- Baydool: There's always food on the table.
- Crow T. Robot: And food in my beard.
- Baydool: Would you like some food?
- Tom Servo: I would, but what's that crap you're holding up?
- [Baydool comes out holding a chamber pot]
- Pearl Forrester: Eww, wizard wiz!
- Crow T. Robot: He drained the wizard!
- Baydool: All is well.
- Tom Servo: Oh yeah, I got bought by a beard-wearing psycho, I had half a can of pee thrown at me, yeah, things are great.
- Pearl Forrester: Okay, Nelson, time for your semi-annual check-up. So...
- [readies clipboard]
- Pearl Forrester: How are you feeling these days?
- Mike Nelson: Doing very well these days, Pearl. Thank you.
- Pearl Forrester: No physical pain anywhere? No mental anguish? No vague feelings of unease? Poor sleep? Crying jags, hives, corns?
- Mike Nelson: No. Well, I was a bit upset a few days ago when I lost some shiny bottle-caps that I quite liked, but, I found 'em and ever since it's been damn good times. I'm feeling very very happy and I never felt healthier. I have a good life. Thank you!
- Pearl Forrester: *Why?* What is *wrong* with you? I work my fingers to the bone trying to make you miserable and you have the insensitivity to tell me you're *happy?*
- Brain Guy: You know, Pearl, it might behoove you to reevaluate the experiment itself. As a wise old Observer once said, to constantly repeat the same action and expect a variant reaction is surely a sign of madness.
- [Pearl punches him in the face]
- Pearl Forrester: Then why do you keep mouthing off to me? You get the same reaction every time.
- Tom Servo: Hey, what happened to Crow there?
- Mike Nelson: Oh he went outside to check the ships gutters, the ratio kicked up and he got caught in a freak hailstorm.
- Tom Servo: Sure is the season for 'em, huh?
- Mike Nelson: Yeah, about three grand in hail damage, uh, it's gonna be about three weeks in the shop, but Gyps gave me a loaner Crow.
- [smoking rattling loaner Crow shows up]
- Tom Servo: Cool. Hey, it's that old AMC Crow that Gypsy's been tinkering with for years.
- Loaner Crow: Hey guys, are there things that are happening?
- Tom Servo: He must be running rich.
- Mike Nelson: Yeah, well, I'll flip his air filter cover over and uh, he should be fine.
- Tom Servo: Check it out, he's got a killer radio!
- Mike Nelson: Oh wow, cool.
- [turns on radio]
- Loaner Crow: Later we'll take stuff and do it, right?
- Outlaw: [muffled] There's to be no talking by Prince Jaamteer's command.
- Crow T. Robot: Well, tell Prince Jumpjugs I'm sorry.
- Leonardo: What are you doing?
- Tom Servo: Trying to obey Prince Jumpjugs.
- Tee: When in doubt, rest.
- Crow T. Robot: You are full of crap beyond your years, kid.
- Crow T. Robot: [Lord Vultair is ordering the arrest of Baydool] David Warner, you are under arrest by order of David Warner!
- Baydool: My name is Baydool.
- Crow T. Robot: No, wait, that's my intestinal condition.
- Baydool: Can you say "Baydool"?
- Pearl Forrester: Let me try. "Get bent." No, I guess I can't.
- Leonardo: Come on, Tee. Besides being a pretty good artist, I'm *great* with maps, so how about it?
- Mike Nelson: How great can you really be at *maps*?
- Crow T. Robot: It's like being good at eating cereal.