Gilmore Girls (TV Series)

There's the Rub (2002)

Alexis Bledel: Rory Gilmore

Photos 

Quotes 

• Paris : A tragic waste of paper.

  Jess : I can't BELIEVE you just said that.

  Paris : Well it's true. The Beats' writing was completely self-indulgent. I have one word for Jack Kerouac: Edit.

  Jess : It was not self-indulgent, The Beats believed in shocking people, stirring things up.

  Paris : They believed in drugs, booze, and petty crime.

  Rory : Well, then you could say that they exposed you to a world that you wouldn't have otherwise known. Isn't that what great writing is all about?

  Paris : That was not great writing. It was the National Enquirer of the 50's.

  Jess : You're cracked.

  Paris : Typical guy response. Worship Kerouac and Bukowski, God forbid you pick up anything by Jane Austen.

  Jess : Hey, I've read Jane Austen.

  Paris : You have?

  Jess : Yeah, and I think she would have liked Bukowski.

  Paris : What are you doing?

  Jess : Salt and pepper dip, only way to eat a fry.

  Paris : Really?

  Rory : It's fast food gospel.

  Paris : Mmmm. That's good. That's really, really good.

  Jess : [Phone rings, and Rory leaves to answer it]  Do you like hot sauce?

  Paris : I don't know, should I?

  Jess : I think it's wise.

• Jess : Okay, well give him my best, would you?

  [sees Dean on the front lawn] 

  Jess : Actually, I guess I could do that myself.

  Rory : Dean, Jess just came by to bring me some food.

  Jess : From Luke's.

  Rory : He wanted to make sure I ate.

  Jess : Luke did.

  Rory : Right, Luke did.

  Jess : Personally, I could care less if she eats.

  Rory : Yeah true, He could care less.

  Jess : I see you brought a little something, too. Is that ice cream? That's so nice. A tiny little ice cream package just big enough for two. Hey are you guys gonna feed each other? 'cause that's just so darn cute.

  [Dean steps onto the porch, looking down at Jess] 

  Jess : Oops, you're doing that towering over-me-thing. Huh. I tell you, you've really got that down. It helps that your 12 feet tall. But this whole Frankenstein scowl thing really adds to the whole...

  Rory : Jess!

  Jess : Okay, I'm going.

  [to Dean] 

  Jess : Look man, I really was just dropping off some food, so don't go all West Side Story on me, okay?

  Rory : [Jess leaves]  So do you want to

  [Dean heads inside] 

  Rory : come in?

• Paris : I'm not allowed to have Mac & Cheese.

  Rory : Splurge. Come on Paris, stay.

  Paris : Do you have a 24-hour pharmacy just in case I have an allergic reaction to something?

  Rory : Believe it or not, we do.

  Paris : Okay. Can I borrow your phone?

  Rory : It's by the door.

  [Paris leaves the room to call her nanny] 

  Jess : Interesting.

  Rory : What is?

  Jess : You think we need a chaperone.

  Rory : No, I don't.

  Jess : You just invited one.

  Rory : Just being polite. Paris is alone tonight and you yourself just said we have enough good for six.

  Jess : With me, it's down to four.

  Rory : With Paris around, it's down to two.

  Jess : Works out well.

  Rory : I think so.

  [Paris talks to her nanny excitedly about Mac & Cheese] 

• Jess : Delivery.

  Rory : What are you doing here?

  Jess : Well, Luke figured since you're alone tonight, thought maybe you wouldn't have any food in the house. So he sent over a care package.

  Rory : I don't need a care package. I ordered food from Sandeep's.

  Jess : Really? Planning on burning down the house afterwards?

  Rory : Jess...

  Jess : The only way to kill the smell. Where should I put this? Kitchen?

  Rory : Um, sure.

  Rory : [cut to kitchen]  God, how much food is in there? This could feed twelve!

  Jess : Excuse me, I've seen you eat.

  Rory : Fine, six.