This film makes one wonder what the writer's of this movie were thinking. It is a pure mess, with a totally nonsensical plot and it has to be considered low points in both Dolly's and Sylvester Stallone's careers and both have done others things that are considered bad. The plot of the movie has Dolly making a bet with some guy in New York that runs a country western place that she could make the next person that came along into a better country singer than he had been hiring as of late. The last guy he hired though was the funniest thing in the movie and is the highlight as he sings a song about his beloved who died rather tragically. That to me was just great, the rest of the movie however is not and at times is very painful to watch as the next guy she sees is Sylvester Stallone's character and Sylvester can not sing in the beginning of the movie nor the end. The bet is that Dolly would have to sleep with the owner of the place which is a rather perverse bet for a PG movie and is oddly inappropriate. So you get to see her take Sylvester and to the south and try to turn him into a country music star which like I said is painful because you just do not want to hear him sing. The only other part that is sort of funny is when he is exchanging insults right before a show in the southern town. Though that pork chop insult really would have worked better for the other guy, this movie sadly will only work for a few people.
67 Reviews
Sylvester loses his way...
The_Movie_Cat23 June 2012
Warning: Spoilers
Rhinestone isn't such a bad film. In fact, I nearly gave it an average mark. Yet there's just one too many broad comedy moments (the howling dogs alone is worth a loss of a mark) and Stallone is just too self- consciously "comedic" at points, a clear indication of why his return to comedy movies seven years later was destined to never really take off.
Yet there are some genuinely amusing moments in this film, and, while far from spectacular, it's probably stronger than the current 3.2 rating would attest. But where Rhinestone is significant is that it's almost the first sign of Stallone really losing his way.
To this point his was still producing creditable work, and if early 80s pieces like Escape To Victory were slight misfires, his performance in First Blood showed an actor who still wanted to act, rather than react. But in 1983 the star was paid half a million dollars to place Brown & Williamson products within five of his films, and such an ethically questionable decision presaged a huge drop in his work. This was followed by directing a sequel to Saturday Night Fever, the narcissistic and pointless Staying Alive.
While Rhinestone is okay if far from spectacular, it was followed by turning both of his most famous characters into cartoonesque jokes, a failed new character in the shape of the ludicrous Cobra and a laughably bad arm wrestling movie in Over The Top. He saw out the decade with okayish features in Lock Up/Tango and Cash, but the star who entered the 80s as a genuinely worthwhile actor left that same decade as something of a joke.
Yet there are some genuinely amusing moments in this film, and, while far from spectacular, it's probably stronger than the current 3.2 rating would attest. But where Rhinestone is significant is that it's almost the first sign of Stallone really losing his way.
To this point his was still producing creditable work, and if early 80s pieces like Escape To Victory were slight misfires, his performance in First Blood showed an actor who still wanted to act, rather than react. But in 1983 the star was paid half a million dollars to place Brown & Williamson products within five of his films, and such an ethically questionable decision presaged a huge drop in his work. This was followed by directing a sequel to Saturday Night Fever, the narcissistic and pointless Staying Alive.
While Rhinestone is okay if far from spectacular, it was followed by turning both of his most famous characters into cartoonesque jokes, a failed new character in the shape of the ludicrous Cobra and a laughably bad arm wrestling movie in Over The Top. He saw out the decade with okayish features in Lock Up/Tango and Cash, but the star who entered the 80s as a genuinely worthwhile actor left that same decade as something of a joke.
As Bad As They Say
davidkennedy-9108715 July 2020
Rhinestone has been one of those notorious flops I'd always heard about like Glitter or Showgirls that you just had to see to believe. Now that I've seen it, I can safely say that they were right. Unfortunately, Rhinestone isn't some hidden gem that just had the misfortune of bad marketing, cruel reviews, or being ahead of its time - it's truly terrible.
The story has Dolly Parton as a country western singer in NYC who's desperate to get out of a contract she's locked herself into with a sleazy Ron Liebman. In order to do this, they wager a bet that she can't turn a regular Joe off the street into a "rhinestone cowboy." They pick dimwitted cabbie Sylvester Stallone and it becomes apparent that Parton has her work cut out for her.
In typical rom com fashion, Parton and Stallone strike up somewhat of a romance, but the main issue is that they have very little chemistry together. Stallone seems miscast from the get go. He doesn't have a funny or musical bone in this body and most of the film shows Parton struggling to get him to lighten up and it's very uncomfortable to watch. Perhaps if there'd been a different leading man, this would have worked since the concept isn't horrible.
Parton proves again that she's a natural on screen and she's enjoyable even when the film isn't.
The story has Dolly Parton as a country western singer in NYC who's desperate to get out of a contract she's locked herself into with a sleazy Ron Liebman. In order to do this, they wager a bet that she can't turn a regular Joe off the street into a "rhinestone cowboy." They pick dimwitted cabbie Sylvester Stallone and it becomes apparent that Parton has her work cut out for her.
In typical rom com fashion, Parton and Stallone strike up somewhat of a romance, but the main issue is that they have very little chemistry together. Stallone seems miscast from the get go. He doesn't have a funny or musical bone in this body and most of the film shows Parton struggling to get him to lighten up and it's very uncomfortable to watch. Perhaps if there'd been a different leading man, this would have worked since the concept isn't horrible.
Parton proves again that she's a natural on screen and she's enjoyable even when the film isn't.
Good Lord...I Actually Kinda Enjoyed This...
