- Marlboro: My old man told me, before he left this shitty world, never chase buses or women, you'll always be left behind.
- Marlboro: My old man told me, before he left this shitty world, the right woman can make ya, and the wrong woman can break ya.
- Marlboro: You know, that gun costs about two dollars every time you fire it. That's two bucks a bullet.
- Harley Davidson: Well how many'd I hit?
- Marlboro: You spent twelve dollars and didn't hit a goddamn thing. I nailed one and it cost about four and a quarter.
- Marlboro: My old man used to tell me before he left this shitty world, five rules of playing pool for cash. Lesson #1, always shoot with a cigarette in your mouth.
- Big Indian: Can't smoke with no fire, asshole.
- Marlboro: I quit!, Lesson #2, always know the table before you shoot.
- [Marlboro shoots the ball]
- Marlboro: Lesson #3, make sure you chalk that stick... REAL GOOD... before each shot!
- [Marlboro shoots the ball again]
- Marlboro: Lesson #4, never make a bet... if you can't pay the debt.
- [Marlboro puts his hat on the table and shoots the ball again]
- Marlboro: Lesson #5, if you lose, make sure you stand up straight and tall.
- [points to the ball]
- Marlboro: that corner... like a man
- Marlboro: School's out boys!
- Big Indian: You better get out of town, cowboy... before my cord snaps!
- Marlboro: I'm good to go, as soon as I have five big bills in my pocket... and your woman in my bed!
- Big Indian: Well I ain't got no $500 cowboy, and there's no way in hell you're bedding down my woman.
- Harley Davidson: We're gonna jump.
- Marlboro: Are you out of your fuckin' mind?
- Harley Davidson: C'mon, it's the only way.
- Marlboro: Uh-uh.
- Harley Davidson: You're gonna get shot up here.
- Marlboro: Well, you're gonna get squashed down there.
- Harley Davidson: I'd rather be squashed than shot.
- Marlboro: Not me.
- Harley Davidson: Fine, then.
- [punches Marlboro]
- Harley Davidson: I owe you that.
- [Jumps off building into pool below]
- Marlboro: I hate you for this... I fuckin' hate you for this.
- [Jumps]
- Marlboro: I HATE YOU HARLEY... Oh shit!
- Harley Davidson: Some rush, eh?
- Harley Davidson: I kicked his ass before.
- Marlboro: That was in 3rd grade, and Jack had a broken arm.
- Harley Davidson: Yeah, but I'm the one that broke it.
- Harley Davidson: [after wishing Marlboro "Happy Birthday"] How does it feel to be an old man?
- Marlboro: The older the bull, the stiffer the horn.
- Marlboro: You know, my old man told me before he left this shitty world that there would be blue-bellied chicken shit bastards like you out there!
- Harley Davidson: Are you and me friends?
- Marlboro: Sure, we're friends.
- Harley Davidson: Then how come, with all this shit that me and you have been through, I've asked you the same question a thousand times and you ain't never answered me?
- Marlboro: What question?
- Harley Davidson: What's with you and those fuckin' boots?
- Marlboro: My old man gave me these boots. First time I rode in a professional rodeo. It was the first and last thing he ever gave me.
- Harley Davidson: Marlboro, you could've told me that.
- Marlboro: I kinda figured it was between him and me.
- Guard: [Harley and Marlboro are robbing an armoured car] Who are you guys?
- Marlboro: Well, he's Harley Davidson, and I'm the Marlboro Man.
- Guard: You look like a bunch of two-bit hoods to me.
- Harley Davidson: [the car's trunk explodes] Now does that look like the work of two-bit hoods?
- Guard: Yeah. Pros would've used my keys.
- [Harley and Marlboro look at each other]
- Harley Davidson: Well, he likes to blow things up.
- Harley Davidson: You know, this really pisses me off. Your store has such nice clean filtered fresh air and it just takes a couple of scumbags to stink it up.
- Marlboro: [Walking along brightly lit Las Vegas strip] I hate this fucking town.
- Harley Davidson: Hey, man, you don't know anything about this city.
- Marlboro: I grew up here, you dumb bastard.
- Harley Davidson: I didn't know that.
- Marlboro: Yeah, well, what you don't know is a lot.
- Harley Davidson: You mean to tell me that real cowboys - I mean shit-kicking rodeo cowboys - come from Vegas?
- Marlboro: Some of the best. Perhaps even ONE of the best.
- Disc Jockey: There's a new drug out there called Crystal Dream. Now, what it is, you don't shoot it, you don't smoke it, you don't snort it. Apparently, you put it in your eyes, and it tells you lies.
- Virginia Slim: Robert, you've got to tell me where you are.
- Marlboro: Nope, can't do that. I've already dug enough graves, and none of them my own.
- Harley Davidson: Looks like you jumped on the wrong horse there cowboy! In case you didn't notice, you're the only cowboy in this place.
- Big Indian: He ain't a cowboy, he's more like a pretty boy.
- Harley Davidson: You know, if I had a nickel for every time some piece of shit pointed a gun at me I'd be a rich man.
- Suzie: [Harley has saved her mini-mart from being robbed] Hey mister... What's your name?
- Harley Davidson: Harley. Harley Davidson.
- [Harley shoots Marlboro in the arm trying to hit Alexander]
- Marlboro: [winces in pain] That hurt, Harley. That hurt bad.
- Alexander: Looks like your luck just ran out. Now, where is the money?
- Marlboro: [yelling to Harley] Shoot him, goddamnit!
- Alexander: Keep shooting. You'll make my job easier.
- Marlboro: [yelling to Harley] Shoot the bastard! Don't think, just shoot him! Shoot him!
- [Harley shoots Alexander dead]
- Marlboro: That one's for you. How'd it feel?
- Harley Davidson: Best twelve bucks I ever spent.
- Henchman: I find it hard to believe you greased those cue balls, but it's a good thing somebody did.
- Harley Davidson: Why's that?
- Henchman: They were pussies.
- [Chance looks at his office all bullet ridden after his henchman working for Harley & Marlboro shot out the window]
- Chance Wilder: What did you do? You pay him?
- Harley Davidson: No man, that was your money. You paid him. He did that for free.