- Arthur: [Artie sees Hank lying in wait for him and asks impatiently] What is it?
- Hank Kingsley: Did Larry hire some black guy with no experience?
- Arthur: He worked for WPJP.
- Hank Kingsley: WPJP? What is that, excuse me, local shit affiliate? Did he even consider my sister?
- Arthur: Yes! She was too dumb.
- Hank Kingsley: [Hank feigns great offense] How can you say that about my sister?
- Arthur: Oh hell, cut the crap. That's not your sister. I saw you dry humping under the bleachers. Hey now!
- Hank Kingsley: All right, it's a young girl, I'm just trying to help her out...
- Arthur: Nice try, Hank. The job's gone.
- [Artie walks away]
- Hank Kingsley: Fucked by the black man, again!
- Beverly Barnes: Do you know any black writers, Phil?
- Phil: Yes, of course, I count many black writers among my closest friends.
- Beverly Barnes: But why don't we have black writers here working on the show?
- Phil: You don't know?
- Beverly Barnes: No, tell me.
- Phil: Oh Larry won't hire them. Firstly, I think it's terrible. I think it's unfortunate and embarassing for all of us. But as Larry said in the super secret memo: "If it ain't white, it ain't right".
- Beverly Barnes: You are such an asshole, Phil. You know that?
- Phil: Hmm hmm. If you're writing an article don't use my name.
- Beverly Barnes: Paula, why don't we have more black guests on the show?
- Paula: Cause... black people find Larry to be white.
- Larry Sanders: [after seeing Hank's "sister" audition with a fake British accent] I'm having a stroke...
- Arthur: Huh?
- Larry Sanders: Er... huh? Nothing.
- Arthur: But it was a great show!
- Larry Sanders: He's not supposed to ad-lib during a sketch. That thing he said about the salami stinking totally confused me and threw me off for the whole show.
- Hank Kingsley: I was overcomed by the stench.
- Larry Sanders: I smelled the stench and didn't think it was coming from the salami.
- Hank Kingsley: And where did you think it was coming from?
- Larry Sanders: From you.
- Arthur: Oh boys, c'mon. Settle down, it's nobody's fault.
- Hank Kingsley: Excuse me.
- Clyde: And Larry... he says he's for affirmative action? Too much affirmative talk and not enough action. He wouldn't even sign a fucking petition.
- Beverly Barnes: I can't work for Larry anymore.
- Paula: Baby, you're talking like it's friday but it's only wednesday.
- Beverly Barnes: I was talking to Larry just now. Would you excuse us, please?
- Arthur: What?
- Beverly Barnes: I would like a moment alone with my boss.
- Arthur: Without me?
- Beverly Barnes: Yes.
- Larry Sanders: Ok, let's not overreact, please.
- Beverly Barnes: [Arthur leaves] Thank you. Excuse us.
- Larry Sanders: Artie? Artie?
- Beverly Barnes: Black people will never have as much experience as white people because up to 10 years ago black people had no props.