MetalGeek23 February 2007
I remember RHINESTONE's extremely short tenure in theaters when I was a teenager but never saw the film until it turned up unexpectedly on Country Music Television (CMT) earlier this week. I sat down expecting to laugh AT the movie, not WITH it, because on paper, the idea of Sylvester Stallone learning to become a country singer so that Dolly Parton can win a bet with her sleazy manager sounds like a train wreck of Biblical proportions. But y'know what? In spite of myself I found myself chuckling at the screwball humor in RHINESTONE. Stallone is not exactly known for his comedic stylings, but I have to give him credit, he gave it the old college try in his role as a mumble-mouthed NYC cabbie who tries hard to discover his inner redneck. Dolly Parton, well, she's Dolly Parton. She made quite a few movies in the late 70s and early 80s and though she may not be considered a great actress, she's light, funny, and easy on the eyes as well. Some of the priceless moments include Sly's fringed, sparkly stage wear (which wouldn't have looked out of place in the Blue Oyster Bar of "Police Academy" fame), Dolly punching out Tim Thomerson (Jack Deth would be horrified at how easily she took him out!), and Sly's race through the mean streets of 1984 Times Square on horseback to rescue Dolly from her manager's clutches. On the musical side, well, let's just say I doubt that the soundtrack album to RHINESTONE burned up the charts back in '84. Dolly can sing anything and make it sound good, so Sly should be grateful that she joins him on stage in the big finale to salvage his "performance" (and I use that term loosely). I doubt Sly Stallone looks back on this movie with much fondness, but considering that I was expecting a total cheese fest I was pleasantly surprised by this fluffy '80s comedy. They really don't make'em like this anymore.
"He has been compared to Marlin Brando, Robert De Niro and Al Pacino"
diamondgroup20 July 2005
The above quote was from a old trailer, which ran incessantly on TV, plugging the first " Rocky" movie, which was truly excellent. It refers, of course, to our hero, "Nick Martinelli", aka Sylvester Stallone. Whether a series of "Nick Martinelli" films, ala "Rocky" and "Rambo", was planned I do not know. I imagine that the various Italian American image organizations would have bridled at the thought, since this character did for Italians in this country what Steppin Fechitt accomplished for black people. They should have put together a trailer for this film stating, "He has been compared to Shemp Howard, Pinky Lee, and Rags Raglan." When Dolly Parton takes the acting honors in a film that you appear in, Sylvester, then the Marlin Brando comparisons were probably premature. There are two types of really bad movies, and it is really not fair to mix them together. Movies like "Manos" and the "Roller Blade Seven" are pure garbage, and they were intended to be. The filmmakers had no money, no talent and no discernible script (or the ability to obtain one)to work with. They produced a piece of trash. It is inevitable, like night follows day. The people who rent the tape or CD know it's junk. Their friends even tell them that it's miserable nonsense before they see it. They don't care. It's like sticking your tongue into a cavity. Your going to do it anyway; you don't care if it hurts. That's what makes this type of bad movie much worse-- Somebiody was trying to make this good!! They had so-called "Big Name, High Profile" talent, a large budget to work with, and I presume competent script writers and directors. Didn't anybody actually look at the "rushes" of this film, or did Stallone's STAR power intimidate everybody.One look at he scene where Stallone is singing (horribly) and bobbing up and down in that Reservation Indian hat should have been enough to stop the whole project in its tracks."Lets start over. I think we can work up a new plot line where the rednecks push the city kid too far. They try to bath him and give him a short haircut. He escapes to his taxi and starts to run everybody over. He makes it to the singing engagement just in time to see Dolly get raped by her manager. He kills him and blows up the whole town. Richard Crenna is a country record promoter and he flies in from Nashville to extract Nick. A little similar to something else, but it will work." "He has been compared to Hugh O'Brien, Sonny Tufts and Morgan Fairchild."
"Freddie, there are two kinds of people in this world--and you ain't one of 'em!"
moonspinner5510 November 2008
Never mind that "Rhinestone" already looks like a dated relic from another century...it was a very poor picture in its day, and time has not been kind to it. Country crooner Dolly Parton takes a bet (singing five more years at sleazy Ron Leibman's rowdy roadhouse) that she can turn obnoxious cab-driver Sylvester Stallone into a "Rhinestone Cowboy". That's the whole plot, really; the rest of it (ogling bar-owner Liebman, the budding romance between the two stars) is inconsequential. Bob Clark directed, shamefully. There's practically no action--just mouthing off--and even Parton's grounded, natural effervescence is discarded for the sake of extremely cheap laughs. It's a movie purposefully targeted at yahoos (who else would even want to see it, aside from Dolly-addicts?). Still, it's an insulting come-on to crowds of even the lowest denomination, and the smugness (especially on Stallone's part) is insufferable. NO STARS from ****
Incredibly awful.
bdavis-53 January 2002
Warning: Spoilers
1/10. If IMDb could go lower, then I might. "Rhinestone" is the worst movie that I have ever seen. Unfortunately, it's not at that level of bad at which you can enjoy the campy idiocy of all of it, like "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" might be. It has just enough Hollywood production value to make it unendurable. I liked the song on which it is "based", I usually like Sylvester Stallone and Dolly Parton as stars, and I love Richard Farnsworth as a character actor. Therefore, I am baffled about this hideous waste of time and talent - and let there be no doubt about the extent of the hideousness. I can only conclude that any positive reviews out there in this world are sarcastic, or from people who are unfamiliar with Hollywood movies, or from people with bad taste, or are simply beyond my understanding at this time. This review deserves more scorn than my powers of sarcasm can conjure. *** Spoilers Follow - But They're More Entertaining Than The Movie *** Imagine the continuous mediocrity and boredom of an unlikely romance with no chemistry culminating into the mighty crescendo of a horrible, horrible, karaoke-quality song by Stallone. What makes that performance notorious and infamous for all like me who witnessed it was that it was clearly meant to be the triumphant climax of the saga of a hard-working, underdog hero, in the style of "Rocky". I can tell you that "Rhinestone" is to blame for a traumatic childhood memory. I was a teenager visiting my aged great uncle and aunt with several others in order to spend some precious family time. After dinner, we started watching the video with reasonable hopes, knowing that my Great Uncle Bob enjoys western music. All of us dutifully forced ourselves through to the end, but even the complacent Bob trashed the movie as soon as it was over. Even though I hadn't picked it in the video store, I felt guilty and dirty through participation, as if we had accidentally watched "Deep Throat".
