Her Majesty, Love (1931)

W.C. Fields: Bela Toerrek - Lia's Father

Quotes 

• Lia's Father : [On the phone]  Who's him? Eh, he? Who is he? I see, him and he are the same. I think you are a little bit tipsy... It's a very good omen for marriage. I was half-stewed when I proposed to your mother.

• Lia Toerrek : This is my father.

  Lia's Father : Yes, if you don't mind.

  Fred von Wellingen : I'm glad to meet you, father.

  Lia's Father : That's the first time I've ever been called father by a strange man.

• Fred von Wellingen : Come on, Dad. We'll put you at the family table for the present.

  Lia's Father : Oh, am I gonna get a present?

• Lia's Father : [Toast]  Here's to your liver!

• Lia Toerrek : Dad, you know you shouldn't drink cognac.

  Lia's Father : Hey, I only had four or five. They weren't any bigger than thimbles. All this fuss about a little cognac.

  Lia Toerrek : I'm not going to argue with you, not anything works.

  Lia's Father : What am I - a mad dog or something? Listen, Lia, I resent this very much. Whose your father here? You or me?

• Lia Toerrek : Dad, what am I going to do with you?

  Lia's Father : Take me where there's more cognac.

• Lia's Father : He's a great catch. He's rich. He's old. What more do you want?

• Lia's Father : Don't apologize, my lord. A mistake is a mistake. When I was in Vaudeville, once my assistant handed me a porcupine instead of a rabbit.