I Love You, I Love You Not (1996) User Reviews

Messages and mega-stars!

[Xapora · 6/10 · 14 May 2005]

Sad, strange little movie stars Claire Danes as Daisy; a shy, bookish girl attending an elite private school in New York. When she's not gushing over the delectable Ethan (Jude Law), she's spending time with her Nana in the countryside reading books and listening to Nana's tales of her survival of the holocaust.

The movie tries to intertwine the themes of post and modern day anti-semitism via Nana's stories and flashback sequences with Daisy's trials and tribulations at school when knowledge of her Jewish heritage is made public.

Unfortunately, as hard as this movie tries, it never quite hits the mark. The performances from Danes and Moreau though are heartfelt, and the message is there for those who want to see it. This movie means well and attempts to educate us on one of the all time greatest blights on mankind - prejudice.

Worth a look for early performances from Jude Law, James Van Der Beek and Julia Stiles before they hit the big time.

Slow, delivers the message suddenly

[adorable-3 · 6/10 · 23 August 1999]

Well, this is certainly a fast forward movie to be rented, with many parts that could be zapped past.

It does explore how one grows up and deals with the pains of youth, and surprisingly, it does end with a splash that isn't expected, yet makes sense in review the movie.

It's certainly worth seeing along with a field trip to the Simon Wiesenthal Center in Southern California to understand the background of the story and to get a better grasp of the complexities of emotions that many have to deal with even today.

But it isn't a movie that is very deep nor giving. The viewer is left sitting there with the ending, and yet wondering why bother as the movie does deliver fully in engrossing the viewer and placing them into another world. It is a third person movie and you are that 3rd person -- a casual observer never to really enter.

A first draft, by a child, compared to Schindler's List.

Mixed themes yield a disappointment

[Rod-54 · 5/10 · 5 December 2000]

For me this film is unsuccessful in intermingling the issue of antisemitism with the coming of age of a relatively studious young woman. On one level the Jude Law character might be only marginally deeper than his disgustingly callow friends. He is attracted by the young woman's seriousness and relatively shy affection for him but this attraction is offset by her social conservatism. The depth of any antisemitism in him or amongst his silly friends is never explored. In the end the motivation of his character, and the point of the film, elude me. An interpretation that springs to mind is that gentiles do not feel the significance of the holocaust, that they trivialise it. Part of coming of age for jewish girls is therefore that they should (or simply do) experience failed love affairs with gentiles. The fact that these affairs fail for these reasons is somehow constructively educational for the girls. I truly hope this is not intended to be the message.

My So-Called Holocaust Life

[film-critic · 1/10 · 11 February 2006]

I am so angry at this film that it will be very difficult for me to contain the harsh words that are ready to spew from my mouth. This will not be a review for young readers. I Love You, I Love You Not was an atrocity from beginning to end. From both the disgustingly poor editing, to the sloppy acting, all the way to the horrendous themes that seemed to plot two random events together this film screamed "After School Special". In fact, now that I think about it, "After School Special" would be too delicate of a summary, it instead felt like a eager undergraduate film student attempting to be smart by attempting to poorly summarize the Holocaust with the turmoil of being a high school student. Hopefully the professor of this assignment saw the project and properly gave it the "F" it deserved. Hollywood completely outdid itself on this doozy of a film. I am surprised that the Jewish community didn't find this film offensive in the way that it trivialized the events of the Holocaust and compared them to the social troubles of a High School girl. I was upset by this occurrence, and I am not even Jewish. After this short film viewing, I felt dirty, upset by the Hollywood community, and ready to shout obscenities at everyone involved with this project. I Love You, I Love You Not was just another Hollywood attempt to monopolize on Claire Danes' My So-Called Life popularity while trying to be overly symbolic by involving the Holocaust.

