Batman & Robin (1997)

Uma Thurman: Poison Ivy, Dr. Pamela Isley

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Quotes 

• Mr. Freeze : I will blanket the city in endless winter. First Gotham, and then the world.

  Poison Ivy : Just what I had in mind. Everything dead on earth, except us. A chance for Mother Nature to start again. Behold, the dawn of a new age. My mutant plants have the strength of the deadliest animals. Once you have frozen mankind, these babies will overrun the globe, and we shall rule them, for we will be the only two people left in the world.

  Mr. Freeze : Adam and Evil!

• Poison Ivy : He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me...

  Mr. Freeze : NOT! Surprise, I am your new cell mate. And I'm here to make your life a living hell. Prepare for a bitter harvest. Winter has come at last.

• Poison Ivy : As I told Lady Freeze when I pulled her plug, this is a one woman show.

• Poison Ivy : So many people to kill... so little time.

• Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : I am Nature's arm. Her spirit. Her will. Hell, I am Mother Nature, and the time has come for plants to take back the world so rightfully ours! 'cause it's not nice to fool with Mother Nature.

• Poison Ivy : Kill them, of course. But why stop there? Why should only Batman and Robin die while the society that created them goes unpunished?

  Mr. Freeze : Yes! If I must suffer... Humanity will suffer with me! I shall repay them for sentencing me to a life without human comfort. I will blanket the city in endless winter! First... Gotham. And then... The world!

• Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : Curses!

• Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : Hello, Jason. I think I've had a change of heart. Quite literally. The animal-plant toxins had a rather unique effect on me. They replaced my blood with aloe, my skin with chlorophyll, and filled my lips...

  [She passionately kisses him on the lips] 

  Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : ... with venom. Oh and Jason, one other thing. I probably should've mentioned this earlier. I'm poison.

• [Batman has taken beating from Bane and lies stunned on the ground. Ivy moves over to him] 

  Poison Ivy : [standing over Batman]  There's something about an anatomically correct...

  Poison Ivy : [she lies down next to him]  ... rubber suit that puts fire in a girl's lips.

  [Poison Ivy blows a cloud of lovedust in Batman's face] 

  Batman : [resisting]  Why are all the gorgeous ones homicidal maniacs? Is it me?

  Poison Ivy : [smiling seductively]  Enough. Sweet talk...

  [tries to kiss Batman] 

  Batman : [pulls away from Poison Ivy]  OH no! First you're going to tell me where Freeze is, and then you're going to jail.

• Batman : [Batman bids for Poison Ivy]  One million dollars!

  Robin : [as does Robin]  Two million!

  Batman : You don't have it. Three million!

  Robin : I'll borrow it from you! Four million!

  Batman : Five million!

  Robin : That's a utility belt not a money belt. Six million.

  [Batman looks at Robin and then produces something from said-belt] 

  Batman : [firmly]  Seven million.

  [it's a credit card blazed with the Bat symbol. Expiration date: FOREVER] 

  Batman : Never leave the cave without it!

  Poison Ivy : [amused by the squabble she's caused]  You two boys aren't going to start fighting over little old me, now are you?

• Robin : I need a sign that you've turned over a new leaf.

  Ivy : How about "slippery when wet?"

• Poison Ivy : [Poison Ivy sneaks up on Robin]  Hey there, pretty birdie!

  Robin : Give yourself up! If you surrender...

  Poison Ivy : -to you?

  [She blows lovedust in Robin's face] 

  Poison Ivy : [Offering her hand]  Polly wanna kiss?

• Poison Ivy : Men, the most absurd of God's creatures. We give you life... and we can take it away just as easily.

• Poison Ivy : [to Nora Freeze]  I've never been good with competition. Who needs a frigid wife anyway?

• Poison Ivy : Kiss me and I'll tell you.

  Robin : Tell me and I'll kiss you.

• Poison Ivy : [at Arkham Asylum]  Let's cool it for now. There's someone I'd like you to meet.