This is what Hollywood does
kevdoggy14 April 2004
So Stabone wanted to depart from his usual toughguy persona, and do some comedy. That's what Dolly does. Since they are both big stars with big box office, a couple of producers said "Hey, how about if we set this up so Dolly says she'll make the next guy who walks in the door a country western singer, and Stabone, the New York cabbie walks in! Bingo, fish out of water meets My Fair Lady!"
Small problem. Stabone, despite all of the studio tricks in the world, and songs written to limit his need to actually sing, is absolutely the worst singer on earth. And I imagine on the set, because Stabone is Stabone, nobody told him. I'm guessing they said "sounds great, Sly"! And "you're as good as Frank (Stabone)".
When Stabone "sings", it sounds actually like he is gruffly saying "Ruh Ruh Ruh" into the microphone. Then, Dolly and her friends say "Wow, he's great!", which seems unlikely. The script is filled out with some incredibly lame jokes, delivered by Stabone, who, in addition to not being a singer, is also not a comedic actor. There is also some sort of romance supposedly blooming between Stabone and Dolly, which again seems somewhat unlikely, because he is a young handsome in-shape dude, and she is some sort of weird huge-bosomed southern anomaly, possibly created in a laboratory.
I would like to see this shown in midnight movies. I believe it would draw great raucous crowds who would come back week after week. After that, perhaps a broadway adaptation in 10 years.
Small problem. Stabone, despite all of the studio tricks in the world, and songs written to limit his need to actually sing, is absolutely the worst singer on earth. And I imagine on the set, because Stabone is Stabone, nobody told him. I'm guessing they said "sounds great, Sly"! And "you're as good as Frank (Stabone)".
When Stabone "sings", it sounds actually like he is gruffly saying "Ruh Ruh Ruh" into the microphone. Then, Dolly and her friends say "Wow, he's great!", which seems unlikely. The script is filled out with some incredibly lame jokes, delivered by Stabone, who, in addition to not being a singer, is also not a comedic actor. There is also some sort of romance supposedly blooming between Stabone and Dolly, which again seems somewhat unlikely, because he is a young handsome in-shape dude, and she is some sort of weird huge-bosomed southern anomaly, possibly created in a laboratory.
I would like to see this shown in midnight movies. I believe it would draw great raucous crowds who would come back week after week. After that, perhaps a broadway adaptation in 10 years.
Dolly: big as ever! Sly: short on talent, if not on screen!
drdark2 January 2005
How do they get all the rest of the cast to walk in ruts to make all 5'4" of Sly Stone look like a normal height? What's that troll doing with sweet-faced Dolly anyway? His nose is the only thing bigger than her chest. A miserable excuse for a comedy, and a fine vehicle for proving that Sly has NO comedic acting ability. Bring back "The Lords Of Flatbush", his true element! What a short sack of protoplasm he is! And now, to fill out the 10 line requirement for a review, I will close with a limerick:
There once was a so-called "actor" named Sly.
A short ugly plug of a guy. His ability was smaller Than the cast, all taller Before seeing it again, I'd rather die!
There once was a so-called "actor" named Sly.
A short ugly plug of a guy. His ability was smaller Than the cast, all taller Before seeing it again, I'd rather die!
This should not be a 2.7
the_Poppuns16 June 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Okay it's not that bad. I mean Stallone in that glittery cowboy outfit has to be at least two points in itself. And he doesn't sing that bad either. I've actually watched it more than once. And if it has repeat and some entertainment value it shouldn't be that low. I've seen movies that have been nominated for Academy awards that were less entertaining than this. The story if you don't know is about a country and western singer who has to train a novice in order to get out of her contract with a weasel type producer. The novice in question is a NYC cabbie played by Stallone. So she brings him home with her to the country and has to turn him into a cowboy basically. It's a fish out of water story. Yeah it's not Shakespeare, but it's definitely watchable.
The Corniest "Cornball" Comedy Ever!!
strong-122-47888512 July 2014
While viewing Rhinestone there were 2 specific things that I instantly learnt about Stallone. One - He can't act. And, Two - He can't sing.
Well, actually I know these 2 very obvious things about Stallone, already. (I mean, who doesn't?) - Rhinestone only confirmed them.
Rhinestone is quite deservedly listed as one of the 100 Worst Movies ever made. After having to endure acres, upon acres, of the most unfunny dialogue imaginable, it's clear to see the reason why.
Apparently, Stallone, who had a special "control" clause in his contract, ordered so many changes to the original screenplay (which, of course, allowed him to be in every possible scene), that he ran into all sorts of nasty conflicts with both the Screenwriter, Phil Robinson, and Directer, Bob Clark. Things got so bad that Clark refused to ever work with Stallone again.
Rhinestone's story is basically simple and dumb - Or - Should I just say "simply dumb"?
Jake Farris, an aspiring Country singer in NYC (played by Dolly Parton), makes a bet with her sleazoid boss, Freddy, that she can teach any old nobody to be a singer. And the nobody that Jake picks out as her "trainee" is a real nobody, indeed, named Nick Martinelli, a thoroughly obnoxious nobody NYC cabdriver.
I must say that when it came to playing a thoroughly obnoxious nobody cabdriver, Stallone was, for once, perfectly cast.
