José Ferrer: Leopold
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Quotes
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Leopold : Come now, gentlemen. Am I to be over-praised merely for the accomplishments of being a civilized human?
Bearded Professor : And what after the wedding, Leopold?
Leopold : We are only having one week of leisure; which we will spend in London. A long waited opportunity to show her Thomas Carlyle's grave. Following that, we depart for the Continent, where I have - eh - consented to give a series of lectures on Renaissance art. It will be a pleasure to bring Tintoretto into perspective for his innumerable sycophants.
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Maxwell : So, how did you and Leopold meet?
Ariel : We were both tourists at St. Peter's in Rome.
Maxwell : You picked her up at the Vatican, Leopold?
Ariel : My whole life I wanted to see the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.
Leopold : I met her in the Basilica before one of the lesser Madonnas. I couldn't resist the impulse to speak with this heavenly creature.
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Leopold : When prehistoric man roamed these very woods, naked and savage.
Dulcy : You mean the good old days?
Leopold : Yes! You think you'd like to see some long-haired neanderthal, his primitive weapon in hand, stalking through the brush like an animal, never dreaming that someday he will be extinct and *culture* will be the order of the day.
Dulcy : Well, I'd like to try it for one night.
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Dulcy : I couldn't sleep. So, I came downstairs to read The Katzenjammer Kids.
Leopold : Katzenjammer Kids? That's extraordinary. That's what happened in the dream.
Dulcy : What dream?
Leopold : Just now. Before I awoke. I was dreaming this.
Dulcy : Me?
Leopold : Precisely this! This is incredible. We were alone and you were lying across a sofa and you were reading and I asked you what and you said, "Katzenjammer Kids." And I thought it was funny. And then, your robe fell open, slightly. Only slightly. The way it is now. And I was taken with a great erotic fervor. And all the terrible thoughts of my whole life, that I'd been afraid to unleash, poured forth.
Dulcy : How did I react?
Leopold : Then you pressed your lips to mine and then the scene changed. And we were two savages in the wilderness. It was a prehistoric era. And I was a neanderthal, hunting my enemies with primitive weapons, and loving you uninhibitedly!
Dulcy : Jesus, what did you eat before you went to bed?
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[first lines]
Leopold : Ghosts or little spirits or pixies, I don't believe in them. Do you Mr. Foxx?
Student Foxx : No, sir.
Leopold : You sounded, with all your metaphysical gibberish.
Student Foxx : Well, I didn't mean ghosts or spirits, professor.
Leopold : Nothing is real, but experience. That which can be touched, tasted felt, or in some scientific fashion proved. We must never substitute qualitative events that are marked by similar properties and reoccurrences for fixed substances.
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Leopold : Metaphysical philosophers are simply men who are too weak to accept the world as it is. Their theories of the so-called mysteries of life, are nothing more than projections of their own inner uneasiness. Apart from this world, there are *no* realities.
Student : But, that leaves many basic human needs - unanswered.
Leopold : I'm sorry. I did not create the cosmos, I merely explain it.
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Professor : Is is boorish of me to ask you to inscribe your books?
Leopold : Not at all.
Professor : I agree with you about Balzac, Leopold. He's vastly overrated.
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Dulcy : I've been to Paris twice; but, I was miserable both times. Probably because I was there with the wrong person.
Ariel : Oh, that's - that's important. Because, it's such a romantic place. If two people are really in love, a city like Paris becomes a great medium for which to explore their feelings. Don't you think, Leopold?
Leopold : I like large cities.
Ariel : Oh, and in the rain! Mmm.
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Adrian : Where will you settle after you marry?
Leopold : I've taken a townhouse near the University. I can't wait for Ariel to meet the professors and their wives. Already I'm the envy of entire faculty. You'll adore Professor Eddy and his wife. They're a very entertaining couple with a kind of a theme to their marriage. You see, he specializes in Dr. Johnson and she teaches Boswell. So, they're an entertaining, amusing couple and I look forward to many wonderful chats.
Adrian : Well, to wonderful chats and Boswell and Johnson and Leopold and Ariel and this summer night and you two, of course...
Dulcy : And Maxwell.
Adrian : And to Dr. Maxwell Jordan.
Andrew : Doctor of high jinks!
Leopold : Of course, to Adrian and Andrew.
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Leopold : There are no ghost, except, in Shakespeare and any of those are more real than many people that I know.
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Leopold : I will not play the cuckold to that medical goat!
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Leopold : Blood? I've drawn blood? Who am I?
