. . . ALL-STAR MELODY MASTERS was carefully crafted (from archival footage) by the U.S. War Department censors primarily for the benefit of they "who were about to die" to provide a foretaste of Heaven (as recognized by the American Mainstream). This being the Land of Puritans, MELODY MASTERS is NOT a salacious parade of 70 virgins. Rather, it begins with the Beguine, courtesy of Hal Kemp. (Oh, but there IS one lady here, whirling in a slit skirt.) At the two minute, two second mark, those outbound swabs and fly-boys, G.I.s and Marines find a mute and pointlessly spinning gal in sequins "just one of those things." Then 4:12 into this valedictory, Skinnay Ennis' female singer says, "Let's Do It." Skinnay's vocalist might not have been very skinny, but boy, could she wink. ("Goldfish in the privacy of bowls" may do it, but the mustached guy to the singer's left wearing a three-piece suit, eyeglasses, and a bow-tie seems light years away from doing it.) After six minutes of females in the spotlight, MASTERS rises to a higher (or post-climactic) level with Rubinoff and his violin. But if you look closely, his back-ups include a female harpist (leaving MASTERS only 66 women short of a Middle Eastern send-off).
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