Red Dwarf: Smeg Ups (1994 Video)

Craig Charles: Lister, Self

Quotes 

• Craig Charles : [in character as Lister]  What, luck is a virus?

  Robert Llewellyn : [in character as Kryten]  A positive virus which most human beings er...

  [forgets the rest of his line] 

  Robert Llewellyn : Contract, or something like that. Wibbly-wobbly-oobly-boobly-boo. Bibbly-bobbly-boo.

  Craig Charles : Well, you haven't got it then, have ya?

• [Robert Llewellyn has fluffed a line again] 

  Craig Charles : Get the lines right, Rob, there's a bag of chips in it for ya!

• [Craig picks his nose and eats it] 

  Craig Charles : [points to his other nostril]  Saving this one til after. Got a bigger one here. That was the starter, this is the main course.

  Robert Llewellyn : What we don't want to know is where the sweets come from.

• [filming the scene in 'Meltdown' where Lister and the Cat have teleported into a chimney] 

  Danny John-Jules : [in character as the Cat]  Where are we?

  Craig Charles : [in character as Lister]  Dunno.

  [lights his lighter and holds it up to the wall] 

  Craig Charles : Stone.

  [he taps the wall. It makes a hollow noise indicating that it's made of wood rather than stone. He smirks then starts corpsing, blowing the take. A crew member dabs his face. Danny laughs] 

  Craig Charles : [to someone off-camera]  They were going to sort that out in the dub!

• Craig Charles : [as Lister]  The Vindaloovian empire has pledged to exterminate them all.

  [He touches the eyeball on his chin with his tongue]