Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn (2002–2004)
Nick Di Paolo: Self
Quotes
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Nick DiPaolo : The only advice I ever got from my dad is this: sex is like pizza, even when it's bad you still gotta pay for it.
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Nick DiPaolo : I don't think doodie comes out of her
[Brittany Spears']
Nick DiPaolo : butt. I think it's more like strawberry yogurt.
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Nick DiPaolo : I was born gay, but 8 months of breast feeding wiped that right out. I'm just glad my Dad wasn't walking around naked when I was teething.
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[Slogans for the war in Iraq to be printed on t-shirts]
Nick DiPaolo : Roses are red, violets are blue, lets hang Saddam by his nuts, and the French bastard too.
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Nick DiPaolo : Jessica baby you should be with me because I know how to treat a lady especially a retarded one... you screw her then give her a big red balloon
