- Ignignokt: A real warrior would have jumped on it like a beast... before it went straight up to $99.99!
- Ignignokt: Alert him to the fact that we will throw in a wacky wall walker, his choice of five colors, if that's what it takes for the dog to bite.
- Master Shake: He has a friend that made over $2 million doing this out of the house!
- Ignignokt: That is very extremely true.
- Ignignokt: First we must train you. You can't go into battle like that.
- Err: He's right!
- Ignignokt: You would instantly turn to vapor.
- Err: Oh what you need is our free warrior kit!
- Ignignokt: Oh most definitely.
- Err: We're selling it, and you're buying it.
- Ignignokt: It's got the helmet, energy bars, electric shoes, Gorgotron repellent, Moon Master stickers, and now for the first time... instructional video.
- Err: And it's all free!
- Meatwad: M'kay how do i get that?
- Ignignokt: You pay far out the ass for it!
- Err: It's just three easy installments of $29.99!
- Ignignokt: Unless you want our race to die, which it seems like you do.
- Meatwad: Oh no, no. I don't want that... But I thought you said it was free?
- Ignignokt: It was free. A true warrior would have jumped on it like a beast... before it went straight up to $99.99!
- Meatwad: Well damn, I guess I do need training
- Err: What you need, is recognition!
- Ignignokt: For a one time charge, get your name placed in this handsome leather-bound volume of Who's Who Among Moonmasters.
- Err: You're the only one, and you're on page one!
- Meatwad: Hey you know what, this a pretty good deal.
- Err: Yes it is, Cathy.