Is anyone else as sick as I am about this disgraceful marriage? I do not understand at all what director Billy Hopkins was attempting to convey with this film. The themes were muddled in a slew of choppy editing and horrid flashbacks that left my mind in a confused knot. In one instance we had Danes unwilling to spend time with her grandmother, while in the next instance she was opening up everything in her life to her, while in the next she was making out with the mirror, and suddenly in the next she was asking Moreau to tell her a nightmarish bedtime story involving Robert Sean Leonard. Wouldn't that give anyone nightmares? It did give everyone nightmares and preempts our next step into the randomly anti-Semitic High School in which Danes attends. Unlike other films that use the Holocaust to show the injustices of the world, like in School Ties, this film randomly interjects the anti-Semitic moments near the end as if only to help strengthen already dead climax. Like nearly every scene in this film, the supposed "high-points" come and go nearly as quickly as modern fashion, leaving the viewer with nothing at all. I walked away of this film with an embarrassed look. While there may have been some attempt at meaning behind Billy Hopkins' camera, what eventually was released was a childish attempt to combine the trivial life of a High School girl to that of the monumental disaster known as the Holocaust. Could you put these two together? A great director probably could, but Hopkins' could not. All that it seems that he wants to create are meaningless dramatic plot-holes coupled with beautiful people.

Which, ultimately, leads me to the acting. While "abhorrent" would be a light word summarizing the purely absent acting of Danes, Law, and Van Der Beek, it is the only one that I could think of. Danes, using the same character structure from My So-Called Life in this film, could not find her way out of a paper bag if she tried. I could hear Hopkins in the background saying, "Give me more Angela Chase, I hired you for Angela, I WANT ANGELA". Her character is all over the place, manic depressive in one moment, happy the next, chaotic throughout, pitiful entirely. I loved the fact that she was a "reader", but one of the most ignorant characters created. You would think that with all the books she would have learned from them, sputtering quotes throughout the film, but alas, that never happened. Again, we were left with only Angela Chase. Award winning Jeanne Moreau bounces of the non-existent acting of Danes by providing her own character which does not fit into this film. Obviously disturbed by her time in Auschwitz, Moreau never develops this. She allows Danes to walk all over her, creating a weak grandmother and a needy, spoiled granddaughter. Throw in "boy-toy" Jude Law only for looks (because his character was as transparent as Saran wrap) and you have the worst cast in cinema. Nobody did any work with their characters, but instead walked around the set happy to be earning some, if any, money for their roles. I am surprised that both Danes and Law were able to pull themselves out of the I Love You, I Love You Not rut.

Overall, this was a confusing film that was only proved worse by torrential acting, very ill cinematography, a hasty Hollywood story (very obviously created by the infamous recycle machine), and by combining a trivial moment in a teenager's life with the historical hardships of the Holocaust. That would be similar to me trivializing the horrible deaths on the beaches of Omaha with me not getting a date for my Senior Prom. That just is painful to hear and visually see. The acting was non-existent, but obvious ploys to get a younger audience to attempt to connect with the story. The direction was nauseating. The constant flicking between present day and past stories kept me dizzied for days afterwards. Then, there was the uproarious casting of Robert Sean Leonard, I couldn't help but laugh when I continually saw him on screen. The only actor worth mentioning in this film was Julia Stiles, but that was because she kept her mouth shut. This was a disaster from the beginning and should be forgotten by all!

Grade: * out of *****

Heartfelt..but dissapointing

[kathleen-9 · 21 March 2000]

Essentially, this movie has all the makings for..well, a better one. Claire Danes plays a quiet girl with sad eyes, and unloving parents who spends most of her time with her Grandmother. One day in english class, she reads aloud a poem written about Jude Law's character, "Ethan", who is the stereotypical jock/playboy on campus. The two get together...blah blah blah..

I won't tell you anymore except the the ending is VERY dissapointing. It's as though the movie just, ends. You don't see it coming, you feel like it should be starting to get good, and the plot holes filled up..well, they aren't, and it does. It's really quite aggrivating. Jude Law and Claire Danes performances are great, but not quite enough to push this movie onto my favourite list. But, don't let me discourage you, it's worth the rent.

Good. Good. Bad. Bad.