  [Bane arrives, carrying Freeze's cryo-suit] 

  Poison Ivy : His name is Bane.

  Mr. Freeze : A laundry service that delivers. Wow!

  Poison Ivy : [watching Freeze suit up]  What are you, a fifty big and tall?

  Mr. Freeze : No. I always go a size smaller. Makes me look slimmer.

• [Poison Ivy auctions herself to the Ball-goers via a microphone] 

  Poison Ivy : Some lucky boy's about hit the honey pot...

  Poison Ivy : [moving over to Batman and Robin]  I'll include an evening of my company for the winner.

  Poison Ivy : [stopping in-between them]  I'll bring everything you see here... *Plus*, everything you don't!

• Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : [Poison Ivy is in her cell at Arkham Asylum plucking petals off a flower]  He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me.

  [Poison Ivy eats a petal] 

  Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : .

  Mr. Freeze : Not!

  [Mr. Freeze appears in the cell wearing his cryosuit] 

  Mr. Freeze : Surprise! I'm you're new cellmate.

  [Poison Ivy chuckles nervously] 

  Mr. Freeze : And I've come to make your life a living hell. Prepare for a bitter harvest.

  [Mr. Freeze approaches Poison Ivy] 

  Mr. Freeze : Winter has come at last.

  [Poison Ivy shakes fearfully] 

• Dr. Pamela Isley : You monster. How could you?

  Doctor Jason Woodrue : Our original sponsor had no stomach for military applications. He cut the funding for our work.

  Dr. Pamela Isley : Our work?

  Doctor Jason Woodrue : But without your research, I could never have come this far. Join me. The two of us entwined, side by side...

  Dr. Pamela Isley : Join you? I have spent my life trying to protect plants from extinction, and now you corrupt my research into some maniacal scheme for world domination? When I get through, you won't be able to get a job teaching high school chemistry. Do you hear me, you... PSYCHO?

• Doctor Jason Woodrue : Dr. Isley?

  Poison Ivy : Mmm?

  Doctor Jason Woodrue : Pamela?

  Poison Ivy : Mm-hmm.

  Doctor Jason Woodrue : You look great. Especially for a dead woman.

• Ivy : There's just something about an anatomically correct rubber suit that puts fire in a girl's lips.

  Batman : Why is it that all the beautiful ones are homicidal maniacs? Is it me?

• Poison Ivy : Brother, dear... I heard you were blue!

  Arkham Asylum Guard : [smitten]  Don't mind us, ma'am. You can speak freely!

  [Poison Ivy blows a cloud of lovedust in his face] 

  Poison Ivy : Oh I don't mind you at all!

  [she blows a second cloud into the second guard's face] 

  Poison Ivy : [walking and talking with the guards in tow]  Men! The most *absurd* of God's creatures!

  Poison Ivy : We give you life... and we can take it away *just* as easily!

  Arkham Asylum Guard , Arkham Asylum Guard : [sarcasticly]  Right. Whatever!

  [laughs] 

  Poison Ivy : [putting a hand on the second guard's face]  I really *am* to die for...

• Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : Come join me. My garden needs tending.

• Poison Ivy : I'm a lover, not a fighter. That's why every Poison Ivy action figure comes complete with him!

  [Bane attacks] 

• Poison Ivy : Batface and Birdbrain turned out to be much more resistant to my love-dust than expected... No matter. Next time I'll just give them a stronger dose. They'll literally be dying for me!

• Mr. Freeze : I need to get more diamonds from my hideout.

  Poison Ivy : I can help you grab your rocks.

• Poison Ivy : [to Robin]  One kiss, my love. For luck...

  [Poison Ivy passionately kisses Robin on the lips with a hint of a smile on her face] 

  Poison Ivy : [Pulling away with a look of mock-sympathy on her face]  Bad luck I'm afraid... Time to die, little Robin!

  Dick Grayson : I hate to disappoint you, but...

  [removes rubber lips from his mouth, revealing that Poison Ivy's kiss had no effect on him] 

  Dick Grayson : ...rubber lips are immune to your charms.

