Gilmore Girls (TV Series)

The Deer Hunters (2000)

Lauren Graham: Lorelai Gilmore

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lorelai : I hate when I'm an idiot and don't know it. I like to be aware of my idiocy, to really revel in it, take pictures. I feel we've missed a prime Christmas card opportunity.

• Lorelai : Sweetie you're never gonna find the deer.

  Rory : Well I'm gonna try.

  Lorelai : Well I'm in heels!

  Rory : Well stay in the car.

  Lorelai : It's dangerous in the car with all the kamikaze deer running around...

  [getting out of the car] 

  Rory : I have to find it.

  Lorelai : Alright, wait up! So what does the deer look like? Huh? Does it have any distinguishing marks - besides the word 'Jeep' imprinted on its forehead?

• [Drella plays "Iron Man" on her harp] 

  Lorelai : No Black Sabbath.

  Drella : No one's listening!

  Lorelai : No Black Sabbath, no Steely Dan, no Boston, and no Queen.

  Drella : What happened to make you so cold?

• Rory : Thanks though.

  Lorelai : For what?

  Rory : For yelling at the Headmaster the way you did.

  Lorelai : Oh, I didn't yell at him.

  Rory : You called him 'il duce'!

  Lorelai : Which means 'kind sir' in Cantonese.

• Lorelai : You couldn't tell me? You tell me everything.

  Rory : It was too humiliating.

  Lorelai : Honey, you once told me you loved _Saved By the Bell_. What could be more humiliating than that?

• Lorelai : I'll still love you... even if you can't support me in my old age in the fabulous manner to which I plan on growing accustomed.

• Lorelai : [disgusted by the taste of the coffee]  Jesus, Mary, Joseph and a camel!

  [everybody turns their head] 

  Lorelai : Really bad coffee.

• [during Lorelai's outburst in Headmaster Charleston's office] 

  Max Medina : [to Headmaster Charleston]  I didn't call this place a rathole.

  Lorelai : No, it's true. I added that.

• Rory : A "D" at Stars Hollow is like an "F" at Chilton. It's worse. It's like a "G"... or a "W".

  Lorelai : So I'm guessing the spelling test didn't go well, either?

• Drella : How do you feel about Pat Benatar?

  Lorelai : Great. Can she play the harp?

• Lorelai : Ooh, hey, legal pads.

  Rory : No. Those are purple.

  Lorelai : Yes, purple is festive.

  Rory : I can't have purple.

  Lorelai : Yes you can, they're on sale.

  Rory : I'm going to a serious school now, I need serious paper.

  Lorelai : Paper's paper.

  Rory : Not at Chilton.

  Lorelai : All right, fine. Here is your serious paper.

  Rory : Thank you.

  Lorelai : Ooh, and here are you somber highlighters, your maudlin pencils, your manic-depressive pens...

  Rory : Mom...

  Lorelai : Now these erasers are on lithium, so they may seem cheerful but we actually caught them trying to shove themselves in the pencil sharpener earlier.

  Rory : I'm going home now.

  Lorelai : No wait! We're going to stage an intervention with the neon Post-Its and make them give up their wacky, crazy ways.

  Rory : You're never coming shopping with me again.