Caroline in the City (1995–1999)

Lea Thompson: Caroline Duffy, Sleigh Bell

Photos 

99 more photos

Quotes 

• Richard : In the future, when you tell your brother off in the dead of winter and storm outside, you might want to bring a coat.

  Caroline : I'm fine.

  Richard : Oh, please. You don't have to be proud in front of me. I've seen you eat M&Ms off the floor.

• Richard : Excuse me. What do you people think I do on my birthday?

  Caroline : I don't know. I just assumed you curled up with a handful of dirt from your homeland and waited 'til dawn.

  Richard : Nope that's New Year's.

• Annie : Hey you didn't stay 'til the end of my New Year's Eve Party.

  Caroline : Sorry, I just couldn't make a three-day commitment.

• Caroline : He wants to get married.

  Richard : To you?

  Caroline : No, to you.

• Richard's machine : Hello?

  Caroline : Yeah, Richard, it's Caroline -

  Richard's machine : Actually it's a machine, but aren't we all?

  Caroline : So now you decide to develop a sense of humor?

• Maitre D : I put them at the VIP table.

  Caroline : The VIP table?

  Maitre D : Very Irritating Pains-in-the-Butt.

• Caroline : You know, you could try being nicer to him.

  Richard : Yeah, and I could watch Tori Spelling play Medea. But life is just too short.

• Caroline : Well, um, listen I'm really tired. And I have to get up early because I'm . . . going to bed early.

• Richard : So, no one liked my paintings in Rome, either. But it was just as well. After Julia left me, I couldn't paint anymore.

  Caroline : She broke your heart?

  Richard : No, she broke my paint brush! Of course she broke my heart. I mean I was in love with her, you know. Sincere amore. The kind of love you never have to question.

• Del : What do you mean? You're going to give up $200 just because you're a little embarrassed? I'd walk down the street naked for $200...

  Caroline : You'd do that for 15, we already determined that last Halloween.

• Richard : Oh, God, I hate Mondays.

  Caroline : It's Tuesday, Richard.

  Richard : I know, I'm still trying to get over yesterday.

• Caroline : [doorbell]  I'll get it.

  Richard : I'll get it.

  Caroline : No, I'll get it.

  Richard : I said I'll get it.

  Caroline : Fine, then you get it.

  Richard : You wanna get it so bad, then you get it.

• [Salty jumps into Richard's lap] 

  Richard : How anecdotal. Can you please just make it disappear?

  Caroline : I'm sorry. Are you allergic?

  Richard : No, I just don't like cats or dogs or anything that runs up to you and pees on your feet when you come home.

• Caroline : I'm not going to let them get away with this. I'm going to mock them in my comic strip.

  Richard : No, no, no. Caroline, please. Remember when you mocked the electric company? I'm not working by candlelight again.

• Caroline : Richard, I can't believe we brought a baby into this world.

  Richard : Well, Vicki did most of the work.

• Richard : Donna, I'm sorry were gonna have to call this off; my wife gets very jealous.

  Caroline : I can't believe you, bringing another one of your women up here. While I'm at home feeding little Richard. And on our anniversary. He's not even a painter, you know. He's a beast.

• Richard : Thanks.

  Caroline : You're welcome.

  Richard : Slap was a bit much.

  Caroline : That was for ignoring me in the restaurant.

• Richard : Mother, buy a gun, it will be faster.

  Caroline : But not nearly as much fun.

• Caroline : You're Richard's mother?

  Natalie Karinsky : Oh, did he tell you I was dead? Usually he tells everyone I'm dead.

  Annie : No. He said you lived in Utah.

  Natalie Karinsky : Utah? I'd rather be dead.

• Annie : Oh oh, there he is. Places.

  Caroline : Annie, maybe you shouldn't.

  Annie : Mrs. Karinsky, can we screw with your kid's head?

  Natalie Karinsky : That's usually a mother's job but what the hell. Go for it.

• Caroline : What's happening, Charlie?

  Charlie : Well I heard on the news that they found these crows in New Mexico that use tools. They're closing in on us, man. I don't even own tools.

• Richard : OK, OK, well you've all met Lady Bracknall. So let the games begin.

  Caroline : Well, she really didn't say much but your imaginary friend Adam, he spilled his guts.

  Annie : Yeah, Mr. Bedwetter.

  Richard : I can't believe she told you that.

  Annie : She didn't, gotcha. Five bucks.

• Caroline : I still have William Shatner's Christmas album if it'll put you in the mood.

  Richard : Yeah, to climb up a clock tower and thin out the neighborhood.

• Caroline : How are you getting on with your neighbors?

  Richard : Not as well as they're getting on with each other.

• Caroline : I've seen Annie naked.

  Richard : Who hasn't?

• Caroline : Don't judge me. You drink from the toilet bowl.

• Caroline : Is it true that one Christmas---

  Natalie Karinsky : Is he still bringing that up? We're JEWISH!!