As I understand it - Stallone, himself, publicly admitted that Rhinestone was a mistake, being the one film that he regretted ever making. Well, I'm tellin' ya - Stallone isn't the only one who regrets that he made this film - I'm another one, for sure.
Well, actually I know these 2 very obvious things about Stallone, already. (I mean, who doesn't?) - Rhinestone only confirmed them.
Rhinestone is quite deservedly listed as one of the 100 Worst Movies ever made. After having to endure acres, upon acres, of the most unfunny dialogue imaginable, it's clear to see the reason why.
Apparently, Stallone, who had a special "control" clause in his contract, ordered so many changes to the original screenplay (which, of course, allowed him to be in every possible scene), that he ran into all sorts of nasty conflicts with both the Screenwriter, Phil Robinson, and Directer, Bob Clark. Things got so bad that Clark refused to ever work with Stallone again.
Rhinestone's story is basically simple and dumb - Or - Should I just say "simply dumb"?
Jake Farris, an aspiring Country singer in NYC (played by Dolly Parton), makes a bet with her sleazoid boss, Freddy, that she can teach any old nobody to be a singer. And the nobody that Jake picks out as her "trainee" is a real nobody, indeed, named Nick Martinelli, a thoroughly obnoxious nobody NYC cabdriver.
I must say that when it came to playing a thoroughly obnoxious nobody cabdriver, Stallone was, for once, perfectly cast.
As I understand it - Stallone, himself, publicly admitted that Rhinestone was a mistake, being the one film that he regretted ever making. Well, I'm tellin' ya - Stallone isn't the only one who regrets that he made this film - I'm another one, for sure.
I liked this movie
staby18 January 2005
Warning: Spoilers
There are some hilarious moments in this movie. Yeah, I know, Sylvester Stallone as a country singer? But that is one of the things that makes it funny. I love the part where Dolly is trying to teach Sly to speak with a southern accent. I didn't think that he was singing "that badly" by the end of the movie. The dinner scenes in both locations were very funny. Sly playing the organ and singing at the top of his lungs while the funeral was going on was hilarious. And when Sly is walking down the road at night and that creepy guy pulled up and said "get in" had me rolling. Taken for it's entertainment value only, I was very entertained by this movie.
While a box office flop - a hilarious detour for Stallone
tarablevins200314 January 2004
I love this movie. Not because it is a particularly good movie but it definitely leaves a memorable impression. In what other film can you see Sylvester Stallone adorned in a fringed jacket, western shirt, tight pants, chaps, and high heeled cowboy boots? I mean please, who could ask for more? Stallone attempts to sing as well. I have heard worse. Also, the dialog is hilarious. Being from the South, it resonates with the sounds of my youth. Of course, Rhinestone is filled with the obvious stereotypical portrayals of rural residents. However, it is not rude or mean spirited to the populace located below the Mason Dixon line. In a fashion, the movie rather celebrates and embraces those individuals. Believe me, there are some memorable moments to this cinematic adventure. Just give it a chance - spend 111 minutes laughing at Stallone and singing with Dolly. If the more urbane members of my clan can appreciate this film even high brow viewers can participate in parody from time to time.
One of the cheesiest movies ever made
cny_cd21 February 2007
This was by far one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Keep in mind that I'm a huge Stallone and Dolly fan, but the singing and "stage antics" of Stallone in this made me long for Scott Baio's singing career to make a comeback. Stallone basically sings the way he talks, and jumps around and dances on stage like he's hyped up on something. Sly's brother is a good singer, HE ISN'T. Some people should never sing.....EVER. It is actually very hard to watch without actually feeling sorry for him. Dolly must have been mortified once she saw the final product. I'm giving it a two out of ten, simply for the "shock value".......
2 a.m. at the Karaoke Bar
Schlockmeister6 June 2001
This is a genuinely funny movie in parts and that may really be what it was all about and perhaps I should just accept it as such and leave it be. But this movie is so fun to trash! Dolly plays, well... Dolly, as she usually does in every movie she has ever been in. She is poured into impossibly tight outfits and she is indeed formidable. One wonders how she is able to breath in these tight outfits, much less talk and sing. Richard Farnsworth plays old codgers pretty well. Sylvester, steals the show playing a character so unlike anything he had played before (or since in fact). Well, the basic New York/East Coast type of guy seems to be a constant thing, but to take him out of Tennessee and attempt to make him into a country singer? Unfortunately, we see why his singing career never took off, despite his attempts to "sing funny" he sounds like a drunk in a karaoke bar at 2am and moves like he trying to do half-remembered Mick Jagger stage routines.
Funny movie though, his yelling and screaming while playing the organ made me laugh even before the scene's real punchline was revealed.
Recommended if you enjoy getting good looks at Dolly Parton's early 1980s figure and like seeing Stallone make fun of himself. Show this one movie with a selection of his early porn work and make the debacle complete.
Funny movie though, his yelling and screaming while playing the organ made me laugh even before the scene's real punchline was revealed.
Recommended if you enjoy getting good looks at Dolly Parton's early 1980s figure and like seeing Stallone make fun of himself. Show this one movie with a selection of his early porn work and make the debacle complete.
For the sake of humanity, all copies of this movie should be destroyed
hunca-23 February 2009
Quite possibly the worst movie, ever, and way too lame and painful to even be funny. It's so hard to watch Stallone make an utter fool of himself, with his doofus voice ('Duh Duh'), and his weak chin, beaky nose, and bulgy eyes. PAINFUL! How this guy ever got to be Big Box Office is beyond me. I keep wondering how great 'Demolition Man' could have been, with a different male lead, but thankfully, that movie had a fantastic cast and was a solid story.
