Grey's Anatomy (TV Series)

Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer (2005)

Patrick Dempsey: Dr. Derek Shepherd

Quotes 

• [Room is filled with noisy children, playing, which continues throughout the scene] 

  Dr. Meredith Grey : Tim Epstein, 38, fell off the roof of his house.

  [One of his children is sitting on him, sticking a fake lizard to his forehead] 

  Tim Epstein : I was, uh, stringing Hanumas lights and a shingle came loose.

  Dr. Isobel 'Izzie' Stevens : Hanumas?

  Tim Epstein : Hanumas. Christmukkah. We go all out.

  Dr. Isobel 'Izzie' Stevens : [Smiling]  Awesome.

  Mrs. Epstein : He fell twelve feet.

  Tim Epstein : The good news is, my head broke my fall.

  [One of the children flings a fake lizard, which hits Derek in the face, who smiles in surprise] 

  Dr. Meredith Grey : Uh, there are no visible deformities, but he's definitely having some focal left arm weakness.

  Mrs. Epstein : He'll probably be fine. He's always been a little hard-headed.

  [Tim laughs, but seems to be in pain] 

  Dr. Derek Shepherd : Does your head hurt when you laugh?

  Tim Epstein : Is that a bad thing?

  Dr. Derek Shepherd : Do you wanna follow my finger with your eyes, please?

  Jake Epstein : [to Bailey]  I know karate.

  Dr. Miranda Bailey : [Flustered]  Hmm? Uh... You know, your husband might need a little, uh, quiet, so, there's a cafeteria right down the...

  Tim Epstein : No, no. Whoa. Let 'em stay. Pain or no, I don't wanna miss out on the holidays with my kids.

  [Izzie is playing with the kids] 

  Dr. Derek Shepherd : Who would like to take Mr., uhm, Epstein down for a CT?

  [Izzie's hand shoots up] 

  Dr. Derek Shepherd : Stevens it is.

  [Izzie grins] 

  Dr. Derek Shepherd : [Bailey walks up to the Chief who is surveying the OR board] 

  Dr. Richard Webber : Anxiety attacks, aneurysms and ulcers.

  Dr. Miranda Bailey : Must be December.

  Patricia : Chief, Adele just called.

  Dr. Richard Webber : Tell her I'm in...

  Patricia : She knows your not in surgery. And she said to tell you, quote, "We are going to our niece's school pageant this morning. You have known about it for months. And after what you pulled on Thanksgiving..." and then she, started using a great many words I don't feel comfortable repeating.

  Dr. Richard Webber : But I have seven surgeons on vacation...

  Patricia : And there was something about "divorce".

  Dr. Richard Webber : [to Dr. Bailey]  You'll have to cover my ulcer excision.

  Dr. Miranda Bailey : Yes, sir.

  [Chief and Patricia are walking away] 

  Dr. Richard Webber : The woman is unreasonable. When did watching a six-year-old dressed up like a wise man become... You couldn't hang up the phone?

• Dr. Derek Shepherd : Do you happen to know what time of year neurosurgeons are the busiest Dr. Stevens?

  Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens : There's a time of year?

  Dr. Derek Shepherd : There's no hard or fast rule, but brain injuries tend to pile up around the holidays. Like our friend here. Folks fall off their roofs while they string up lights. Or they go skating for the first time in a decade and break their heads open. And every year people drive through blizzards to get to parties where they kiss germ-infected strangers under poisonous mistletoe. And then they get so drunk that they smash their heads through their windshield on their way home. Like I said, there's no hard or fast rule.