Roseanne (TV Series)

Darlene Fades to Black (1991)

Sara Gilbert: Darlene Conner

Quotes 

• Darlene : Please, Mom, I don't want you to help me, I just want you to leave me alone... Please.

• Roseanne : [after yelling at Dan for being sexist, then arguing with Becky. Becky runs up the stairs, so Roseanne turns to Darlene]  And you... What is it with you? All you do is just lay around that couch, staring at that stupid TV, one dumb rerun after another.

  Darlene : [to herself]  And I do it as well as any man.

• Darlene : [Roseanne wants to know what Darlene's friend called about]  She wanted to do something; I didn't feel like it.

  Roseanne : Yeah, well, so what are you going to do?

  Darlene : Nothing.

  Roseanne : That's what you did last weekend!

  Darlene : Yeah, well I'm not finished.

• Roseanne : [Roseanne is trying to get Darlene off the couch by offering her a charge card to go buy some clothes with]  Here's the card, just do it.

  Darlene : What should I buy?

  Roseanne : I don't know. Go, try to find something to blend in with the couch.

  Becky : [not believing her ears]  Oh, so that's the way it works around here? You lie around like a hairball and you get free clothes? Well, maybe if I lapse into a coma, I'll get that car.

• Roseanne : It just seems that when you had basketball...

  Darlene : [sighs and gets up]  Basketball, again with basketball.

  Roseanne : Hold on, sit down, I'm not telling you to play basketball. I think it's the dumbest sport ever invented and I spent all 4 years of high school acting like I had cramps so's I wouldn't have to play it. But it just seemed that when you had basketball, you cared about something. What do you care about now?

  Darlene : What I care about is being left alone.

• Roseanne : Are you doing drugs, Darlene?

  Darlene : No.

  Roseanne : Would you tell me if you were?

  Darlene : If I was doing drugs, no I wouldn't tell you, but since I'm not doing them, the answer's no.

  Roseanne : Why should I believe that?

  Darlene : Because I'm saying it. You can search my room, give me a blood test, whatever.