Scrubs (TV Series)
My Lucky Charm (2005)
John C. McGinley: Dr. Perry Cox
Quotes
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Dr. Perry Cox : What... what did you do around the apartment while I was gone?
Jordan Sullivan : Oh! I turned your little office into my pajama closet, I threw out everything in the refrigerator that had the word "jerky" or "whiz" on it, I got rid of all your clothes that make you look like you're 20 years old. Don't worry, I saved your hockey jerseys, although I did move them into my new pajama closet. And for some reason none of the remotes work anymore. And why are you limping?
Dr. Perry Cox : Fishing. I'm limping from fishing.
Dr. Bob Kelso : I know that limp!
Dr. Perry Cox : No, Bob... Bob, no...
Dr. Bob Kelso : You just got a vasectomy! I had mine done back in '68; ironically that was the same year that Enid discovered pasta and I discovered I'm not attracted to enormous women.
Dr. Perry Cox : I didn't just get a vasectomy...
Dr. Bob Kelso : Come on, soldier... if I have to force you to drop your pants, I will.
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Dr. Elliot Reid : Carla, I'm so bummed. I can't go see the Chamber Orchestra tonight, I totally forgot I have my Cantonese class. And I would totally call and cancel but the only thing I know how to say is "I'm allergic to peanuts."
Nurse Carla Espinosa : Oh, Elliot, I was really looking forward to this.
The Janitor : Really? About five seconds ago you were all giddy about going home and taking a bath tonight.
Nurse Carla Espinosa : Why would you do that to me?
The Janitor : New thing. I'm busting chops.
Nurse Carla Espinosa : [laughs defensively]
Dr. Elliot Reid : So, you just forgot we even had plans?
Nurse Carla Espinosa : What's the big deal? You were flaking on them anyway.
Dr. Elliot Reid : I wasn't. I have my Cantonese class.
The Janitor : But do you? Do you really?
[Elliot makes a "What are you doing" face - Janitor shrugs]
The Janitor : Busting chops.
Dr. Elliot Reid : Fine! Well at least I remembered the plans well enough to flake on them!
[storms off down a corridor]
Nurse Carla Espinosa : [shouting after her] Oh yeah? Well if I knew you were gonna flake on them, I would never have made plans to forget in the first place, because you...
Dr. Perry Cox : [has just walked in from the corridor Elliot left down] She's gone, Carla. It's over.
Nurse Carla Espinosa : Where the hell have you been for the last few days?
Dr. Perry Cox : Deep sea fishing.
Nurse Carla Espinosa : You hate fishing.
Dr. Perry Cox : Went with my buddies.
Nurse Carla Espinosa : You don't have any buddies.
Dr. Perry Cox : Oh yeah? Well we landed a 200 pound white marlin off the coast of San Diego.
The Janitor : Interesting, because that's about 3,000 miles from the natural habitat of the white marlin. Hmm, well perhaps it hopped a train from Cape Cod!
Dr. Perry Cox : Why?
The Janitor : I'm busting chops today. You can ask anybody.
Nurse Carla Espinosa : It's true.
The Janitor : See?
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Dr. Perry Cox : Jordan, let me talk for a second. I've been trained for many years to take any emotion I feel, push it down, and then let it out by drinking way too much and by yelling at the football players on my TV screen. And I... I really thought I hit the jackpot when I finally met a woman who was as disturbed and closed-off as I am.
Jordan Sullivan : [Touched] Thank you.
Dr. Perry Cox : You're welcome. Still, now I want more. I--I really do. I want to talk about things. Not--not everything. Not everything. I definitely, definitely don't want to talk about everything. For instance I don't need to know when you beat up a woman in the park because her purse is the same color as yours; but things that matter, things that are important to us as a--as a family. And I know... I know that there are guys who bring flowers and that there are guys who write love songs. But, Jordan, I'm a guy sitting in front of you here with a twice operated-on penis that says "I want to be a couple that communicates more openly."