- Daisy Moses: [wearing a mini skirt] No 400 year old ghost will mistake me for a grandmother in this.
- Jane Hathaway: Chief, what exploded?
- Milburn Drysdale: Granny!
- Jane Hathaway: She has a gun?
- Milburn Drysdale: She has a cannon!
- Daisy Moses: She'll be lookin' for a grandmother, and after 400 years, her eyes ain't gonna be so good.
- Elly May Clampett: Jethro, you dumb ol' black knight coward, you done kept me from meetin' the queen.
- Jethro Bodine: Every night, Anne Boleyn is rollin' her head up and down the halls. The whole palace sounds like a bowlin' alley.
- Milburn Drysdale: Lady Clementine hasn't eaten in 400 years.
- Jed Clampett: 400 years?
- Daisy Moses: She'll be hungrier than Jethro.