Arrested Development (TV Series)

Pier Pressure (2004)

Jason Bateman: Michael Bluth

Quotes 

• Michael : Your Uncle Gob seems to think that he saw you down at the docks today. Was that you?

  George Michael : No. No. Maybe it was the other George Michael. You know, the singer-songwriter.

  Michael : Yeah, that makes sense.

• Michael : [after confronting his son about marijuana]  He's lying to me! I don't believe it! Where the hell is this family's morality?

  Gob : [lets out a puff of marijuana smoke]  I don't know. Oh, it's... cold out.

• Michael : You taught me a lesson about not teaching lessons?

  George Sr. : That was my last lesson.

• [Michael wants to teach his son a lesson like the ones his father used to teach him] 

  Michael Bluth : I need the guy with the fake arm, J. Walter Weatherman.

  George Bluth, Sr. : Oh, he's dead. You killed him when you left the door open with the air conditioning on.

• Michael : [about George Michael's test]  A-?

  George Michael : Are you proud of me?

  Michael : Very proud... minus.

• Michael : [after strippers dressed as cops have taken off their uniforms]  You knew all along, didn't you?

  George Michael : Sorta. One of the hot cops was my choir teacher.

• Michael : Well, it's not like you made a commitment to her or anything.

  Buster : No, not a commitment... but I did refer to it as "our nausea, " but that was when we were going at it pretty hot and heavy.

  Michael : Well, now it's my nausea.

• George Michael : [Arguing with his math book]  Dumb, dumb George Michael, dumb...

  Michael : Hey, calm down there, you two; it's just a math problem.

  George Michael : Yeah, but if I fail math then there goes my chances to get a good job and have a happy life full of hard work, like you always say, right Dad?

• Michael : [to George Michael]  I want you to take the rest of the day off. Here's 20 bucks, buy something you don't need, be a kid, make mistakes, get in trouble.

  Buster : Yes, make a mistake. Take 225 from me.

• Michael : [referring to George Michael smoking pot]  All I know is that this has been going on forever. His eyes are red, his grades are slipping.

  Gob : I heard about the A minus.

• Michael : I'm gonna give you the cash, but, in return, I get to ask you for a favor sometime.

  Gob : My gut is telling me "No," but my gut is also very hungry. All right, I'll do it.