$ (1971)
Scott Brady: Sarge
Quotes
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Sarge : I can't believe this. You're a heavyweight to pull off a million dollar caper, but foolish enough to get caught by a lightweight hustler like me?
Joe Collins : Million-and-a-half, Sarge. One million and a half. That's how much that Dawn and I took from yours and the two other bank boxes.
Sarge : Where is Dawn? Where is she?
Joe Collins : Now?
Sarge : Right now!
Joe Collins : Gee, it looks like... she's where the money is!
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Sarge : [in an irritable voice as he disgustedly watches the Candy Man lean back and forth and crane his neck in various directions and climb around to look on different sides of the closet walls and tap the panelling with his knuckles] What're ya BUILDIN'?
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Sarge : [seeing that Miss Devine is exiting the booth that he was planning to go into] Hey - - what're you doing in there?
Dawn Divine : [flashing a bright mischievous smile and replying in a pretend furtive whisper] Robbing a bank!
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[the battered and bloodied Candy Man enters while the Sarge is beating up the Major over the stolen money]
Candy Man : Let him go! He doesn't have the money.
Sarge : What do you know about it?
Candy Man : My box got hit too.
Sarge : You're kidding! All 'em boxes at the bank got hit?
Candy Man : Not all.
Sarge : Only us?
Candy Man : People like us.
Sarge : What the hell do I have to do with you? Look at yourself! You're up shit creek without a paddle.
Candy Man : You're in the same boat.
Sarge : Not me! I'm not connected with you in any way.
Candy Man : Can you go to the police and report it? Huh?
Major : He's right.
Sarge : You shut up! The Candy Man's right. Whoever it was, if we can't call a cop... neither can they. Okay, Mr. Candy Man, you're the brains here. Who?
[the Candy Man suddenly sees a photo of Dawn Divine and the Sarge together and he recognizes her]
Candy Man : When we know how... we'll know who.
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[with the Candy Man and the Major looking on, Sarge is on the phone with Mr. Kessell trying to get Joe's home address]
Sarge : [into the phone; cheerful tone] So anyway, I go to the hotel to get my baggage and it isn't here.
[pause]
Sarge : Yeah, those stupid mothers never put it on the connecting plane to Munich. Now get this, my address book is inside the missing suitcase. So here we are with no way to contact my old friend Joe without knowing where he lives.
Mr. Kessel : [into the phone] His number is not listed. I don't like to give out private numbers. But if you have his phone number anyway why...
Sarge : [into the phone; cutting Kessel off] No, no, I can't phone him because that way we can't suprise him.
Mr. Kessel : [into the phone] Surprise him?
Sarge : [into the phone] Yeah, it's sort of a... going away party. Didn't Joe tell you anything?
Mr. Kessel : [into the phone] I only know that tomorrow is his last day at the bank. All right.
Sarge : [into the phone as he writes down the address] Yeah, go ahead. Fifty-six, what? Uh... yeah, I got it. Well, thanks a million pal. Good bye.
[Sarge hangs up and then rises to his feet to face the Candy Man and the Major]
Sarge : [serious tone] Let's go to a surprise party.
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[Sarge has his gun on Joe in the train cabin]
Sarge : [as he takes away Joe's suitcase] Stay where you are! Up! You ought to be ashamed at yourself. Jesus, boy... you work for the bank! You're supposed to protect their money!
[feels around the suitcase]
Sarge : All right, where's the key?
[Joe laughs slightly]
Sarge : The key!
Joe Collins : [continuing to laugh] Uh... you're not going to believe this...
Sarge : That's right!
[Sarge pulls out a switchblade knife and cuts into the suitcase cutting open a large hole, he feels inside and pulls out a bottle of champaigne and throws the suitcase back at Joe who has stopped laughing]
Sarge : Count it!
Joe Collins : Well, I know how much there is. Your share is...
[Joe is suprised when he pulls out of the cut open suitcase crumbled newspaper with fish wrapped up in it]
Joe Collins : Uh... Sarge? We've been had!
Sarge : Shut up.
Joe Collins : As I said, your share of this is around $765,000.
Sarge : Shut up!
Joe Collins : What? You think I lugged this goddamn thing across Germany just for the exercise?
Sarge : SHUT UP!
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Sarge : That's the trouble with you American broads: no damn gratitude!
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Sarge : I got a proposition for you. Equals. Partners. You take us to the broad, we divide the loot. 70 - 30.
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Sarge : Oh, boy. That is really something. Huh! When a Kraut junkie don't even trust the United States frickin' Army! Oh, that is really something.