[arcan27 · 7/10 · 22 March 2001]

I had to watch this movies twice. The first viewing left me a bit off kilter, a bit confused - as to how I felt about the film (the performances etc..) and the story. What I have decided after watching it over: This story is unique, nice. I felt the 3 main roles where well given. Claire Danes is the classic thoughtful and misunderstood child [My so called Life leading the way for teenage 'angst' series; Juliet - in Romeo and Juliet]. She pulls off the dreamy look. Jude Law, a fitting choice for Daisy's shy affections as her 'perfect' guy. The rest of the cast? Gone. Scratch all of them. I felt James Van Der Beek was totally unconvincing as a taunter/verbal bully (?). There were definitely angles in the film that needed work - particularly Ethan's character, and his interaction with his friends. If you try and come to some conclusion about them - you draw a blank. An intended one? I don't know. As well as Daisy's home life needed work. I can't decide whether it is left out on purpose or not.

The directing, for me, was what ultimately let the story down rather than enhancing it. No lingering shots, no closeups where there should have been, particularly during Ethan and Daisy's interaction. It's hard to explain, but the shot's didn't work. Didn't create the feeling the movie needed to work.

And this is a story that deserves to work.

Dreadful experience

[zwingli98 · 1/10 · 22 February 2008]

This film sucks.

Jude Law and Clare Danes are fine actors but please watch them in something else. Indeed, if you can't find something else to watch them in then just close your eyes and imagine. Anything has to be fundamentally better than subjecting yourself to this subhuman bit of schmaltz.

Comments about the cinematography or soundtrack are irrelevant - all is drowned out by the dull buzzing this so called motion picture invokes. It's driven me nearer divorce than anything else on the planet.

Personally I'd rather have dug an eyeball out with a spoon than sit through this abject guff.

A sweet story that could be us on it

[daumas · 6/10 · 9 August 1999]

A girl who loves to stay with her grandmother who was a jew survivor from the "camps" of Hitler, but hides her story, falls in love with an athlete guy in a high-school where the teens have prejudice against her and her way of life. Sweet, but slow movie, although Danes and Moreau are superb.

But what I really want to do is direct...

[wchelsea25 · 1/10 · 17 October 2014]

Eighteen years later and it's still being shown? What an embarrassment for all. Did anyone read the script before agreeing to do this?

This movie is jaw-droppingly bad and cringe-inducing. The story is insipid and that's being generous. The terrors of the Holocaust in this film could have been substituted for a disappointing shopping trip to Barney's. The characters are all extremely attractive but shallow and undeveloped, the settings and art direction are as beautiful and unrealistic as a Ralph Lauren magazine spread. That's the problem with the entire movie--everything is pretty, clean and sterile. The acting is direction-less, a waste of a fine cast.

The only reason I could think of why this 90 minutes of wasted time came to light is the back story of a casting director calling in favors from agents and the studio because what he really wanted to do was direct.

Her so called life

[pigletgirlkp · 6/10 · 26 July 2005]

Daisy (Claire Danes) is a young Jewish girl in a private school in New York City. An only child with a strained relationship with her parents she begins a relationship with Ethan (Jude Law) Mr. Perfect jock and scholar. After experiencing Anti-Semitism she finds comfort in her Nana (Jeanne Moreau.) A concentration camp survivor she helps Daisy accept who she is by telling her stories and playing mediator between Daisy and her parents. With a look into Jewish life both during and after the Holocaust, this movie is moving. With young actors like Jude Law, Claire Danes and James Van Der Beek you can't not like this movie. A well written story and good acting makes up for the lack luster ending.

Claire Danes at her worst.

[acidstar · 1/10 · 25 October 1999]

The movie looked hopeful. It turned out to be one of the worst movies I have ever seen. It could not decide if it wanted to be about WWII or about Daisy's life in New York. And the story between her and the boy of her dreams is completely unrealistic. He suddenly falls for her just because she wrote a poem about him. Basically I hated this movie and was tempted many times to turn it off. I rented it from the library and paid 50 cents, let me just say it is not even worth that!

Tour-de-force

[ivrydov · 10/10 · 10 June 2008]

At this date so far from the event, if some young person asked me what movie they could watch which would give them the essence of the Holocaust, this is the movie I would recommend.

