Double, Double Toil and Trouble (1993 TV Movie)

Wayne Robson: Gravedigger

Photos 

Quotes 

• Kelly Farmer : [Gravedigger sees Norman the dog and screams]  He won't hurt you.

  Gravedigger : Who said that?

  Kelly Farmer : Me.

  Gravedigger : Oh.

  Lynn Farmer : Yeah, that's just Norman, he wouldn't hurt anybody.

  Gravedigger : But... you were over there!

  Kelly Farmer : No, that was me.

  Gravedigger : [Screams]  You're at two places at the same time!

  Lynn Farmer : We're twins, silly.

  Gravedigger : Oh... ohh... twins! Oh, twins!

  Kelly Farmer : Do you drink a lot of coffee?

  Lynn Farmer : You might want to switch to decaf.

• Mr. N : [Lynn makes a last stand towards Aunt Agatha]  Be careful, Lynn.

  Aunt Agatha : You're wearing my moonstone. Give it to me. I'll turn you into a snail.

  Lynn Farmer : Not! You can't hurt me as long as I'm wearing the moonstone

  Aunt Agatha : Sofia's been blabbing, has she? Look, dear, you and I don't have to be enemies huh? Do we?

  Lynn Farmer : No, we don't. If you let Kelly go, and Aunt Sofia...

  Aunt Agatha : Wait wait wait wait. I have a better idea. I know you're different from your sister. You're... You're special.

  Lynn Farmer : What do you mean?

  Aunt Agatha : Well, I mean you're tired of being a twin, aren't you?

  Lynn Farmer : Yeah. But...

  Aunt Agatha : Oh. I know what that's like, dear, having to share everything, or having people get you all mixed up together.

  Lynn Farmer : Well...

  Aunt Agatha : You and I could possess the moonstone together.

  Lynn Farmer : [Looks over to Kelly, who's currently being held by George]  But what about Kelly?

  Aunt Agatha : Oh, all she does is get in the way. We'll put her with Aunt Sofia on the other side of the mirror. And then you won't be a twin anymore, think of it! Ha ha ha!

  Lynn Farmer : [Thinks for 10 seconds]  No!

  Oscar : That's telling her!

  Gravedigger : Yeah!

  Aunt Agatha : I tried to be nice!

  Kelly Farmer : That'll be the day.

  Aunt Agatha : [to Kelly]  Quiet!

  [George covers Kelly's mouth with his hand] 

  Aunt Agatha : George, didn't I try to be nice?

  [George nods] 

  Aunt Agatha : But no more Mr. Nice Guy! I can't cast a spell on you. But your sister isn't wearing the moonstone.

  Lynn Farmer : Don't turn her into anything! Don't hurt her!

  Aunt Agatha : I'll offer you a straight exchange.

  [Kelly bites George's hand] 

  Aunt Agatha : If you give me the moonstone, I'll let both of you go.

  Kelly Farmer : [George struggles to keep Kelly quiet]  Don't do it, Lynn! She's a liar!

  Aunt Agatha : It's your choice, Lynn! George, bring Kelly closer so I can start saying a spell.

  Lynn Farmer : No! I'll do it. But you have to promise to let everyone go.

  Mr. N : Me too!

  Lynn Farmer : And turn Mr. N back into a person.

  Aunt Agatha : All right. I promise.

  Lynn Farmer : Cross your heart.

  Aunt Agatha : Cross my heart.

  Lynn Farmer : Hope to die.

  Aunt Agatha : Hope to die.

  Lynn Farmer : Stick a needle in your eye,

  [Shakes] 

  Lynn Farmer : Shake your bottom if you got 'em.

  Aunt Agatha : Stick a needle in your bottom... Oh, just hand it over!

  Lynn Farmer : First let Kelly go.

  Aunt Agatha : First hand it over.

  Lynn Farmer : You go first.

  Aunt Agatha : You go first.

  Lynn Farmer : You go first.

  Aunt Agatha : You go first. Oh, for goodness sake! Just put the moonstone down here on the floor! George, when the moonstone is on the floor, let that Kelly girl go. And then I'll turn back Mr. N and then we'll call it a night.

• Mr. N : What's shaking, man?

  Gravedigger : Ahh! Oh!

  [Falls backwards to garbage bags] 

  Lynn Farmer : [Goes to grab Gravedigger from escaping]  Oh, no you don't.

  [Pulls Gravedigger back to the Oscarmobile] 

  Mr. N : How do you do? Plato Naufzagger. Stay cool. I''m not really a bird. Nice place you've got here.

  Gravedigger : A talking crow?

• Lynn Farmer : [Lynn, Oscar, and Gravedigger try to enter Agatha's mansion]  I guess since she's my aunt, I should go first?

