Scram! (1932)

Arthur Housman: Drunk

Photos 

Quotes 

• Oliver : What's the matter, neighbor?

  Drunk : I los' the key to my car.

  Stanley Laurel : Can't you find it?

  Drunk : No. Thas' why I'm lookin'.

• Oliver : [Stan and the Drunk have fallen into the open sewer. Before Ollie can help them out, a patrolling officer approaches]  Shh, here comes a policeman.

  Drunk : Fell down the grating.

  [Stan shushes him] 

  Drunk : Oh pfffffffbt!

  [the policeman thinks Ollie blew a raspberry at him and whacks him on the shoulder with his truncheon] 

  Stanley Laurel : [whispers]  It's a policeman.

  Drunk : A policeman? Pfffffffffbt!

  [Enraged, the policeman chases Ollie around the block] 

• Drunk : My room is upstairs to the left. Now, you palsies go and make yourself comfortable. I'll go and put the car away and then I'll make a little drink.

• Drunk : Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.

  Hawkins - the Butler : Might I ask what you're doing here?

  Drunk : Isn't this my house?

  Hawkins - the Butler : It certainly is not!

  Drunk : ...Ooh, maybe I better go then.

  Hawkins - the Butler : Maybe you had!