- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: You must be Joey; I'm Bo. For a second there, she thought I was you.
- Imposter Joey: Yeah, well, the elevator doesn't stop at every floor, if you know what I mean.
- Imposter Joey: Mother, you're acting crazy.
- Irene: Why not? You'll just have to get used to me again.
- Imposter Joey: You keep shoes in the fridge, you cha-cha with some kid. When I walked though the door yesterday, you didn't even recognize me. I'd call that crazy.
- Irene: What kind of tea do you want?
- Imposter Joey: Forget the tea! Think where it might be. It's half a million bucks. If we don't find it, we'll lose the house and you'll have to go to that old folks home.
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: He said he'd been in Florida.
- Shirley Holmes: He hasn't been near the sun. He's sallow, possibly malnourished, his clothes are years out of date. He doesn't even know you can't put a metal pot in the microwave... Bo, he's been in jail!
- Shirley Holmes: You shared a cell with Joey Babbage, didn't you? That's how you found out about the diamonds!
- Imposter Joey: Confession's not my style, kid.
- [Shirley tries to buy a cake with diamonds baked inside]
- Shirley Holmes: I'd like to buy Number 6, please.
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: Mm-mmm!
- Shirley Holmes: What?
- [Bo spits out a diamond]
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: We'd like to buy Number 4.
- Shirley Holmes: And you kept right on eating to fake out the imposter.
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: *Oh yeah.*
- Shirley Holmes: Excellent!
- Joey Babbage: You the kid that gave back the diamonds?
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: Uhh, yeah.
- Joey Babbage: Do you know what they were worth?
- [Bo nods]
- Joey Babbage: Ow. I guess I won't miss what I never had.
- [last lines]
- Irene: [referring to Shirley] You know, I like your friend. She's a bit daffy...
- Joey Babbage: Come on, Mom. They're going to start without us.
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: Later.