- Julia Wilcox: Hello, Frasier. Wow, who's this? Your stunt double?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: It's my brother Niles.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: I'm hashing over an ethical dilemma, so I think I could use some black coffee.
- Coffee Guy: What size would you like?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Uh, I've got a lot to ponder, so I think a large.
- Coffee Guy: I'm afraid we don't have large, sir. We have piccolo, macho, mucho and mucho macho.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: I see. Uh, do you happen to know what size would correspond to a Nervosa grande?
- Coffee Guy: No. But our mucho is about the same as the semi-colossal over at Don't Spill the Beans.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Ah, ah, all right. I know that their colossal is comparable to a Nervosa grande, so the semi-colossal would be three quarters of a colossal, so the mucho and the semi-colossal would be equivalent... so I should have the mucho macho. But only fill it five-eighths.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: [Frasier has just been told by his accountant that he must learn to curb his spending] All right, the point is I have to come up with a plan. A plan... Perhaps a ruminative latte will do me some good at Nervosa.
- Martin Crane: What? You just had a whole new espresso machine shipped here from Italy!
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Yes, well I'm waiting for the cups!
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Oh, thank you, Steve. I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but I'm afraid my brother and I will not be the everyday stalwarts I predicted we would be.
- Steve: [Flatly] Damn. Every time I open my heart...