  Gravedigger : Yeah.

  Lynn Farmer : [Lynn walks to the door as Oscar and Gravedigger wait. She tries unsuccessfully to turn the knob]  It's locked.

  Oscar : Let's go around back.

  Gravedigger : Let's go bowling.

  [Oscar threatens Gravedigger] 

  Gravedigger : OK,OK.

  [They go around back] 

  Oscar : [Oscar tries to open the door]  It's locked. She may be mean, but she ain't stupid.

  Lynn Farmer : We can't give up.

  Oscar : I have an idea, come on.

  [They run far away from the mansion to get a better look] 

  Oscar : I think there's only one way to get in.

  Lynn Farmer : You mean that window up there that's open?

  Oscar : You got it!

  Gravedigger : Yeah, but how do we get up there?

  Oscar : To the Oscarmobile, quick!

  [Lynn and Oscar run while Gravedigger falls behind] 

• Oscar : [after getting turned into turtles]  After her, hurry!

  Gravedigger : Which way is South?

  Oscar : Where you going?

  Gravedigger : I want to go home.

• Aunt Agatha : [Gravedigger nervously awaits for his payment, Agatha pulls out a dollar bill]  Have you finished the task?

  [Gives him the dollar but still holds on] 

  Aunt Agatha : But not before telling those little twin girls something to which they shouldn't be privy?

  Gravedigger : I... I...

  Aunt Agatha : Don't try! Your days, pitiful and pathetic as they are, shall be numbered!

  [the Gravedigger runs away scared] 

  Aunt Agatha : If I ever see your stupid, shriveled face again, I'll use it as an oil rag!

  [Walks back inside] 

  Aunt Agatha : George, pour me a bath! Make it good and cold!

• Mr. N : [Oscar successfully gets on the roof]  Caw! Good flying!

  Oscar : [Looks down]  I'll unlock the side door!

  Gravedigger : Okay.

  [Lynn and Gravedigger run for the side door] 

• Gravedigger : Not in the dark. No, sir. Not on Halloween. No sir. Not so close to midnight!

  Lynn Farmer : But you have to take us there!

  Gravedigger : There's no telling what terrible things might happen if you try to break that spell. Oh no, I'm staying right here where it's nice and bright!

  [Folds his arms] 

  Lynn Farmer : Oscar,

  [Gets up off the table] 

  Lynn Farmer : Why don't you stay here for a minute?

  Oscar : I don't think you should go outside...

  [Lynn elbows Oscar] 

  Oscar : Ow. OK... good idea.

  [She walks out] 

  Oscar : [to Gravedigger]  Look, Mr. Gravedigger, you have to help us and fast. You told the girls the spell has to be broken by midnight.

  Gravedigger : Did I say that? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, you could do it anytime, anytime at all. I'd wait til next summer if I were you.

  [Lynn turns the lights off, causing Gravedigger to get scared] 

  Gravedigger : Ahh! This never happened before! I... I don't like the dark.

  Lynn Farmer : [Reappears]  Gee, the lights went out.

  Gravedigger : Yeah.

  Lynn Farmer : Well, I guess it's time to go and leave Mr. Gravedigger...

  [Pats him on the shoulder] 

  Lynn Farmer : all alone in the dark.

  Gravedigger : [Grabs Lynn]  Oh, no, no, no, no, don't go. Don't go, I don't like to be alone in the dark.

  [Lets go of her] 

  Lynn Farmer : If you like, we'll keep you company.

  Gravedigger : [Relieved]  Oh! Oh, thank you.

  Lynn Farmer : On the way to Aunt Agatha's.

  [Lynn and Oscar exit. With no other options, Gravedigger grabs his jacket and follows them] 

• Gravedigger : [on the way to Aunt Agatha's mansion]  This is it, this is the place! You can let me off right now.

  Mr. N : Sit down Jack, you're rocking the boat!

• Gravedigger : If you had my job, you'd be nervous too.

  Kelly Farmer : What's your job?

  Gravedigger : I'm a gravedigger. That's why I'm digging a grave.

  Lynn Farmer : For who?

  Gravedigger : Shh! Shh! I'm doing it for very little money. For... Her. It doesn't pay to cross her. Who or what she plans to bury here, I don't know. I don't want to know. Oh, I have to hurry. I'm going home as soon as I can, and I'm not leaving my house again until the day after Halloween!

  Lynn Farmer : How come?

  Gravedigger : Don't you know what happens on Halloween?

  Kelly Farmer : Yeah, you go trick-or-treating!

  [Gravedigger shakes his head] 

  Kelly Farmer : [to Lynn]  This guy needs to get out more.

  [Lynn nods in agreement]