I watched it because Jeanne Moreau was listed in the credits and she is worth the price of admission on any movie. She didn't disappoint.

The Holocaust theme was played perfectly. It starts off with the lecturer sketching out the event for those never exposed to it, having her field a mix of serious and stupid questions, and introducing the sole Jewish girl in the class, Daisy, obviously assimilated.

Her emotional attachment is with her grandmother, a Holocaust survivor Nana, played by Moreau, and the parents are never introduced; they would have just been clutter. Nana told her stories which conveyed the feeling of one having lived through the Holocaust and they affected Daisy psychologically to the point where she had nightmares. Why would she tell the girl such stories? Don't look for a rational explanation. She is a Holocaust survivor. If you think Nana should have had better sense relate this to The Pawnbroker starring Rod Steiger.

Perhaps 50 per cent of Jews in the fourth and fifth generations in America, certainly of the upper classes, have no feeling of being different from anyone else, which is a healthy and normal state of affairs, but anti-Semitism is still out there, and Daisy was touched by it in the locker scene. This was the result of these students having had the Holocaust shoved down their throat by that lecture and that's what some got out of it.

Her boyfriend Ethan did not dump her because she was Jewish, that is never stated explicitly, but she was too strange for him. It looked like this would be a case of opposites attract, but he was too shallow for her, and too immature. She was a prolific reader, an introvert, and possessed of a developing Jewish consciousness, which she got not from her parents, but it sprung on her from the relationship with her grandmother and the grandmother's tragic life. Daisy knew this influence had something to do with her losing Ethan and that's why she blurted out that she hated her grandmother at one point.

The utter evil of the Holocaust is conveyed in the scene where the Nazi takes the two little girls. For what purpose, we need not even guess. Two among 1,500,000 million children who met horrible endings.

Cinema has never really solved the problem of how to show life in the camps. The people were much too thin and too sick with a multitude of ailments and injuries, walking corpses, the milieu a babel of languages, and none of this can be portrayed by mere actors and actresses. We are left with the written word if you are looking for realism. Given the extreme restrictions anyone attempting a Holocaust theme faces who wishes to tell this story in a movie, this was a tour-de-force.

Another great performance from Claire

[tasmin · 7/10 · 13 August 1999]

I have loved everything Claire has done and this just adds to her great ability to carry out a story......this is a very good movie if you want to see the Holocaust from a survivors point of view.......at first it can be a little confusing with the flashbacks but if you pay attention you will understand it.....If you have any interest in the Holocaust this is a good movie to see....the only thing that bothers me is how the boy she is in love with acts.......the typical yeah I like you but I can't be seen with you attitude.....I know this is something that is very strong in society but it doesn't make it right and I hope young girls can see past that stupidity and not let themselves get caught up in it......and people wonder why girls have such low self esteem.

Confusing and Badly Executed

[iron_jawed_angel91 · 4/10 · 27 June 2005]

The acting was atrocious, although with Claire Danes, I have yet to see a movie I liked. Jude Law made an interesting debut, but I didn't quite understand what he was supposed to be. Danes' character was just strange, I couldn't understand the collapse in the lecture. How many times can we beat the Jews or any other race for that matter? The move mad the mistake of making the general population seem very prejudiced. I found this movie unrealistic and boring. Too many of these "discover you're heritage" movies are coming out. At least mine, "Angela's Ashes" was decent, but if you've seen them once, you've seen them all. For those of you looking to reconnect with your past, might I suggest "The Pianist"? This movie is horrible, don't waste your time.

Not horrible but not really good either

[Monika-5 · 3 March 2000]

This movie was 80 minutes long??? It seemed twice that! I Love You, I Love You Not is certainly not horrible, but it's not a movie I'd really care to watch again.

I was strolling through Blockbuster searching for a film to watch over the weekend when this particular one caught my eye. Even though I'm not a Claire Danes fan (though she did a fine job in Little Women), I saw Jude Law's name and knew I had to rent it. I was disappointed. This film is contrived, cliched, and doesn't know whether to be totally serious or humorous. It fails on all counts (especially the hokey scene at the school assembly)!

