Get Smart (TV Series)

The Day Smart Turned Chicken (1965)

Don Adams: Maxwell Smart

Photos 

Quotes 

• Maxwell Smart : [Cowboy has jumped from a window, certain there is a KAOS truck full of matrasses waiting for him below]  Missed it by that much.

• Maxwell Smart : Now remember doctor, I want you to wipe everything from your memory.

  Dr. Fish : Wipe everything from my memory. Eh... even my twelve dollars?

  Maxwell Smart : Especially your twelve dollars.

• Mrs. Dawson : Do you know what time it is, Mr. Smart?

  Maxwell Smart : [thinking she has a sprained ankle]  Yes, but I knew that you'd still be up with your ankle.

  Mrs. Dawson : I'm rarely up without it.

  Maxwell Smart : Now eh, I hope you didn't have to walk all the way to the door.

  Mrs. Dawson : No, I took a bus from the living room.

• Maxwell Smart : [the Cowboy is about to jump out of a window]  Don't be a fool. It's five stories straight down to a hard pavement.

  Cowboy : I'm in a hurry.

  Maxwell Smart : Oh. Well, that is the quickest way down.

• Maxwell Smart : [having just learned the Chief's real first name]  Thaddeus? Sorry about that, Chief...

• Maxwell Smart : Listen, I once knew a guy who had a knife in his heart, and lived, for 15 years! Would you believe it? 15 years!

  Cowboy : That's hard to believe.

  Maxwell Smart : Would you believe 15 minutes?

  Cowboy : I don't think so.

  Maxwell Smart : How about a pin in his nose?

  Cowboy : You're just trying to cheer me up.

• Maxwell Smart : [talking to the Chief on his plant phone]  Hello Chief? Max. Eh, listen chief, you know that dead cowboy I told you about?

  Maxwell Smart : [pause]  Yeah, well, he's dead again.

  Maxwell Smart : [another pause]  That's not nice, Chief.

• Maxwell Smart : Mr. Ambassador, they're trying to kill you. The dead cowboy told me.

  [pointing his finger at the Ambassador's chest for emphasis] 

  Maxwell Smart : They killed him twice!

• Maxwell Smart : Well, your honor, my case is complete. This is your villain. This is your culprit

  [the Cowboy draws a gun] 

  Maxwell Smart : and this is his gun.

• Maxwell Smart : [after the cowboy falls dead for the 3rd time]  Are you finished?