• Caroline : Are you going to untie me?

  Richard : Not today.

• Caroline : Richard, you can't just pretend that nothing happened.

  Richard : That's the beauty of being repressed, I can.

• Advertising Lady : You want a puppet? Get her a puppet!

  Richard : She already has one. Me.

  Caroline : And if you're really good, maybe someday you'll turn into a real boy.

• Caroline : Maybe you've heard of her? Donna Spadaro? She had that big hit back in the eighties, "On Black Top Road".

  Richard : Oh, right, On Black Top Road. Yeah, of course I remember.

  Caroline : You do?

  Richard : No, but I was afraid you'd sing it to me.

• Caroline : Richard, I'm gonna call you in an hour and if you don't answer, I'm coming over.

  Richard : Caroline, you're a cartoonist. What are you gonna do? Draw the chalk outline around me?

  Detective : Sorry, she can't. It's a union job.

• Caroline : You know, life's a lot like a river: fast, furious, unpredictable. You just have to take it as it comes. Every now and then though, I wish I was one of those people who had a boat . . .

• Caroline : I just ate 24 of these cookies, but they're fat-free so it's okay.

• Caroline : Richard, why is all your furniture in the hall?

  Richard : We had to pee.

• Caroline : And for my next trick I'm going to make my boyfriend disappear. I say the magic words. Opera.

• Caroline : You weren't thinking right. All that blood was rushing from your head to other places.

• Caroline : Oh, that is so sweet!

  Del : Really? 'Cause when I was saying it, I was thinking, 'Boy, is this sounding stupid.'

• Caroline : Nobody ever says, 'Oh, you're going to Princeton and then to Harvard for a law degree, well, it's your life!'

• Caroline : It wasn't my one and only marriage proposal. In second grade, a guy proposed to me and besides the fact that he ate paste, he was quite a catch.

• Richard : I've never flown first class before.

  Caroline : The stewardesses have sex with you.

  Richard : Yeah, right.

  Del : Sometimes they really do.

• Del : It doesn't have to be the worst time in your life.

  Caroline : Isn't that the slogan for Euro-Disney?

• Caroline : What about him?

  Annie : Married.

  Caroline : No ring.

  Annie : He's buying over-the-calf socks.

  Caroline : So?

  Annie : Over-the-calf socks look better when you're dressed because there's no gap between trouser and sock when you cross your legs. Crew socks look better when you're undressed because you don't look like a dork. Obviously, this guy cares more about what he looks like dressed than undressed, ergo married.

• Police Officer : We're looking for a Mr. Richard Karinsky.

  Caroline : Why?

  Richard : Because my life is like a Kafka novel.

• Caroline : Thanks for answering my ad, Mr. Monroe.

  Monroe : It's just 'Monroe.' One word, like 'Picasso.' Or 'Cher.' Or 'Satan!'

• Caroline : Now, promise me you won't tell them.

  Annie : What kind of person do you think I am?

  Caroline : I repeat: promise me you won't tell them.

  [they enter] 

  Caroline : Hey, guys.

  Del : Hey, hey. What ya' been?

  Annie : Well, you guys won't believe this. Caroline and I were out at the ATM on Eighth St.

  Caroline : Okay, fine, let's just get it out in the open. I picked my nose and they got it on videotape. Give me your best shot. You may not get another opportunity like this. Caroline, you're so snotty. Caroline, don't be so picky.

  Del : Caroline, you picked your nose?

  Richard : Oh my God. And I use your pencils.

  Annie : Well, I was only going to say you lost your 200 bucks, but hey.

• Del : Of all the people for this to happen to. I mean, you won't even floss in front of me.

  Caroline : Hey, hey, hey. We all have our own little thing. Who locks the bathroom door even when he's all alone?

  Del : I'm working on that.

• Richard : Oh, please, why don't you just leave her alone. Look, Caroline has some standards, something you both have learned to live without.

  Caroline : Well, thank you, Richard.

  Richard : Of course, if you really had standards you wouldn't have done anything that disgusting in the first place. If you'll excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom.

• Caroline : You know, I'm gonna let that go. Because you're the birthday boy. Now. I couldn't decide whether to buy you something like a sweater, or get you a check.

  [picks up gift] 

  Caroline : But I decided checks are just so impersonal so happy birthday, Richard.

  [opens paper] 

  Richard : Great, just what I needed. Every year, another

  [pulls out check] 

  Richard : A check?

  Caroline : I decided impersonal was more you.

• Caroline : Does the hospital know you're gone, Richard? Because you are, you know.

• Caroline : You know, Aunt Mary, since the railroads, we can get foodstuffs in New York.

  Aunt Mary : Don't sass your Auntie. Oh, Richard, thank you so much.

  [hands him a coin] 

  Aunt Mary : This is for you.

  Caroline : You know, you don't have to tip Richard.

  Richard : Don't sass your Auntie.

