Quotes
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Pat Brody : Do you realize you're thirty-four and being sent to bed?
Joel Larsen : No, Pat, that never occurred to me. You must be some kind of super-genius!
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Isabelle Meyers : You're not supposed to sign your mom's name.
Pat Brody : She knows I do it. I sign it better than she does.
Isabelle Meyers : That's weird.
Joel Larsen : Says the girl from the Olympic cookie family.
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[Bill rips apart the forms. Joel has a flashback to more recent time, while he is with his therapist]
Therapist : If you could go back in time as a rational adult - what would you tell your father?
[back in 1980]
Joel Larsen : THIS IS TOTALLY LAME! AND YOU'RE STUPID!
[tramps out of the room]
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Bill Larsen : You have something you want to say to me?
Joel Larsen : Yes. I'm sorry.
[pauses]
Joel Larsen : I'm sorry you're such a tyrant.
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Isabelle Meyers : Why can't you just get along? We never argue in my family.
Joel Larsen : That's because your family immigrated from Candyland.
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Bill Larsen : Now, since you're an adult, that means you're gonna live on your own. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!
Joel : [voice over] Do not back down.
Joel Larsen : If that's the way you want it, I'll be out in 20 minutes!
Bill Larsen : I'll go help you pack!
Joel Larsen : FINE BY ME!
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Joel Larsen : It's like you live by yourself! Man, I've never realized it, but you have a life.
Pat Brody : [unenthusiastic] Yeah.
Joel Larsen : My dad expects me to come home my the tail between my legs. But I don't think so! It's like I escaped from prison and landed out here, in paradise. A prison that wishes to say a word... FREEDOM!
[Pat looks at him]
Joel Larsen : It's from Braveheart. In 20 years you'll say it everytime you put your top down on your Porsche.
Pat Brody : I HATE my older self.
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Cheryl Larsen : Joel, Mom and Dad are driving me crazy. You have to come home.
Joel Larsen : Hm. So you miss me?
Cheryl Larsen : I didn't say that.
Joel Larsen : Oh, well, you better, if you want me to come home.
Cheryl Larsen : Forget it!
Joel Larsen : Let me guess... Without me there, all eyes are on you.
Cheryl Larsen : That's not so bad.
Joel Larsen : Every move you make, they'll be watching you with full, undivided attention. There is no place to hide! But that's okay, 'cause you're a... good... girl.
Cheryl Larsen : Okay, okay, you win. I miss you.
Joel Larsen : Oh, that's really sweet... But I'm still not coming home.
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Pat Brody : I could have sworn I paid that bill.
Joel Larsen : Doesn't your mom take care of that stuff?
Pat Brody : Yeah.
Joel Larsen : Pat?
Pat Brody : God, Joel, wake up. You think I got it made, but I don't. I-I pay the bills, I bounce the checkbook, make sure there's food in the refrigerator... I keep this house going!
Joel Larsen : I... I didn't know that.
Pat Brody : 'Cause I've always hidden it from you, stupid! And now, here you are, complaining about Bill. But when are you going to realize that you're the one who has it all made? Not me! You have somebody who looks after you.
Joel Larsen : You-you have your mom...
Pat Brody : And I love her, but... let's face it. She sucks at being a parent. For god's sake, I've got purple hair, and she doesn't even say anything about it!
Joel Larsen : But she's letting you doing your own thing...
Pat Brody : You don't get it, do you? It's nice to have someone that bosses you around once in a while. It shows that they care! For being thirty-four years old, you don't know anything. I'll be at your house.
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Joel Larsen : Isabelle, what are you doing here?
Isabelle Meyers : You were right, things are too cheery at my house. My dad played the Olympic theme on the trumpet, and I had to get out of there.