- Joel: [voice over] If I had a dollar for every time my parents argued about money... well, they wouldn't be arguing about money.
- Joel Larsen: Dad, I don't think the type writers are gonna be the future. Personal computers are getting very popular.
- Bill Larsen: Ah, computers are a fad!
- Isabelle Meyers: When is the school gonna get an A.P. Physics class?
- Joel Larsen: As soon as they find a second student who wants one!
- Mr. Jenkins: Great work! I haven't even given you the list of leaves yet, and already you've opened three major accounts. How did you to know to call them?
- Joel Larsen: Well, I've been sent from the future to sell paper.
- [Joel and Pat are doing a Blues Brothers dance, but Joel's dance is rather unenthusiastic. He quickly stops]
- Joel Larsen: I-I don't know, there's so much people around, and...
- Isabelle Meyers: ...and it looks like you're having a spasm attack.
- Karen Larsen: [to Bill] Tough day at the office?
- Joel Larsen: Oh, you do not know the half of it! The phone never stopped ringing.
- [Bill and Karen looks curiously at him when he taps some scotch into a glass. He is about to drink it]
- Bill Larsen: What do you think you're doing?
- Joel Larsen: Oh...! Um... You could probably use this, huh, Dad?
- Joel Larsen: No, no, you're not getting it! I'm totally stressed out! I'm cutting class, I'm not seeing my friends... and worst of all, I'm starting to lose my hair! I mean, look at this... this isn't supposed to happen until I'm twenty-four! I shouldn't be worrying about sales quarters or expense reports. I'm just a kid! Mr. Jenkins... I quit. God, that felt great. I hate this job, I've always hated this job! There's got to be something better for me out there.
- Joel Larsen: Not a lot of people at thirty-four can say that they've had the same best friend since the first grade. You... you've always stood by me. Even when I grew that I grew that ponytail. So of all people, what was I thinking, letting you down? And more importantly, what was I thinking missing the Blues Brothers? I'm sorry, Pat.
- Pat Brody: I just have one question for you: "What kind of biscuit bounces off your stomach and don't come back?"
- Joel Larsen: "Well, Jake... I think that'd be a..."
- Joel Larsen, Pat Brody: "R-r-r-r-rubber biscuit!"
- [does the Blues Brothers dance]