• Richard : How could anyone not like the opera. Opera is transcendent. It is the most intense musical experience a person can have.

  Caroline : Plus you get to wear those neat, long gloves!

  Richard : You know, I'm certain that's what Mozart had in mind when he wrote The Marriage of Figaro. 'Oh, goodie, now women can accessorize!'

• Richard : She just stopped by to remind me that my life is an endless purgatory, interrupted by profound moments of misery.

  Caroline : It's been a while since I've heard the phrase 'unending purgatory.' Welcome back.

• Caroline : Alone in the moonlight, walking hand-in-hand with a monkey. Kinda reminds me of my first date with Del!

• Caroline : Richard, why are you so nervous? Donna's gone.

  Richard : Caroline, I spent the afternoon with a mobster's girlfriend and she was naked. They cut off your tongue if you squeal. God only knows what they cut off for this.

• Caroline : Wait, wait, wait, wait. Can you explain this to me? I left my Secret Italian Decoder Ring in my other purse.

• Annie : Oh oh, and I met a guy. Rob Rothman.

  Caroline : Wow. What's he like?

  Annie : I have no idea. I was hoping you would remember him.

  Caroline : Wait, you know his name but you don't remember what he looks like?

  Richard : Oh, interesting variation. Usually she remembers what they look like and can't remember their names.

  Annie : Well, I guess I had a tad too much punch.

• Annie : All right you buy something for Del that cost the same. You keep the bracelet for yourself. Then nobody is selfish, everybody is generous and you've got 25 new best friends.

  Caroline : Annie, that's a total rationalization.

  Annie : Thank you.

  Caroline : No, thank you.

• Caroline : There's the dirtbag now.

  Annie : Since when does he knock?

  Caroline : Since he walked in on Del doing pushups in the nude.

• Richard : Is she gone yet?

  Caroline : Yeah, Richard, she left.

  Annie : Give your mommy a kiss . . . it hurts to talk like that.

• Caroline : For Christmas my mom makes gingerbread men with little raisin nipples.

• Caroline : You know if this whole thing with Richard doesn't turn out, you wanna be my mom?

• Del : Here, Richard, have a mug.

  Caroline : Don't drink out of it though.

  Richard : That's the story of my life.

• Annie : He says 'I love you', and you say 'thanks'?!

  Caroline : He's been saying I love you all day, and I already used 'Yep', 'I know', and "Uh, hey, what's that over there!"

• Caroline : Hey, Richard, how was your New Year's Eve?

  Richard : Oh, sublime. Scott and Zelda and I shared a cab over to the Stork Club where we drank pink champagne out of Zelda's slipper.

  Caroline : You know, a simple "I stayed in" would have sufficed.

• Caroline : I'm not a crier!

  Richard : Spend a year on this side of the desk.

• Caroline : Brace yourself, I'm going to hug you.

• Annie : My mother is driving me crazy!

  Caroline : That reminds me. I need to get a new phone.

• Richard : You could just say Russian names until my ears bleed.

  Caroline : Then what would we do for New Year's?

• Joe : We always stay at your place.

  Caroline : Yeah, well, I clean.

• Richard : There's a form in this marble that I'm trying to liberate and I'm just waiting for it to speak to me.

  Caroline : Maybe you should buy it dinner.

• Caroline : You took a leap.

  Richard : If you tell me to turn my frown upside down, I swear I'm gonna vomit.

• Joe : He just peed on my fruton!

  Caroline : You said you weren't bringing your fruton!

  Joe : I'm not now!

• Caroline : What's wrong with me?

  Richard : Other than the fact that you qualify as an open container?

• Richard : You want some coffee? What am I talking about, I don't have any coffee. How about some brown water?

  Caroline : I love brown water.

• Caroline : I remember the last time I wore those pumps, I was at Joe's, and we were playing twister, and I was on top . . .

  Richard : Please don't finish that sentence.

• Richard : Because then he'll want to get back together but I'll have to tell him we're not getting back together but I can't do that over the phone so I'll have to go over there and then we will get back together because I'm spineless and completely co-dependent!

  [Caroline gives him a strange look] 

  Richard : I'm sorry, I just made that last part up.

  Caroline : No, it's good, keep it.

• Cop : Get married, move to Long Island, have a couple of kids. You'll be safe.

  Caroline : Did my mother send you?

  Cop : Do it now while you're pretty, 'cause in 10 years you're just gonna have to get a gun.

• Caroline : Del, that's "Fried Green Tomatoes".

  Del : Oh yeah, I love this movie. That Mary Stuart Jessica Louise Parker really cracks me up.

• Caroline : Richard, what could you possibly have against cereal? Don't you watch the commercials? It's part of a complete breakfast.

  Richard : So is sand, as long as the other part is actual food.

• Caroline : You see, Del, you're a turtleneck kind of guy, while the Jewish man is . . . a crew neck kind of guy.