The narrative of this movie is totally choppy, and the Holocaust scenes and the school scenes don't seem to blend in well together. If they'd focused solely on the romance of Jewish Daisy and Gentile Ethan the film might have really gone somewhere. This is not to say that Jeanne Moreau doesn't shine as Nana, she absolutely radiates.

Claire Danes gives an OK performance, and had the role and the story in general been better, she could've done a terrific job as Daisy. And what about Daisy's parents? They are almost never mentioned. What exactly is her relationship with them?

The true saving grace is Jude Law as Ethan. We can see why he is entranced by Daisy, as she is not the "typical" cheerleader giggly type who hangs all over him. We understand how he gives in to the prejudice around him when it comes to Daisy and his friends. I believe, especially after Mr. Law's success in The Talented Mr. Ripley, he is going to take Hollywood by storm and make all sorts of great movies.

Let's just hope they're all better than this one!

Just plain bad

[Salbjorg · 1/10 · 26 May 2002]

First of all I have to say: This is the worst film that I have ever seen, and I have seen many. Besides that, it´s just plain bad. The relationship between Nana and Daisy was so "touchy" and pathetic that I wanted to scream. Daisy is always crying in the film and it gets really annoying . I would not rent it if I were you

Wondering what to think...

[nicolola · 6/10 · 9 January 2000]

When I watched "I Love You, I Love You Not," I was left with the feeling that it was a very emotional movie. Unfortunately, I wasn't exactly sure why. There are sections which certainly tug at your emotions, but they're very fragmented and confusing. There were some parts that I had no clue what was going on or why it was going on, and the end left me with more questions than answers. (Sometimes this can be a good thing, but in this particular case, I'd say it's not.) On the positive side of things, all the acting was terrific. Handsome Jude Law is of course a plus, as well the talented Claire Danes. It's just a shame that the movie couldn't have made better use of such talent.

Didn't expect a lot; still disappointed.

[claytonchurch1 · 2/10 · 17 July 2013]

I didn't expect a lot from this film, but I thought it would be worth a try. There were about two points during the first 35 minutes in which I was going to turn it off. It wasn't that interesting, and it was slow-moving. But, I have liked some things Clare Danes has been in, especially Temple Grandin, so I stuck with it. About the time that Daisy starts to see some fruit in her teenage crush, it really picked up and I was glad I had kept watching. Soon after that, though, it continued to be disappointing. Jude Law's character is not consistent; sometimes he's nice, and sometimes his character is just dull. I don't think that was really in the acting of Jude, but more in the writing. This was the absolute worst acting I've ever seen Claire Danes. I bet she's embarrassed about this film now. She went from being, at times, a mature young lady to other times seeming like a nine-year-old, emotionally. Her acting reminded me of an 11-year-old in a school play thinking that she was acting, so she had to be dramatic. Claire has wild swings of being skittishly excited and kind of queer (in the "immature" sense of that term). Her voice fluctuations were hard to take. Oh, and then there's the plot. Lots of dream sequences that don't really fully connect and an attempt in the writing to connect two separate themes and three separate locations that just came off disjointed. There were scenes that just seemed to be bad editing, that didn't follow. Don't waste your time; see another Claire Danes film.

Instructional movie for parents of vapid young women

[efarrell1 · 3/10 · 19 February 2008]

I saw useful comparisons between Daisy and my acquaintances's daughter at a time when her mother was baffled by her daughter's behavior. Sent a copy to my friend, but she didn't see any connections. Oh well, I received insight into the daughter in question. I had been mystified before I saw the movie.

Such a TREAT to Jeanne Moreau: so stalwart!! What seemed to non-equities in the Nana's portrayal, actually turned out to be an adaptation to a healthier outlook. I was most taken, when Nana says in reply to Daisy's question, "What is going to happen to me?", "Everything!!" I was able to take this movie line and get comfort from it.

The settings for the film were beautiful, charming, idyllic, old-fashioned, and European. (I think Sweden, Finland, Switzerland?? Just guessing.)

I found this film to be a treat for the eyes.

confused???

