Death Race 2000 (1975)

Don Steele: Junior Bruce

Photos 

Quotes 

• Junior : All right, all right, and yes sirree! A clean hit! A perfect hit! And no pain for the target. Too bad the guy was only 38; just two years older, he'd have been worth three times the points.

• Junior : Here he comes: Machine Gun Joe! Loved by thousands, hated by millions!

• Junior : Frankenstein scores! Frankenstein scores at last! But what kind of a score, boys and girls? Just 80 points out of a possible big 700. What do you think, Gracie?

  Grace Pander : Well, those doctors - dear friends of mine - have been pretty smug all these years setting up the old folks. Frankenstein must have decided it was their turn.

  Harold : Which only goes to show that even the fearsome Frankenstein has a 100 percent red-blooded American sense of humor, heh-heh.

• Junior : [swearing]  Chrysler!

• Junior : Frankenstein! Frankenstein the legend, Frankenstein the indestructible! Sole survivor of the titanic pile-up of '95, only two-time winner of the Transcontinental Road Race... Frankenstein! Ripped up, wiped out, battered, shattered, creamed, and reamed... a dancer on the brink of death... Frankenstein, who lost a leg in '98, an arm in '99! With half a face and half a chest, and all the guts in the world, he's back!

• Junior : Well, America, there you have it, Frankenstein has just been attacked by the French Air Force and he's whipped their derrieres!

• Junior : Joe doesn't look too happy, but you just can't keep those Frankenstein fans down.

  Machine Gun Joe VeTurbo : Lousy sons of bitches! Frankenstein...

  Myra : Give it to 'em, Joe!

  [she hands Joe a Thompson submachine gun] 

  Machine Gun Joe VeTurbo : Frankenstein! You want Frankenstein? I'll give you Frankenstein!

  [Joe opens fire into the stands] 

  Machine Gun Joe VeTurbo : Aarrgh!

• [Opening scene: the United Provinces of America's version of "The Star-Spangled Banner" is playing at the fictional New York Memorial Raceway] 

  [first lines] 

  Deacon : O great American multitude and sports fans everywhere, today we inaugurate the 20th Annual Trans-Continental Road Race. Today, the five bravest young men and women in this greatest of nations will risk their lives in the greatest sporting event since the days of Spartacus! Three days hence, a new American champion will be crowned for all the world to behold, in awe, in respect, in fear!

  Junior : All right, all right! This is Junior Bruce, your buddy-buddy and mine. And I'll be giving you the blow-by-blow, play-by-play when the kings and queens of the open road roar onto the track!

• Junior : Do I hear the sounds of engines? It's Calamity Jane Kelly, queen of the road, at the wheel of that mean, ornery stud bull!

  [Calamity Jane's fans start to cheer] 

  Junior : Zany Janey, winner of this year's trials at Watkins Glen, placed second in 1998 and led in last year's second lap until she went out with gear trouble.

  [Jane and her navigator, Pete, wave to her fans, while Junior Bruce walks toward them] 

  Junior : Her fans and lovers everywhere wish Janey better luck this year.

  Calamity Jane : My fans can wish me all the luck they want. My luck with my lovers gets any better, I'll miss the race completely. Isn't that right, Pete?