Sex, Lies, and Videotape (1989)

James Spader: Graham

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Quotes 

• Graham : I remember reading somewhere that men learn to love the person that they're attracted to, and that women become more and more attracted to the person that they love.

• Graham : You're right, I've got a lot of problems... But they belong to me.

  Ann : You think they're yours, but they're not. Everybody that walks in that door becomes part of your problem. Anybody that comes in contact with you. I didn't want to be part of your problem, but I am. I'm leaving my husband, and maybe I would have anyway, but the fact is, is, I'm doing it now, and part of it's because of you. You've had an effect on my life.

  Graham : This isn't supposed to happen. I've spent nine years structuring my life so this didn't happen.

• Ann : So let me see, you said, um, you said that I should never take advice from someone that I haven't had sex with, right... right?

  Graham : Basically.

  Ann : Right. And, uh, *we* haven't had sex...

  [giggle] 

  Ann : right?

  Graham : So...

  Ann : So, I, I, I guess from your own advice, I shouldn't take your advice.

  Graham : I wouldn't.

• John Mullany : I'm sorry?

  Graham : No, it's just, I, you know, I just think - right now I have one key and everything I own is in the car, and I just... I like that, you know? I mean, I just, if I get an apartment, that two keys, if I... get a job, you know, I might have to open or close, that's more keys, you know, buy some stuff, I'm afraid it's gonna get ripped off, or something, and I get more keys, and I just, I, you know, I just like having the one key, it's clean.

  Ann : You're not gonna worry in losing them, I always lose my keys, I hate that.

• Ann : My life is shit. It's just shit. Nothing's what I thought it was. John's a bastard. Let's make a videotape.

  Graham : No, I... ahem... I don't think that's a good idea.

  Ann : Why not?

  Graham : Because I don't think it's a choice that you'd make in a normal frame of mind.

  Ann : And what would you know about a normal frame of mind?

  Graham : That's a good question.

• Cynthia : It's weird thinking about it now. The organ itself seemed like a, a separate thing, um, a separate entity to me. I mean, when he finally pulled it out, and I could look at it and touch it, I completely forgot that there was a guy attached to it. I remember literally being startled when the guy spoke to me.

  Graham : What did he say?

  Cynthia : He said my hand felt good.

  Graham : Then what happened.

  Cynthia : And then I started moving my hand - and then he stopped talkin'.

• Ann : I want to know why you are the way you are!

  Graham : And I'm telling you it's not any one thing that I can point to and say "That's why!" It doesn't work that way with people who have problems, Ann, it's not that neat, it's not hat tidy! It's not a series of little boxes that you can line up and count. Things just don't happen that way.

• Graham : So, I don't... I don't understand, uh, what made you want to come here. I can't imagine Ann painted a very flattering portrait of me.

  Cynthia : Yeah, well, see, um, I don't really listen to Ann when it comes to men. I mean, look at John, for Christ's sake.

• Cynthia : If Ann got freaked out by these, there must be something sexual: are these tapes of you having sex with these girls?

  Graham : No, not exactly.

  Cynthia : Well, either you are or your aren't; which is it?

  Graham : Why don't you let me tape you?

  Cynthia : Doing what?

  Graham : Talking.

  Cynthia : About what?

  Graham : About sex... your sexual history, sexual preferences.

  Cynthia : What makes you think I'd discuss that with you?

  Graham : Nothing.

  Cynthia : Hmm. And you just want to ask me questions?

  Graham : I just want to ask you questions.

  Cynthia : That's all.

  Graham : That's all.

  Cynthia : Is this how you get off or something? Taping women talking about their sexual experiences?

  Graham : Yes.

• Ann : You know, my therapist...

  Graham : You're in therapy?

  Ann : Aren't you?

• Cynthia : [entering Graham's apartment uninvited and unannounced]  I'm Cynthia Bishop

  Graham : [looking confused]  Who?

  Cynthia : [interrupting]  I'm Ann Mullaney's sister

  Graham : The extrovert

  Cynthia : She musta been in a good mood when she said that; she usually calls me 'loud.'

  Graham : She called you that too!

• Ann : I thought about you. Have you thought about me?

  Graham : Yes.

  Ann : What did you think?

  Graham : I thought about what you would look like having an orgasm.

  Ann : I'd like to know what I look like havin' an orgasm. Can you do that?

• Ann : So, all these are... are interviews, huh?

  Graham : Uh, yes.

  Ann : Can we watch one?

  Graham : No, I'd - uh, no.

  Ann : Why not?

  Graham : Well, I... promised each of the subjects that no one would see the videotapes except for me.

  Ann : What are the interviews about?

  Graham : The interviews are about sex.

  Ann : Sex? What about sex?

  Graham : Everything about sex.

  Ann : Like what?

  Graham : What they've done. What they do. What they want to do; but, are afraid to ask for. What they wouldn't do even if asked.

• [last lines] 

  Ann : I think it's gonna rain.

  Graham : [chuckles]  It is raining.

  Ann : Yeah.