I know Dolly has a huge fanbase, but all I could think, watching the two of them, was how like clowns they both looked. Overblown, overdone, over-inflated. Thank goodness the ladies coming out of country music now are more 'real'-looking.
The best performance was by Ron Liebman, who plays a slimeball to such a degree that I felt nauseous.
Parton and Stallone have absolutely no chemistry, and the music, such as it is, is horrendously awful. Protect yourself; do not ever watch this movie.
I know Dolly has a huge fanbase, but all I could think, watching the two of them, was how like clowns they both looked. Overblown, overdone, over-inflated. Thank goodness the ladies coming out of country music now are more 'real'-looking.
The best performance was by Ron Liebman, who plays a slimeball to such a degree that I felt nauseous.
Parton and Stallone have absolutely no chemistry, and the music, such as it is, is horrendously awful. Protect yourself; do not ever watch this movie.
"Stay out of my bedroom if you can't take the heat."
utgard1420 June 2014
Dolly Parton makes a bet with her greaseball manager that she can make Sylvester Stallone into a successful country singer. If she wins, he releases her from her contract. If he wins, she sleeps with him. Yeah, gross. Anyway, despite this iffy premise I liked the movie for the most part. Yeah Sly's singing sucked but it was a funny movie with some nice chemistry between Stallone and Parton. At least for the first hour and change. Then it falls apart in the last half-hour when, out of nowhere, Dolly suddenly starts acting like a bitch. Seriously, one scene she and Sly boink and the very next scene she's cutting him down in front of his family and friends and talking about how she's going to boink that scumbag she had the bet with. WTF? Obviously they wanted to separate Dolly and Sly before the climax where they inevitably get back together but this was the worst way possible to do it. Anyway, the movie lost me after that. I still managed to enjoy the ending but not as much. It's better than the IMDb rating and its reputation suggests but it does have big problems.
One of the worst movies I've ever seen
Wendalore7 April 2012
This was on TV the other day. I always love a Pygmalion plot, but getting from here to there was kind of painful. I love Dolly Parton's voice, her appearance and whom she is as a person: SO pretty, so sweet and kind! I could listen to her sing forever! But an actress, she's not! Stallone seemed to be trying to be clever and funny, but he was just so goofy that I found him annoying. Maybe the problem was in the way the character was written? – but no – his facial expressions, his voice, his manner – they were all phony – and when he first showed Dolly how he "sings," it was so loud, unrealistic and silly, I felt embarrassed for him. The plot is contrived, and I kept saying to myself, "Well, they had to do THIS with the plot so THAT funny thing could happen." And Dolly's character, well, she's just Dolly playing a character in a movie. Again, the contrived plot makes her character do unnatural and inconsistent things. I was saying to myself, "Oh no, why are you doing THAT?!" all the time! Well, it IS a "feel good" movie, but in order to "feel good," you must be able to ignore the badly managed plot, poorly depicted characters and silly "acting."
It's not that bad. It's just really awkward
Rodrigo_Amaro19 April 2024
I almost feel bad in joining the band wagon on non-supporters of "Rhinestone" as there's already a large crowd that considers this
one of the worst films ever made. Honestly it's not that bad and for a while it's a manageable little story inspired by those classic
stories where a bet is made to take an ordinary person and turn them into something really special. "Pygmalion",
"My Fair Lady" and "My Man Godfrey" had done that before - and film lovers will be angry that I'm including "Rhinestone" along those marvels.
The concept is the same but move to the craziness of the 1980's, make country star Dolly Parton bet that she can turn a rude taxi driver (Sylvester Stallone) into a country singer, and you get this almost insane picture. All the kinds of laughter can be found here: from ridicule, non-realistic situations, cheap lines and cheap sequences, and some small genuinely funny bits that sadly can't turn a fully incoherent mess into something worthy of a good review.
But it's not all that bad. It's one of those that can actually make you find worth liking it, it's almost good. Stallone and Parton have a somewhat fine chemistry (she's always a fun to watch, I must say); the dramatic song for the tough cowboy singer was incredibly hilarious (they should have sent that song to the Academy to compete in the category and I kid you not, despite the heavy competition); Richard Farnsworth as Dolly's dad was fun to watch as well, just as the guy who plays her drunk ex-boyfriend.
"Rhinestone" major problem was having a script so erratic that it's hard to imagine how on earth this could attract audiences. A country singer meets a taxi driver and they must unite forces to prevent her from having to sleep with her boss, guardian of her lousy contract and... that's the joke? To turn city mouse into an authentic country mouse who can walk and sing like a cowboy and become the new country star of Rhinestone - the club they play. And with a long series of formulaic situations, the story drags on and on. Blame it on Sly for "fixing" newcomer screenwriter Phil Alden Robinson's script (I'll never blame it on him as the legend tells that his original story was highly elevated).
It wasn't a total waste though it felt close to it, becoming dull and boring for a little while. And just to prove it wasn't all that bad, director Bob Clark has a true disaster: Baby Geniuses. Has anyone survived that wreck? I still have traumas. 5/10.
The concept is the same but move to the craziness of the 1980's, make country star Dolly Parton bet that she can turn a rude taxi driver (Sylvester Stallone) into a country singer, and you get this almost insane picture. All the kinds of laughter can be found here: from ridicule, non-realistic situations, cheap lines and cheap sequences, and some small genuinely funny bits that sadly can't turn a fully incoherent mess into something worthy of a good review.
But it's not all that bad. It's one of those that can actually make you find worth liking it, it's almost good. Stallone and Parton have a somewhat fine chemistry (she's always a fun to watch, I must say); the dramatic song for the tough cowboy singer was incredibly hilarious (they should have sent that song to the Academy to compete in the category and I kid you not, despite the heavy competition); Richard Farnsworth as Dolly's dad was fun to watch as well, just as the guy who plays her drunk ex-boyfriend.
