Get Bruce (1999)

Bruce Vilanch: Self

Quotes 

• Bruce Vilanch : I'm friendly with a lot of big stars. They're wonderful individuals mano a mano... but you don't get to be the biggest star in the world by really caring a lot about anything else but yourself... and becoming the biggest star in the world.

• Bruce Vilanch : [about the pay in the industry]  The bigger the show, the smaller the salary.

• Bruce Vilanch : [when he won his Emmy]  I'm very sorry I didn't have to sleep around to win this award.

• Bruce Vilanch : Actually everything gets revised 4,000 times. I mean there's no writing. There's only rewriting.

• Steven Seagal : Are you sort of rewriting? 'Cause I should get in on that.

  Bruce Vilanch : Yeah!

  Steven Seagal : Asshole writer that I am.

  Bruce Vilanch : Oh, I'm in that guild.

  Steven Seagal : Yeah, I'm in that fuckin' guild too.

  Bruce Vilanch : Asshole writers of America.

  Steven Seagal : The Cocksucker Assholes of America.

  Salma Hayek : I'm not. I need you guys here.

  Steven Seagal : [to Bruce]  Don't forget the cocksuckers.

  Bruce Vilanch : Would I forget the cocksucker part? Surely you've heard.

  [all three laughs]