[Mariposa0514 · 2/10 · 25 March 2001]

I don't know about anyone else, but my friend and I watched this together and neither one of us understood it. I may watch it again sometime to try again but...It seemed like it was jumping in between times and you couldn't really tell what was happening when!

A beautiful and Sad Story about Finding Yourself

[Darkest_Rose · 8/10 · 12 December 2002]

I love you, I love you not is a beautiful and sad story about finding yourself in those difficult teenage years. Daisy(Claire Danes), plays a insecure,intense and shy teenage girl. She spends most of her time reading and spending time with the person she loves the most, her nana. Many people did not understand the concept of this movie and the relationship between daisy and her nana. Daisy is often bullied and school and misunderstood because she is jewish, just like her nana. Her nana was at a concentration camp when she was little and lost all of her family. This movie shows two storys, one with daisy and her nana, one with daisy at school and her friends but mostly the guy she has a crush on played my jude law, who I may say is very handsome. Daisy and her nana were kinda like one person, even the title of this movie explains a lot "i love you, I love you not" It has two sides to it, just like the movie. I think the "I love you" part is when daisy is with her nana, and the "I love you not" part is when daisy is outside of home, dreaming about her crush. This is a very beautiful compelling story, if people would only give it a chance, they would understand it. I would give I love you, I love you not 10/10

This movie shows why your grandparents shouldn't be your best friends

[catarina-campos · 1/10 · 2 November 2007]

Seriously, after I watched it, and all I could think of was how hurtful to Daisy it was having such a grandmother, who constantly absorbs her life and makes her unwilling to connect to anyone else, and creating such snowball effect. "Weirdness" aside it's not normal anyone would pick a park, with your acknowledged beau nearby, to just ignore him and read alone. Why go there at all? She seemed more anti-social than shy. You'd also think that someone who read so much would be more tolerant to the fact that others may not enjoy books, and be more eloquent.

Also the holocaust themes were badly tied into the movie, more like "hammered in", and some things don't even make any sense, like how that piece of paper got glued in her locked locker. Who would want to keep their stuff in those if they are that easy to open? the logical way would have been to toss the paper inside through the locker openings. But somehow they managed to find the time to leave class, bust open the locker during Daisy's gym class, glue it in, close it and....return to classes without their teachers noticing their absence? Even if we assume that they did get busted and lied about their whereabouts, it still doesn't make any sense they'd risk it like that.

I still don't get what was the point of the movie, all I know is that I had a lot more sympathy for the holocaust survivor speaker, who only appeared a few minutes, than Daisy.

I can't believe I watched this movie

[mark-coffey · 17 September 2001]

I was subjected to this movie a couple of nights ago and I have to say - it is the worst film I've seen in a long time. The whole story is sickly sweet. Clare Danes looks (and acts) like she is about 12. The writing is terrible - it has some of the cheesiest lines ever. It is worth watching for the tacky zoom shot in the very last scene. Don't waste your time.

I readily concur with "Acidstar"'s comments...

[Smidlap · 2/10 · 29 November 1999]

and found them right on the mark. Miramax can do a very deceptive job in their teasers, and they snookered me on this one. What I found really bizarre was the girl's relationship with her Grandmother. After a time I found all their kissing and smooching more than a bit too much.

If you want a sleeper of a "growing up" film that also has reference to the Jewish experience during WWII, check out the 1992 film "Alan and Naomi" with Lukas Haas. I found it unpretentious, sweet, and, at times, very funny.

A confused mess of a movie.

[=G= · 5/10 · 10 March 2002]

"I Love You, I Love You Not" is an ambiguous and confused movie about a Jewish prep school girl in NYC (Danes) who spends a lot of time hanging out and acting oh so very "girl" with her "nana" (Moreau) and falls for a too charming and over-acting Jude Law. A mess of a movie which spins nonsense around solid performances by Danes and Moreau, this flick has little to offer. Hey, if my grandma told me scary bedtime stories about the Angel of Death and the horrors of the holocaust at that tender age, I'd have issues too. Pass on this bit of fluff.