The Muppet Show (TV Series)

Linda Lavin (1979)

Richard Hunt: Scooter, Wayne, Statler, Janice, Cow

Quotes 

• Nurse Janice : Dr. Bob, I haven't had a line in five minutes!

• Waldorf : How 'bout when you were sixty-three?

  Statler : Oh, that was a year!

  Waldorf : Hmm?

  Statler : Yeah.

  Waldorf : I broke my hip.

  Statler : Huh?

  Waldorf : Got to flirt with the nurse all year!

  [both laugh] 

  Statler : Yeah, well, my third wife left me. Ah, what a terrific year!

  [both laugh] 

  Statler : Yeah, w-what about when you were seventy-four?

  Waldorf : Nah. That was the year my rheumatism came back.

  Statler : Yeah, so did my third wife.

  [both laugh] 

  Waldorf : What a terrible year.

  Statler : Oh, indeed, yeah.