- Samantha Johnstone: Oh, would you like to join me?
- Joyce Barnaby: Oh yes, all right.
- Samantha Johnstone: I'm so pleased to meet you. I don't know what's happened to the others.
- [pause]
- Samantha Johnstone: Barman, two large whiskeys, please. What are you going to have?
- DCI Tom Barnaby: Oh, Lothlorian. That's "Lord of the Rings, " eh?
- Sergeant Gavin Troy: Huh?
- DCI Tom Barnaby: J. R. Tolkien.
- Sergeant Gavin Troy: Oh, I've never read it. I started "The Hobbit" once.
- DCI Tom Barnaby: And?
- Sergeant Gavin Troy: Well, it's all dwarfs and fairies. I like books that are a bit more - you know.
- DCI Tom Barnaby: I can imagine.
- Sergeant Gavin Troy: You're Peter Drinkwater?
- Peter Drinkwater: And you're police, aren't you?
- Sergeant Gavin Troy: Detective Sergeant Troy, Causton CID. This is Detective Chief Inspector Barnaby.
- Peter Drinkwater: It's the same smell. You can always tell.
- Cully Barnaby: Why don't you tell her?
- DCI Tom Barnaby: What?
- Cully Barnaby: Well, Mom, about the murder.
- DCI Tom Barnaby: Ah, well, I don't really know. It, uh, didn't seem to be fair somehow.
- Cully Barnaby: To her or the village?
- DCI Tom Barnaby: Both.
- Cully Barnaby: I don't see how you can be a perfect village when you've got a homicidal maniac running around with a pitchfork.
- DCI Tom Barnaby: Ah, maybe that's my point. I didn't want to influence her judgment.
- [first lines]
- Annabel Weston: I don't want you to go! Why do you have to go?
- Ruth Weston: We talked about this. It's Mommy and Daddy's anniversary.
- Annabel Weston: I don't care! I don't want you to go!
- Michael Weston: We'll be home later. Don't you want us to have a good time?
- Annabel Weston: No!
- [last lines]
- DCI Tom Barnaby: You still misled me.
- Joyce Barnaby: Tom!
- DCI Tom Barnaby: I relied on you, Joyce.
- Joyce Barnaby: Well, nobody's perfect.
- DCI Tom Barnaby: It's probably just as well.
- Rosemary Furman: Hello Frank. I haven't seen you since...
- Frank Mannion: Since you fired me, Rosemary.
- Rosemary Furman: Oh, yes.
- [sniffles]
- Rosemary Furman: Well, you've got that television program now.
- Frank Mannion: Mm. And doing very nicely, thank you very much.
- Rosemary Furman: Yes. I suppose it allows you to pursue your interest in pansies.
- Frank Mannion: Mm.
- Laura Brierly: If you don't mind removing your hand from that dog's ass, Gordon darling, it's time to go.