Follow That Bird (1985)

Joe Flaherty: Sid Sleaze

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sam Sleaze : Big yellow bird at 1:00.

  Sid Sleaze : Is it that late already?

  Sam Sleaze : It's Air Force talk, you nerf!

• Sam Sleaze : That eight-foot bird is still on the lam. You know, Sid, people would pay money to see that bird.

  Sid Sleaze : Nah, I wouldn't pay to see no bird.

  Sam Sleaze : No, no, no. People would pay us to see that bird! Us, us, us!

• Sam Sleaze : [shouting]  How could you miss him? He's eight feet tall!

  Sid Sleaze : [shouting]  You were going too fast!

  Sam Sleaze : [whispering]  Sid, don't shout at me.

  Sid Sleaze : [whispering]  You were going too fast.

  Sam Sleaze : Let's not get mad. We'll just start all over.

  [shouting] 

  Sam Sleaze : Now let's get going!

• Big Bird : Say, there's a lady named Miss Finch who's chasing me and, uh, do you mind if I hide in your fun fair?

  Sam Sleaze : Why, no, not at all. We have the perfect place for you to hide. Right here in our hiding cage.

  [Locks him up] 

  Sam Sleaze : You'll be safe here.

  Sid Sleaze : Yeah, real safe.

  Big Bird : Gee, thanks.

  [Sid and Sam laugh] 

  Sam Sleaze : Let's go!

  Big Bird : Ha, ha, ha! Oh, gee, I sure am a lucky bird.

• State Trooper : [Picks up the kid that got his apple stolen by Sam Sleaze]  Are these the two men?

  [the kid nods his head] 

  Sam Sleaze : What seems to be the problem, officer? What's the charge?

  State Trooper : [looks through his notebook]  What about counterfeiting, extortion, fraud, impersonating a dentist, stealing an apple from a kid?

  Sam Sleaze : Oh, about that apple, officer, I can explain that. We was just holding it for a friend.

  Sid Sleaze : Yeah, for a friend.

  State Trooper : You can tell that to the judge.

  Sid Sleaze : [crying]  The judge!

  State Trooper : Be a man.

  Sid Sleaze : But I don't wanna be a man, Sam!

  Sam Sleaze : Shut up, Sid! Shut up!

  Sid Sleaze : [crying]  Judge, Sam! Jail!

• Sid Sleaze : Hey look. A haystack.

  [It's actually Big Bird in disguise] 

  Sam Sleaze : We're not looking for haystacks, you chowderhead. Keep your eyes peeled. Big Bird's gotta be around here somewhere.