• Cynthia : I was eight years old, and, um, Michael Green, who was also eight, asked if he could watch me take a pee... And I said he could if I could watch him take one, too. So we went to the woods behind my house. And I got this feeling he was chickenin' out cos he kept sayin' "Ladies first!" So I pulled down my little panties and urinated, and he ran away before I even finished.

  Graham : Was it a topic of conversation between you after that?

  Cynthia : No! He kind of avoided me for the rest of the summer, and then his family moved away... To Cleveland, actually.

  Graham : What a shame. When did you finally see a penis?

  Cynthia : When I was 14.

  Graham : So, what'd you think? Was it what you expected it to be?

  Cynthia : No. Not really. I - I didn't - I sort of pictured it - um - I didn't think it would have - veins or ridges or anything. I just thought it would be smooth like a test-tube.

• Graham : Do you have orgasms?

  Ann : I don't think so. I mean, I guess, since I'm not sure, that I've never had one.

• Graham : I'm impotent.

  Ann : You're what?

  Graham : Impotent.

  Ann : You are?

  Graham : Yeah, well, I can't - I can't get an erection - in the presence of another person. So, for all practical purposes, I'm impotent.

  Ann : Does that bother you?

  Graham : No.

  Ann : Does it make you feel - self-conscious?

  Graham : Um, not usually. No, yeah. Yeah, I'm self-conscious. Um, I'm not in the same way you are.

  Ann : Me? Me, you think I'm self-conscious?

  Graham : Well, I've been watching you. You know, I've been watching you. I've watched you eat, you know, I've watched you speak, I've watched you move, and I - I see somebody who is extremely aware of people looking at.

• Graham : So, are you here to - make me feel bad for making her feel bad?

• Ann : Why do these tapes all have women's names on them?

  Graham : Well, I enjoy interviewing women more than men.

• Cynthia : Will anyone else see the tape?

  Graham : Absolutely not. Nobody else sees the tapes except for me.

  Cynthia : How long will it take.

  Graham : Well, that depends on you. One woman used up only three minutes and another used three two hour tapes.

  Cynthia : How do we start?

• Graham : I think John is a liar.

  Cynthia : I think you're right.

• Cynthia : Would you like me to take my skirt off?

  Graham : If you wish.

  [Cynthia removes her skirt] 

  Graham : You're not wearing any underwear.

• Ann : So, where do you get your money from? For rent and - tapes - and stuff like that?

  Graham : Underneath my mattress.

  Ann : And what are you going to do when this money runs out?

• Graham : I don't have the slightest idea of who I am. And I'm supposed to be able to explain to you? And why? You tell me why? Why do I have to explain myself to you?

• Graham : Have you ever been on television?

  Ann : Television? No, no. Why - why?

  Graham : I was just curious.

• Graham : One woman used up only 3 minutes, and another used three 2-hour tapes.

• Ann : You don't believe in therapy?

  Graham : No, I - I, you know, I - I believe in it for some people. I - I don't know, it was silly for me. I was confused going in. So, I just - I formed my own theory that - you should never take advice from someone that doesn't know you intimately.

  Ann : Oh, but, I'm - I know my therapist intimately.

  Graham : Oh, you've had sex with your therapist.

  Ann : No! No. No.

  Graham : Oh, I'm sorry. That's what I meant.

• Ann : Graham - that's an unusual name.

  Graham : Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is. My mother is a complete Anglophile, anything British makes her drool like a baby. So, she - you know, I mean she heard the name in a movie or something. She's a prisoner of public television now.

• Graham : What is the most - unusual location you've ever masturbated in?

  Girl on Tape : Well, um, one time I was flying from Los Angeles to, um, New York. And I was, you know, it was a really crowded flight and I was - I was sitting in the middle, you know, I didn't get a window, I didn't get an aisle. It was really funny and I was - I was just - I was bored. And my magazines were just boring and I think I had like a woman's magazine. There were - they touch on a lot of sexual issues and stuff like that. I was just thinking to myself, God, that's what I need. I need a little - something to take my mind off this trip. So, I was just, you know, just thinking away and then I just - I just did it on the plane. Just between these two people. I - nobody knew.

  Graham : How were you able to not betray what was going on, to the people around you?

  Girl on Tape : Well, you know, I have really strong muscles.

• Cynthia : Do you think I'm pretty.

  Graham : Yes.

  Cynthia : Prettier than Ann?

• Ann : So what do you have to do to get ready?

  Graham : Load a tape and turn on the camera.

  Ann : Do it.

• Ann : You just ask them questions?

  Graham : Yes.

  Ann : And they answer them?

  Graham : Yeah. Mostly. Sometimes they do things.

  Ann : To you?

  Graham : No. To - for the camera.

• Ann : What are these?

  Graham : Those are videotapes.

  Ann : I can see that. Of what?

  Graham : It's a - personal project I've been working on.

  Ann : What kind of personal project?

  Graham : What?

  Ann : What kind of personal project.

  Graham : A personal project like anyone else's personal project. Mine's just a little more personal, I guess.