Family Guy (TV Series)

To Love and Die in Dixie (2001)

Seth MacFarlane: Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin, Stewie Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, Tom Tucker, Announcer, Virgil, Willie Tanner, Pope, Agent Harris, Clerk, Alf, ATM Cashier, Dixie DJ

Photos 

Quotes 

• Peter Griffin : I dunno, Brian, maybe Lois is right. Maybe it is time for me to get a job.

  Brian Griffin : Yeah, too bad you always blow it in the interview.

  [Peter is seen at a job interview] 

  Interviewer : Okay, Peter, where do you see yourself in five years?

  Peter Griffin : [thinking]  Don't say doing your wife, don't say doing your wife, don't say doing your wife.

  Peter Griffin : [out loud]  Doing your...

  [sees a picture of the interviewer's son] 

  Peter Griffin : son?

• [Peter and Brian have just jumped their car off a flatbed truck like The Dukes of Hazzard] 

  Peter Griffin : Oh, man. That was great. Hey, maybe next time we can get Meg to be Boss Hogg and Chris can be Anus.

  Brian Griffin : Enis.

  Peter Griffin : What'd I say?

  Brian Griffin : Anus.

  [Peter laughs hysterically] 

• Peter Griffin : [clearing his throat]  Excuse me but I'm pretty sure the north won the war.

  [dead silence] 

• Stewie Griffin : [playing Banjo and Singing]  Heard her on my C.B. said her name was Mimi, sounded like an angel come to Earth.

  Hillbilly Band : [singing]  Come to Earth.

  Stewie Griffin : [singing]  But when i went to meet her, boy you should have seen her, twice as big as me, three times the girth.

  Hillbilly Band : [singing]  Times the Girth.

  Stewie Griffin : [singing]  Oh my big baby loves to eat.

  Hillbilly Band : [singing]  Loves to eat.

  Stewie Griffin : A big old Budda belly and breasts way past her feet. Oh my big baby loves to e-e-eat, my big old fat-ass baby loves to eat.

  [finishes playing] 

  Stewie Griffin : I've got blisters on me fingers!

• Peter Griffin : Hey uh Lois, I don't get how this works. It's just a hole. I don't think it goes anywhere. No, it definitely doesn't go anywhere.

  [Bird hits the outhouse, knocking it over] 

  Peter Griffin : Ugh! Oh God! It's everywhere! Ugh! It's in my raccoon wounds! Oh God!

• Meg Griffin : [opening the closet door]  Someone's in the closet!

  Jeff Foxworthy : You know you're a redneck when your gun rack has a gun rack on it.

  Stewie Griffin : You suck!

  [slams the closet door shut] 

• Lois Griffin : [the Griffin family first enter their new dilapidated house]  Ughhh, what's that smell?

  Brian Griffin : It's either bad meat or good cheese.