How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)
Pilot (2005)
David Henrie: Son
Photos
Quotes
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Older Ted : Kids, I'm gonna tell you an incredible story. The story of how I met your mother.
Son : Are we being punished for something.
Older Ted : No.
Daughter : Yeah, is this gonna take awhile?
Older Ted : Yes. Twenty-five years ago, before I was "dad" I had this whole other life. I was 27, just starting out as an architect, living with your uncle Marshall. My life was good. Then your uncle Marshall went screwed the whole thing up.
[flash to 2005]
Marshall Eriksen : Will you marry me?
Ted : Yes! Perfect. You pop the champagne. You drink a toast. You have sex on the kitchen floor. Don't have sex on our kitchen floor.
Marshall Eriksen : Right. Got it. Thanks for helping me plan this out, Ted.
Ted : Are you kidding? It's you and Lily. I've been there for all the big you and Lily moments. The night you met, your first date... other firsts.
Marshall Eriksen : Yeah... sorry, we thought you were asleep.
Ted : It's physics, Marshall. If the bottom bunk moves, the top bunk moves too. Oh my God, you're getting engaged tonight.
Marshall Eriksen : Yeah. What are you doing tonight?
Older Ted : [V.O] What was I doing? Here, your uncle Marshall was taking the biggest step of his life and me? I'm calling up your uncle Barney.
Barney : Hey, so you know how I've always had a thing for half-Asian chicks? Well, now I've got a new thing. Lebanese chicks. Lebanese chicks are the new half-Asians.
Ted : Hey, you wanna do something tonight?
Barney : Okay, meet me at the bar in 10 minutes, and suit up!
Barney : [Ted walks in] Where's your suit? Just once, when I say, "suit up" I wish you'd put on a suit.
Ted : I did... that one time.
Barney : It was a blazer!