The Canadian Conspiracy (1986 TV Movie)

Leslie Nielsen: Self

Quotes 

• [Eugene Levy claims Leslie Nielsen called him and convinced him to stay in the US despite his homesickness for Canada] 

  Leslie Nielsen : I called him and told HIM not to leave? I'll tell you something. If I had ever called him for any reason, I'd be calling him to tell him TO LEAVE! And that's the truth of it so you know I'm not lying.

• John Candy : Eugene Levy? I don't know anybody named Eugene Levy.

  Leslie Nielsen : Eugene Levy? No!

  Anne Murray : I don't know Eugene Levy at all.

  Dave Thomas : If Candy says he doesn't know him, that's good enough for me. I don't know him either. Sorry, pal.

• Eugene Levy : What can I say? Leslie Nielsen is LYING!

  Leslie Nielsen : I did not call Eugene Levy, whoever he may be.

  Eugene Levy : He did.

  Leslie Nielsen : I didn't.

  Eugene Levy : He did.

  Leslie Nielsen : I didn't.

  Eugene Levy : DID!

  Leslie Nielsen : Didn't.

  Eugene Levy : DID!

  Leslie Nielsen : Didn't.

  Eugene Levy : DID!

  Leslie Nielsen : Didn't.

  [pause] 

  Leslie Nielsen : I never called him.

  Eugene Levy : Well, he's a big fat liar.

• Narrator : WHAT is Leslie Nielsen hiding from the American public?

  American : What's going on? We have a right to know the truth!

  Leslie Nielsen : All right, I'm going to level with you all. The most important thing is that you remain *calm*. There is *no reason* to panic.

  [as he continues speaking, his nose continues to grow] 

  Narrator : WHO is Leslie Nielsen trying to PROTECT?

  [cut to Eric Nielsen, Deputy Prime Minister of Canada and Minister of Defence] 

  Leslie Nielsen : Uh, I don't think so. Any connection between my brother, the Minister of Defence, and the success I've had here in America. No connection, at all.