Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (TV Series)

Hysteria (1999)

Richard Belzer: Detective John Munch

Quotes 

• John Munch : Miss Webber was told to disrobe, put her feet up in stirrups, and try to picture David Hasselhoff on Baywatch.

  Defense Attorney : Objection! Your honor, this witness is not qualified to testify on the treatment for hysteria.

  John Munch : Actually, sir, I am. Up until 1952, hysteria was one of the most commonly diagnosed illnesses among women. The medical treatment was hysterical paroxysm.

  Court Reporter : Could the witness spell that?

  John Munch : O-R-G-A-S-M.

• Capt. Donald Cragen : Well, while you wait take her photo around, see if you can find a co-worker who knew her, all right. Munch, Cassidy! You available?

  John Munch : To do with as you will, after court.

  Capt. Donald Cragen : Oh, right, Doctor Buzzjoy.

  Det. Monique Jefferies : Oh, that's an open and shut case, Munch, try not to screw it up with your insane rambling.

  [She walks away, Munch continues to stare at her] 

  Det. Monique Jefferies : And stop looking at my ass.

• Det. Monique Jefferies : So you're saying *all* women are whores?

  Det. John Munch : Don't be ridiculous. I don't know *all* the women in the world.