My Least Favorite Films of 2013
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- DirectorJohn LuessenhopStarsAlexandra DaddarioTania RaymondeScott EastwoodA young woman travels to Texas to collect an inheritance. Little does she know that an encounter with a chainsaw-wielding killer is part of the reward.
- DirectorElizabeth BanksSteven BrillSteve CarrStarsEmma StoneStephen MerchantRichard GereA series of interconnected short films follows a washed-up producer as he pitches insane story lines featuring some of the biggest stars in Hollywood.A film with the most talented cast, but a film of wasted time, potential, and mentioning. So I'm just going to stop.
- DirectorJohn MooreStarsBruce WillisJai CourtneySebastian KochJohn McClane travels to Russia to help out his seemingly wayward son, Jack, only to discover that Jack is a CIA operative working undercover, causing the father and son to team up against underworld forces.Virtually killed the Die Hard franchise. Way to go!
- DirectorMalcolm D. LeeDavid ZuckerStarsSimon RexAshley TisdaleCharlie SheenA couple begin to experience some unusual activity after bringing their lost nieces and nephew home. With the help of home-surveillance cameras, they learn they're being stalked by a nefarious demon.
- DirectorRaja GosnellStarsNeil Patrick HarrisJayma MaysKaty PerryThe Smurfs team up with their human friends to rescue Smurfette, who has been abducted by Gargamel, since she knows a secret spell that can turn the evil sorcerer's newest creation, creatures called "The Naughties", into real Smurfs.
- DirectorJimmy HaywardStarsWoody HarrelsonOwen WilsonDan FoglerA pair of turkeys discover a time machine and decide to use it to travel to the first Thanksgiving, to take turkeys off the menu forever.
- DirectorCal BrunkerStarsBrendan FraserSarah Jessica ParkerJessica AlbaAstronaut Scorch Supernova finds himself caught in a trap when he responds to an SOS from a notoriously dangerous alien planet, Earth.
- DirectorBarry CookNeil NightingaleStarsCharlie RoweKarl UrbanAngourie RiceSee and feel what it was like when dinosaurs ruled the Earth, in a story where an underdog dino triumphs to become a hero for the ages.This film could have been really good if they didn't do one thing: make them talk. Whoever made that choice needs to be fired.
- DirectorM. Night ShyamalanStarsJaden SmithDavid DenmanWill SmithA crash landing leaves Kitai Raige and his father Cypher stranded on Earth, a millennium after events forced humanity's escape. With Cypher injured, Kitai must embark on a perilous journey to signal for help.
- DirectorGore VerbinskiStarsJohnny DeppArmie HammerWilliam FichtnerNative American warrior Tonto recounts the untold tales that transformed John Reid, a man of the law, into a legend of justice.
- DirectorDennis DuganStarsAdam SandlerKevin JamesChris RockAfter moving his family back to his hometown to be with his friends and their kids, Lenny finds out that between old bullies, new bullies, schizo bus drivers, drunk cops on skis, and four hundred costumed party crashers sometimes crazy follows you.At this point I'm over Adam Sandler.
- DirectorCourtney SolomonStarsEthan HawkeSelena GomezJon VoightTo save his kidnapped wife, Brent Magna must drive at the orders of a mysterious man.Selena Gomez can't act...plain and simple.