- Brad: Does your dad still run the newspaper?
- Megan Morgan: I'm a reporter there.
- Brad: Really? Kinda like a "Jimmy Olsen" with breasts.
- Megan Morgan: Brad, You can't go in there. Let's just get help!
- Brad: Who are we gonna call? Critter Busters?
- Critter: [after the hair on it's head is blown off by Lee and it looks at it's reflection] Bitchin'!
- Brad: Look!
- Megan Morgan: Where are they all going?
- Brad: I don't know. Looks like some kind of critter convention.
- Harv: What is this bullshit? Them man-eating dust mops got us roped up tighter than a blue-ribbon bull and all you folks can do is stand here and play kick-the-can with some punk kid!
- Hungry Heifer PA system: At the Hungry Heifer, we won't give you a bum steer.