- [Murdock is trying to pick the lock on the door of a small town store]
- Murdock: Face usally does this, makes it look real easy. An honest man doesn't really have the knack for this sort of thing...
- Boy George: Yeah, but who needs honesty?
- [lifts his foot and kicks the door open]
- [Murdock, with help from Boy George, has disguised himself as a pregnant woman in order to gain entry to the jail-house]
- Murdock: Herbert, open up, darling, its Cynthia!
- Hannibal: Cynthia, go away!
- Murdock: Herbert, oh Herbert, we have to talk, for the baby!
- B.A. Baracus: Baby? what's that fool talking about?
- Face: Let's open up and find out!
- [Murdock enters the jail-house]
- Murdock: [Lifting up the dress] Hold your breath, and remember your exercises.
- [In a whisper]
- Murdock: Explosives!
- Hannibal: [Collecting the explosives] Great, Murdock, just great
- Face: You know, Murdock, you look more attractive to me as a woman than you do as a man!
- Murdock: Face, we haven't got time for that. Boy George is waiting behind the sheriff's office - we've got to go!
- [Hannibal, Face and B.A. have been locked in a small-town jailhouse by a fake sheriff, who then leaves with all his deputies]
- Face: Why would they lock us up then take off?
- Hannibal: They've probably gone to tell the townsfolk that *we* stole their money. Make a great diversion - the bad guys get away, while the locals start looking at us, and throwing ropes over tree limbs.
- Face: Makes sense!
- Hannibal: I think we need to figure a way out of this jail, guys!
- B.A. Baracus: That's why we brought you along, Hannibal. That's you're department!
- Hannibal: Okay, the Hannibal Smith Ideas Department is now open for suggestions!
- B.A. Baracus: That's not an idea, Hannibal!
- Face: [Walking to the bars and taking a small pouch from his pocket] Well, I have an idea.
- Hannibal: [Looking at the pouch] A set of lock picks! You know, sometimes Face, your sense of larceny is your most attractive trait!
- Face: I know!
- Hannibal: The Hannibal Smith Idea Department is now open for suggestions.
- B.A. Baracus: That's not an idea, Hannibal.
- Face: Well guys,
- [sighs]
- Face: ... I have an idea.
- [produces a small bag from his pocket]
- Hannibal: A set of lockpicks.
- Face: Hm hmm.
- Hannibal: Face, sometimes you're sense of larceny is your most attractive trait.
- Face: I know.
- Murdock: Remi St. Starland here.
- Chuck Danford: [laughs] That's a funny name!
- Murdock: Thank you, made it up myself.
- Face: Wait a minute, see I, I agreed to book Cowboy George...
- Boy George: Well, I'm Boy George and I agreed to play the Arizona Forum.
- Face: Forum, ah, well there's no Forum here, I mean this is a bar, this is a dance hall, it's called the 'Floor'em'.
- Chuck Danford: Okay partner, let me say this so you hear. I want Cowboy George. I don't want no English glitter prince. Now Cowboy George shows up, or you show up in a concrete bathrobe at the bottom of Frasier Dam.
- B.A. Baracus: Hey Hannibal, why is Face out there spending all our money. That ain't right.
- Hannibal: Well ever since he took that showbusiness accountant course, he's been in a fiscal Twilight Zone.
- Hannibal: Face is trying to get something going between jobs, I mean we all got our outside interests. You got your daycare center, Murdock's got his psychosis, I got my acting.
- B.A. Baracus: Hannibal, you ain't no actor, you don't find actors dressing up like lizards.
- Hannibal: That's a very narrow interpretation, B.A. Boris Karloff wouldn't like it.
- [Hannibal, Face and B.A. have left the cell, only to find they can't leave because the jail-house surrounded by angry townspeople]
- Face: [Walking in from the cell area] I just found the real sheriff - dead!
- B.A. Baracus: Oh, man, they're going to think we killed him!
- Hannibal: Well, I admit that this situation has some ragged edges, but I can't think with all this noise!