"Rhinestone" major problem was having a script so erratic that it's hard to imagine how on earth this could attract audiences. A country singer meets a taxi driver and they must unite forces to prevent her from having to sleep with her boss, guardian of her lousy contract and... that's the joke? To turn city mouse into an authentic country mouse who can walk and sing like a cowboy and become the new country star of Rhinestone - the club they play. And with a long series of formulaic situations, the story drags on and on. Blame it on Sly for "fixing" newcomer screenwriter Phil Alden Robinson's script (I'll never blame it on him as the legend tells that his original story was highly elevated).
It wasn't a total waste though it felt close to it, becoming dull and boring for a little while. And just to prove it wasn't all that bad, director Bob Clark has a true disaster: Baby Geniuses. Has anyone survived that wreck? I still have traumas. 5/10.
Out of His Element
lwmtem12 October 2021
Warning: Spoilers
This was likely the best they could come up with to bring Stallone into the music world without tackling opera with the Three Stooges as backup who qualified because of previous opera experience.
No doubt this never had a serious note, except for Dolly, as one incredible pairing in the sometimes hapless world of entertainment. The vocal performance rival that of John Wayne in an early western. Fortunately that was dubbed.
On this Columbus/Indigenous Peoples day the only way it could be worse would be Stallone as a tribal chief. The ONLY place his voice could have fit would have been F-Troop but that was before his time.
No doubt this never had a serious note, except for Dolly, as one incredible pairing in the sometimes hapless world of entertainment. The vocal performance rival that of John Wayne in an early western. Fortunately that was dubbed.
On this Columbus/Indigenous Peoples day the only way it could be worse would be Stallone as a tribal chief. The ONLY place his voice could have fit would have been F-Troop but that was before his time.
Silly but funny
CharliePecoraro11 January 2009
This film is definitely a goof ball but that is what it set out to be. It's totally farcical & wonderful. Favourite scenes include Steven Apostle Peck who plays Sly's dad. The first is when we meet Peck's character in the organ room & the second is the hilarious scene around the dinner table. I bust a gut watching that scene. So funny.
One important thing I've learned in studying film is that there is a difference between a film you love & a great film. They can be one in the same, as is the case with a film such as The Godfather Part II. This is an masterfully made film that I enjoyed. Or they can be separate. For instance, I recognize that Slumdog Millionaire is a well made film, I just didn't like it. I didn't connect with it. I didn't care what happened. And on the converse, I recognize that Rhinestone isn't really that great a film but I really enjoyed it. I connected with the characters, it made me laugh & I generally found pleasure in it. So I rate it 10/10 for enjoyment.
Love to Steven Peck
One important thing I've learned in studying film is that there is a difference between a film you love & a great film. They can be one in the same, as is the case with a film such as The Godfather Part II. This is an masterfully made film that I enjoyed. Or they can be separate. For instance, I recognize that Slumdog Millionaire is a well made film, I just didn't like it. I didn't connect with it. I didn't care what happened. And on the converse, I recognize that Rhinestone isn't really that great a film but I really enjoyed it. I connected with the characters, it made me laugh & I generally found pleasure in it. So I rate it 10/10 for enjoyment.
Love to Steven Peck
The absolute worst
BandSAboutMovies19 August 2019
Warning: Spoilers
I thought I knew what bad movies were all about, but I never knew it could be like this. Rhinestone achieves a level of bad movie that even I didn't know was possible. It's as if it sets a bar and then continually trips over it, again and again, taking down the talents of Dolly Parton, Sylvester Stallone and Bob Clark in its wake, like an endlessly swirling toilet that has transformed into a black hole where no goodness can escape.
This is the kind of movie that Ed Wood and Claudio Fragrasso would make fun of. In the grand totality of bad movies, this might very well be the worst that I have ever endured. Just imagine that statement - I am someone that has sat through Troll 2 numerous times, has endured multiple Jess Franco movies in one night and has even made it through countless direct to video films that haunted the shelves of Blockbuster and West Coast Video.
How bad can it get? Real bad.
Phil Alden Robinson made his screenwriting debut with this film and luckily, he didn't quit, as he went on to write All of Me and Fletch before writing and directing Field of Dreams and Sneakers. He was so offended by Stallone's rewrite that he briefly considered having his name removed from the film's credits, but was convinced that it would look good on his resume.
Stallone had plenty to say about this film when he spoke to Ain't It Cool News: "The most fun I ever had on a movie was with Dolly Parton on Rhinestone I must tell everyone right now that originally the director was supposed to be Mike Nichols, that was the intention and it was supposed to be shot in New York, down and dirty with Dolly and I with gutsy mannerisms performed like two antagonists brought together by fate. I wanted the music at that time to be written by people who would give it sort of a bizarre edge. Believe it or not, I contacted Whitesnake's management and they were ready to write some very interesting songs alongside Dolly's. But, I was asked to come down to Fox and out steps the director, Bob Clark. Bob is a nice guy, but the film went in a direction that literally shattered my internal corn meter into smithereens. I would have done many things differently. I certainly would've steered clear of comedy unless it was dark, Belgian chocolate dark. Silly comedy didn't work for me. I mean, would anybody pay to see John Wayne in a whimsical farce? Not likely. I would stay more true to who I am and what the audience would prefer rather than trying to stretch out and waste a lot of time and people's patience."
Dolly plays Jake Farris, a country singer stuck in a long-term contract performing at The Rhinestone. She gets into an argument with the club's manager Freddie (Ron Leibman, whose career is one of the highest highs - winning a Tony in 1993 for Angels In America and being in Norma Rae - to the lowest of the lows, being in movies like Michael Winner's Won Ton Ton: The Dog Who Saved Hollywood and the abortive Mad Magazine film, Up the Academy), putting five more years of her contract and a night of sex on the line if she can't turn a regular man off the street into a country star. That said, if she wins, she's out of her contract.