• [Robin gets up to fight Bane once again when] 

  Poison Ivy : Stop!

  [Robin stops as Poison Ivy blows lovedust in his face] 

  Poison Ivy : [she backs a dumbstruck Robin against a railing]  Living in the shadow of the big, bad Bat!

  Poison Ivy : [putting her arms on his shoulders]  You don't need him. *You're* the star!

  Poison Ivy : I can see it now! Your own *big*... *bright*... signal in the sky!

  Poison Ivy : [lustfully, putting her arms around his neck]  Let me guide you...

  [Batman's fight with Bane is going unnoticed by Poison Ivy and Robin. Batman is winning] 

  Poison Ivy : [Poison Ivy moves in to kiss him]  Let me kiss you...

• [Poison Ivy is disguised as Pamela Isley. She addresses Gordon with her back to him] 

  Poison Ivy : [Over]  ... Comissioner Gordon.

  Commissioner James Gordon : [He acknowledges her]  Yes?

  Poison Ivy : [She faces him in turn, seductively]  I've always wondered... where does that big, old Bat-light come from?

  [She blows a cloud of love-dust in his face from an ivy-leaf compact; Gordon is suddenly enamoured by her] 

  Commissioner James Gordon : [Struggling to keep his composure]  Why... it's... right on top of police headquarters!

  Poison Ivy : [Ivy beams seductively as she leads Gordon away like a puppy dog]  I'd just *love* to see it! But you probably don't have access...

  Commissioner James Gordon : [Gordon falls for her trap]  Why, dear lady...

  Commissioner James Gordon : *I*... am the comissioner of the police, I have the keys...

  [he takes them out from his jacket] 

  Commissioner James Gordon : right here in my pocket. Would you like to see it?

  [Ivy towers over Gordon. Slowly she opens the case once more and languidly blows another cloud into the police chief's face; fully entrancing him into a love-drunk stupor] 

  Commissioner James Gordon : [weakly as Ivy claims the keys from his hand]  Who *are* you, dear lady...?

  [Her goal earned, Ivy prepares to administer the coup de grace. She leans in for a kiss] 

  Poison Ivy : [Stopping short]  On second thought, you're *way* too old for me!

  Commissioner James Gordon : [watching vainly as Ivy dashes off, leaving him alone]  No, I'm not... Please... come back...

• Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : Mammals, a day of reckoning is coming. That's right, the same plants and flowers that saw you crawl from the primordial soup will reclaim the planet. And there will be no-one to protect you.

  Gossip Gerty : You must be new in town. In Gotham City, Batman and Robin protect us... even from plants and flowers.

• Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy : Poison... Poison Ivy.

• Poison Ivy : Hi there.

  Robin : [walks over to Ivy]  Is your thumb the only part of you that's green?

  Poison Ivy : You will just *have* to find out!

  Robin : I want us to be together but, I also wanna make sure your serious about turning over a new leaf...

  Robin : [sits down beside her]  I need a sign.

  Poison Ivy : How about 'Slippery when Wet'?

  Robin : Of trust. Tell me your plan.

  Poison Ivy : Kiss me and I'll tell you.

  Robin : Tell me and I'll kiss you.

  Poison Ivy : Freeze has taken the new telescope and turned it into a giant freezing-gun. He's about to turn Gotham into an icecube.

  Robin : [he turns to go]  I've gotta stop him!

  Poison Ivy : [pulls him back to face her]  One kiss, my love... for luck.

• [talking about Mr. Freeze] 

  Poison Ivy : That's not a man. That is a God.

• Poison Ivy : Some lucky boy's about to hit the honey pot. The winner will receive an evening of my company. I'll bring everything you see here, plus, everything you don't.

• Poison Ivy : It took God seven days to create paradise. Let's see if I can do better.

• Poison Ivy : [to Robin]  Stop living in the shadow of the big bad bat. You don't need him. You're the star. I can see it now. Your own big bright signal in the sky. Let me guide you. Let me kiss you.