Carry on Matron (1972)

Hattie Jacques: Matron

Photos 

Quotes 

• Matron : [handing Sir Bernard envelopes]  By the way - your mail.

  Sir Bernard Cutting : Yes, I am! And I can prove it, d'you hear! Prove it!

• Matron : I'm a simple woman with simple tastes, and I want to be wooed!

  Sir Bernard Cutting : Ooh, you can be as 'wude' as you like with me!

• Mr. Tidey : Well, what's happened?

  Matron : I'm afraid it was another false alarm, Mr Tidey. You may as well go back to work.

  Mr. Tidey : Go back to work? It was due three weeks ago.

  Mr. Tidey : Well I'm sorry but babies tend to arrive when they feel like it. There's nothing we can do about it.

  Mr. Tidey : That's a fine state of affairs, innit eh? We'd soon be in a right old mess if we ran the railways like that.

  Matron : I was under the impression that you did.