The Muppet Show (TV Series)

Gilda Radner (1978)

Jim Henson: Kermit the Frog, Rowlf, Muppet Newsman, Waldorf, Muppaphones

Quotes 

• Statler : Why did they want the igloo?

  Waldorf : I don't know. Maybe somebody must have broken their ig.

• Gilda Radner : A seven-foot tall talking carrot?

  The Carrot : Watch it, lady. I'm a star. I sang the hit song from Cole.

  Kermit the Frog : Cole? Cole Porter?

  Gilda Radner : Cole slaw. They paid him a huge celery.

  The Carrot : Now she's stealing my jokes.

• Dr. Bunsen Honeydew : There. I have just placed on Gilda's forehead a single, teensy, weensy drop of Muppet's new super adhesive. Now we'll wait a moment for it to get tacky.

  Statler : What are we waiting for?

  Waldorf : For it to get tacky.

  Statler : Another first for this show.

  Waldorf : How's that?

  Statler : It's the first time we've had to wait for it to get tacky.

• Waldorf : Well, that must be the glue, all right.

  Statler : Well, what glue is that?

  Waldorf : The one they mend the ig with.

• Statler : Good night!

  Waldorf : So long!

  [they suddenly notice that their hands are stuck to the railings of their box seats] 

  Statler , Waldorf : Oh, no!

  [struggle to get unstuck] 

• Kermit the Frog : Piggy, not right now, I'm stuck on the phone. Literally.

• [Piggy is still stuck to Kermit, but is more affectionate than she was earlier] 

  Miss Piggy : Oh, Kermie-poo.

  Kermit the Frog : Piggy, you're putting all your weight on me.

  Miss Piggy : Mm-hm. Maybe we shall be stuck like this forever.

  Kermit the Frog : I don't know how long I can go on supporting you.

  Miss Piggy : [not realizing that Kermit is being literal]  Well, if you think I'm gonna go out and work...