Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (TV Series)

Perfect (2003)

Christopher Meloni: Detective Elliot Stabler

Quotes 

• Ed Tucker : [When a teenage girl is found deceased at the crime scene]  We think the perp shot her.

  Elliot Stabler : No, you think the cops accidentally shot her, and you're trying to pull us into your own mess by calling it an SVU case.

  Ed Tucker : This girl was tortured and we have no idea who she is. You want her parents to see her face in the morning news?

  Elliot Stabler : That's your problem, not ours.

  [he and Olivia begin to walk off] 

  Ed Tucker : Come on, SVU knows how to protect victims and deal with families.

  Elliot Stabler : You mean you want us to keep this under wraps.

  Ed Tucker : We want this to look clean from the beginning, so I'm asking for a favor.

  Olivia Benson : All the times that you people at IAB jammed us up and now you want to play nice? You've got a set of balls on you asking us for anything.

  Elliot Stabler : If we find out that a cop shot that girl, you expect us to keep it quiet?

  Ed Tucker : I expect you to do your job. However this turns out, it turns out. You don't want to do it for me, fine. Do it for her.

• Dr. George Huang : [about Dr. Lang]  He's a narcissistic bastard and he's calling all the shots. You saw the way his lawyer deferred to him.

  Olivia Benson : I can understand a 14-year-old being taken in by Lang, but not a smart, educated woman like Quentin.

  Dr. George Huang : Jim Jones got hundreds of his disciples to drink poisoned Kool-Aid because he had a charismatic personality. Lang uses his to get people like Quentin and Haggerty to love and obey him.

  Elliot Stabler : Those teenage girls couldn't be more vulnerable. They're not that attractive. Probably got bad grades in school. They're just social outcasts.

  Olivia Benson : So this cult is a place for them to fit in.

  Dr. George Huang : And inundate them with approval and affection. It's called love bombing: "You're perfect the way you are."

  Olivia Benson : Right, which is what every teenage girl wants to hear.

• Ms. Kinderski : I don't like your insinuation, Detective.

  Elliot Stabler : I don't like liars, Miss Kinderski.

• Elliot Stabler : Kind of strange Cragen calling us in on an officer-involved shooting.

  Olivia Benson : Maybe not. Look who's over there.

  Elliot Stabler : [the detectives see Tucker from IAB at the crime scene]  Swell.

• Dr. Garrett Lang : [to Stabler]  You're what, early 40s, right, Detective?

  Elliot Stabler : Late 30s, why?

  Dr. Garrett Lang : Do you ever feel that your stamina's declining? That you don't have the energy you used to or that you've lost your edge?

  Elliot Stabler : No, but let's say that I was.

  Dr. Garrett Lang : Well, then, I would put you on a course of human growth hormone and testosterone therapy. I guarantee you'd be a new man in the squad room, not to mention the bedroom.

• Dr. Melinda Warner : [about Samantha Tassler's autopsy]  When a woman goes through her menstrual cycle, one, maybe two eggs are released, leaving the follicles where the eggs came from empty.

  Olivia Benson : And something was wrong with Samantha's ovaries?

  Dr. Melinda Warner : She had 12 visibly involuted follicles. That means 12 eggs all released at the same time. I've never seen that in a 14-year-old.

  Elliot Stabler : But I thought women were most fertile in their teenage years.

  Dr. Melinda Warner : Usually this only happens when the ovaries are hyperstimulated by hormones, like for in-vitro fertilization.

  Olivia Benson : So assuming that she even wanted to, why does a 14-year-old girl need help getting pregnant?

  Dr. Melinda Warner : I don't know, but whatever the reason, it worked. Samantha was carrying an 8-week-old fetus.

• Olivia Benson : [to Dr. Lang]  What about Samantha Tassler undergoing in vitro fertilization, which you happen to perform? Are we wrong about that, too?

  Dr. Garrett Lang : Any OB-GYN who's a fertility specialist could have done that.

  Elliot Stabler : Yeah, but she and the other girls weren't wearing any other fertility specialist's infinity necklace and you've got Miss Haggerty here who's got that symbol tattooed on her wrist.

  Dr. Garrett Lang : Any questions from the FBI, Agent Huang?

  Dr. George Huang : You enjoy this, don't you, Dr. Lang?

  Dr. Garrett Lang : I enjoy helping those girls thrive and realize their full potential. Because of you people, we may have to close down the foundation.

  [turns to Quentin] 

  Dr. Garrett Lang : Joan?

  Joan Quentin : Unless you're going to arrest me or either of my clients, we're through. Or my next call is to the Internal Affairs Bureau for harassment.

• Jessica Morse : [to Stabler]  Mrs. Haggerty is the most wonderful person I ever met. She and the other girls accepted me for who I am, and not who they thought I should be.

  Elliot Stabler : That's nice. And how about Dr. Lang? Am I wrong about him?

  Jessica Morse : He is a great man. He's going to save the world.

  Elliot Stabler : Yeah? How's he gonna do that?

  Jessica Morse : Well, the ozone layer is disappearing...

  Elliot Stabler : Yeah?

  Jessica Morse : And the ultraviolet rays will make everybody sterile, so the only way our species will survive is by cloning living cells.

  Elliot Stabler : Jessica, are you pregnant?

  Jessica Morse : Yes. He chose me to be one of the mothers of the future.

• Dr. Garrett Lang : Stabler. That's Irish Catholic, right?

  Elliot Stabler : Hey, pal, this ain't about me, it's about you.

  Dr. Garrett Lang : You believe a virgin gave birth. You think that was a very popular theory in Jesus' time?

  Elliot Stabler : What I believe has got nothing to do with your case.

• Paula Haggerty : [to Jessica]  You're not mad at me?

  Jessica Morse : No. They told me all about your little girl. I love my parents, but I still love you, too.

  [she and Mrs. Haggerty hug each other] 

  Elliot Stabler : [to Mrs. Haggerty]  All Lang has done is manipulated your pain. He's used you to help him experiment on girls who love you. They trust you. You're the only one who can stop him.

• Elliot Stabler : [to Dr. Warner]  Now what about Samantha's fetus? I mean, you're not going to tell us that that's the clone of some family's dead child, are you?

  Dr. Melinda Warner : Until someone proves otherwise, that's science fiction.