- Thelma "Mama" Harper: It is people like her that are causing the downfall of this whole country. If I was your mother...
- Midge Gibson: [interrupting] Well, you are not my mother, Mrs. Harper, so I have no emotional objection to punching you right in the nose!
- Thelma "Mama" Harper: Are you going to let her talk to me like that, Eunice?
- Eunice Higgins: Go, go, go.
- Midge Gibson: Now I have made many mistakes in my life, but I have never been deliberately malicious and-and cruel and if you're an example of decency, sister, thank God I'm indecent and you
- [referring to and pointing at Ed, Eunice's husband]
- Midge Gibson: ... you weren't so high and mighty in high school when you-you were in the back seat of that convertible with me on that double date with Gigi and-and-and you practically tore off my best sweater!
- Eunice Higgins: Oh, Ed!
- Midge Gibson: Yeah! I finally got away and after that, he ran after Gigi! Jim had to throw him out of the car! Oh, Eunice, I'm sorry.
- Eunice Higgins: Oh, shoot. Who cares? I'm just surprised he ever had that much energy.
- Midge Gibson: Listen, Eunice, I'm going to have to leave. I've had enough of uh... the family unit and the backbone of the country for the moment, but I want to tell you I-I just want to say 'Thank you!' because I was feeling very depressed about my life and now I feel a whole lot better!
- Eunice Higgins: Oh. Midge! Oh, Midge, I'm so sorry it's got to end this way! I'm so sorry you got to leave!
- Midge Gibson: I'm so sorry you got to stay.