Freddie gets to pick that man and grabs New York cabbie Nick Martinelli (Stallone), who has no talent and hates country. So she takes him home to Tennessee to teach him how to be country. They constantly argue, which is supposed to remind us of the sparkling dialogue of the 1940's romantic comedies, but instead just reminds us how little chemistry two of the biggest stars of the 1970;s have with one another.
Tim Thomerson - yes, Jack Deth from Trancers - shows up as Jake's ex-fiancee Barnett Kale. Richard Farnsworth, who was so magical in Misery and The Straight Story is forced to be in this movie possibly at gunpoint, playing Jake's dad. Actually, I assume that this movie was some sort of SLA terrorist action where everyone had Stockholm Syndrome and had to make this movie and gradually fell into loving what they were doing.
How else can you explain Stallone turning down Beverly Hills Cop and Romancing the Stone to make this movie? They must have had his family, dog and the turtles from Rocky held at gunpoint.
In her autobiography My Life and Other Unfinished Business, Dolly said that the soundtrack for Rhinestone is some of the best work that she has ever one. The song "What a Heartache" is a personal favorite of hers, as she's re-recorded it twice, and the singles "God Won't Get You" and "Tennessee Homesick Blues" topped the country charts.
That said - this movie also features Stallone singing "Drinkenstein." I dare you to make it through this little number with your sanity intact. Here is just a hint of the lyrics in this, well, song:
"Budweiser you created a monster and they call him Drinkenstein. And the tavern down the street is the labba-tor-eye-ee where he makes the transformation all the time!"
This really happened. This was really filmed. This actually exists.
Dolly also utters a line so mystifying that it had to have been written by an alien race: "Freddie, there are two kinds of people in this world, and you ain't one of 'em!"
I have no idea how Bob Clark - the same director behind Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things, Black Christmas, A Christmas Story, Porky's and Deathdream - was behind this movie. Relatedly, I can't even comprehend how Dolly Parton - who I love enough to have seen live on multiple occasions and who has proven herself as an able comedy actress - and Sylvester Stallone - whose movies I've spent weeks of this site discussing - could all be pulled into such a nightmare.
I really can't stop you from watching this movie. In fact, I'll probably watch it again. If you come to my house, I may even suggest that we watch it together. But I've come to realize that I enjoy painful movies. This movie makes the worst regional drive-in movie look like the finest New Hollywood soul searing tearjerker. It makes Manos, The Hands of Fate look like a Frank Capra movie. From here on, when someone asks how bad a movie is, I will use this film as the measuring stick for just how bad it can get.
This is the kind of movie that Ed Wood and Claudio Fragrasso would make fun of. In the grand totality of bad movies, this might very well be the worst that I have ever endured. Just imagine that statement - I am someone that has sat through Troll 2 numerous times, has endured multiple Jess Franco movies in one night and has even made it through countless direct to video films that haunted the shelves of Blockbuster and West Coast Video.
How bad can it get? Real bad.
Phil Alden Robinson made his screenwriting debut with this film and luckily, he didn't quit, as he went on to write All of Me and Fletch before writing and directing Field of Dreams and Sneakers. He was so offended by Stallone's rewrite that he briefly considered having his name removed from the film's credits, but was convinced that it would look good on his resume.
Stallone had plenty to say about this film when he spoke to Ain't It Cool News: "The most fun I ever had on a movie was with Dolly Parton on Rhinestone I must tell everyone right now that originally the director was supposed to be Mike Nichols, that was the intention and it was supposed to be shot in New York, down and dirty with Dolly and I with gutsy mannerisms performed like two antagonists brought together by fate. I wanted the music at that time to be written by people who would give it sort of a bizarre edge. Believe it or not, I contacted Whitesnake's management and they were ready to write some very interesting songs alongside Dolly's. But, I was asked to come down to Fox and out steps the director, Bob Clark. Bob is a nice guy, but the film went in a direction that literally shattered my internal corn meter into smithereens. I would have done many things differently. I certainly would've steered clear of comedy unless it was dark, Belgian chocolate dark. Silly comedy didn't work for me. I mean, would anybody pay to see John Wayne in a whimsical farce? Not likely. I would stay more true to who I am and what the audience would prefer rather than trying to stretch out and waste a lot of time and people's patience."
Dolly plays Jake Farris, a country singer stuck in a long-term contract performing at The Rhinestone. She gets into an argument with the club's manager Freddie (Ron Leibman, whose career is one of the highest highs - winning a Tony in 1993 for Angels In America and being in Norma Rae - to the lowest of the lows, being in movies like Michael Winner's Won Ton Ton: The Dog Who Saved Hollywood and the abortive Mad Magazine film, Up the Academy), putting five more years of her contract and a night of sex on the line if she can't turn a regular man off the street into a country star. That said, if she wins, she's out of her contract.
Freddie gets to pick that man and grabs New York cabbie Nick Martinelli (Stallone), who has no talent and hates country. So she takes him home to Tennessee to teach him how to be country. They constantly argue, which is supposed to remind us of the sparkling dialogue of the 1940's romantic comedies, but instead just reminds us how little chemistry two of the biggest stars of the 1970;s have with one another.
Tim Thomerson - yes, Jack Deth from Trancers - shows up as Jake's ex-fiancee Barnett Kale. Richard Farnsworth, who was so magical in Misery and The Straight Story is forced to be in this movie possibly at gunpoint, playing Jake's dad. Actually, I assume that this movie was some sort of SLA terrorist action where everyone had Stockholm Syndrome and had to make this movie and gradually fell into loving what they were doing.
