn't even go for the full-on insanity of the Transformers sequels, it's just pretending to be more than it is, but it's not even better than T3.