How else can you explain Stallone turning down Beverly Hills Cop and Romancing the Stone to make this movie? They must have had his family, dog and the turtles from Rocky held at gunpoint.
In her autobiography My Life and Other Unfinished Business, Dolly said that the soundtrack for Rhinestone is some of the best work that she has ever one. The song "What a Heartache" is a personal favorite of hers, as she's re-recorded it twice, and the singles "God Won't Get You" and "Tennessee Homesick Blues" topped the country charts.
That said - this movie also features Stallone singing "Drinkenstein." I dare you to make it through this little number with your sanity intact. Here is just a hint of the lyrics in this, well, song:
"Budweiser you created a monster and they call him Drinkenstein. And the tavern down the street is the labba-tor-eye-ee where he makes the transformation all the time!"
This really happened. This was really filmed. This actually exists.
Dolly also utters a line so mystifying that it had to have been written by an alien race: "Freddie, there are two kinds of people in this world, and you ain't one of 'em!"
I have no idea how Bob Clark - the same director behind Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things, Black Christmas, A Christmas Story, Porky's and Deathdream - was behind this movie. Relatedly, I can't even comprehend how Dolly Parton - who I love enough to have seen live on multiple occasions and who has proven herself as an able comedy actress - and Sylvester Stallone - whose movies I've spent weeks of this site discussing - could all be pulled into such a nightmare.
I really can't stop you from watching this movie. In fact, I'll probably watch it again. If you come to my house, I may even suggest that we watch it together. But I've come to realize that I enjoy painful movies. This movie makes the worst regional drive-in movie look like the finest New Hollywood soul searing tearjerker. It makes Manos, The Hands of Fate look like a Frank Capra movie. From here on, when someone asks how bad a movie is, I will use this film as the measuring stick for just how bad it can get.
some people have no sense of humor
manic9661 April 2005
This is, hands down, one of the funniest movies ever made. Weather we laugh because of the jokes written in or because of how awful some of the movie is, it doesn't matter. Laughter is a good thing, and this movie generates plenty of it. I especially like the bits with the always entertaining Tim Thomerson, Jack Deth of the Trancers series. His turn as Barnett Kale is fantastic. Also showing a nice sense of comedic timing is the inimitable Richard Farnsworth as Noah, the father of Dolly Parton's character.
It is bad, it is cheesy, and it is side-splittingly funny.
And if you cannot appreciate my fashion sense, I resignate.
It is bad, it is cheesy, and it is side-splittingly funny.
And if you cannot appreciate my fashion sense, I resignate.
What's wrong with this one?
PeterJackson29 June 2003
Now, there are lots of films that are total trash, and when I saw the comments and reviews on this one, I thought I was in for a real stinker. Big surprise: I actually laughed several times during this! Dialogue unfunny? I've heard some good stuff here (e.g. the comments by Stallone on his rival Barnett, as well as the dialogue of these two), and you could do a lot worse. And I mean A LOT! Bad acting? Now, Sly will never be an oscar-winner (though he was pretty good in COPLAND), but at least he's likeable. I've never seen Steven Seagal or my fellow countryman JC Van Damme being likeable. Dolly may not be the greatest actress either, but hell, she CAN sing (and I thought I couldn't stand country!)and she's adorable in a way that even reminds me of Marilyn Monroe. Love it when she laughs too. Well, and with support from actors such as Ron Leibman (Razzie nominee? This guy is funny and appropriately slimy)and Richard Farnsworth (THE STRAIGHT STORY, always a pleasure to watch). The singing? Well, if ya like Dolly's singing, there's plenty of it in this film. And Sly ain't that bad either. Not great, but hey, what you expect given the story. This is supposed to sound like this, this ain't the biography of say Garth Brooks! I even liked the macho country singer singing about his girl ending up in pieces (lol).
I know, this ain't the greatest comedy of all times, this ain't a rave review, and people (especially critics) like to make fun of Sly and Dolly. But you can do a lot worse than this and end up with films such as BAD DEFENSE or BATMAN & ROBIN, EXCESS BAGGAGE, SHALLOW HAL or (shudder) BLIND DATE (with Bruce Willis). I was really surprised that I ended up enjoying this, and that I actually laughed a couple of times. The story has almost no surprises, but it ain't terribly cliched either. And that, people, is more than you can say about 90% of the comedies these days. 6/10
I know, this ain't the greatest comedy of all times, this ain't a rave review, and people (especially critics) like to make fun of Sly and Dolly. But you can do a lot worse than this and end up with films such as BAD DEFENSE or BATMAN & ROBIN, EXCESS BAGGAGE, SHALLOW HAL or (shudder) BLIND DATE (with Bruce Willis). I was really surprised that I ended up enjoying this, and that I actually laughed a couple of times. The story has almost no surprises, but it ain't terribly cliched either. And that, people, is more than you can say about 90% of the comedies these days. 6/10
Not Stallone's worst, but could have been better
TheLittleSongbird25 September 2010
I will start off with the good things. Rhinestone is for me not Stallone's worst film, that dishonour goes to Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot, and it is not Bob Clark's worst either, look at the Baby Geniuses movies, both of those make Rhinestone look like Citizen Kane. And I personally liked the music and the scene in the funeral home is hilarious. However, Sly and Dolly Parton have little or no chemistry here, and while Parton brings some vigour Stallone is only so-so. As for his singing, while nothing extraordinary it was actually passable. What I did not like about Rhinestone though was its poor direction, slack pacing, predictable story and awful script, while the cinematography and such are nothing to rave about either. Overall, it isn't the worst film of all time or anything but it should have been much better than it was. 4/10 Bethany Cox
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