Seinfeld (TV Series)
The Chinese Woman (1994)
Julia Louis-Dreyfus: Elaine Benes
Photos
Quotes
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Jerry Seinfeld : Well, it looks like you've adjusted to the boxers.
Kramer : Well, I wouldn't go as far as that.
Jerry Seinfeld : You went back to the Jockeys?
Kramer : Wrong again.
Jerry Seinfeld : [realizing] Oh, no.
Elaine Benes : What? What?
Jerry Seinfeld : Don't you see what's goin' on here? No boxers, no Jockeys...
[Elaine backs away from Kramer, disgusted]
Jerry Seinfeld : The only thing between him and us is a thin layer of gabardine... Kramer, say it isn't so.
Kramer : Oh, it be so. I'm out there, Jerry, and I'm lovin' every minute of it.
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Jerry Seinfeld : Really? You never slipped one past the goalie in all these years? Boy, I'm surprised, you've slept with a lot of women.
Kramer : A lot! You think maybe I'm... depleted?
Jerry Seinfeld : Well I'm sure you're not totally depleted.
Kramer : Yeah, but what if I am? I'm the last male Kramer! We're facing extinction
Jerry Seinfeld : So go to a fertility clinic, have your sperm count checked.
Kramer : Yeah, but then I'd have to... well, you know... into a cup in the middle of the day?
Elaine Benes : Does that conflict with your regular schedule?
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Jerry Seinfeld : What are you doin' to this woman?, This is the second relationship you've ruined for her in a few weeks
Elaine Benes : I know
Jerry Seinfeld : First you ruin her relationship with the High Talker
Elaine Benes : Well, Jer, I got confused. They sound exactly the same
Jerry Seinfeld : So she breaks up with him, somehow picks up the pieces of her life, miraculously meets a new guy and you bust that up and then just as they're reconciling, you announce to the world he's boring
Elaine Benes : [apologetically] I didn't know she'd take it so seriously
Jerry Seinfeld : Well, apparently you have a tremendous influence over this woman, anything you say she does!
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Elaine Benes : [discussing George's parents] Divorce? That's really too bad.
Jerry Seinfeld : Yeah. You know it's a shame his parents didn't get divorced 30 years ago. He *could* have been normal.
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Jerry Seinfeld : I love Chinese women.
Elaine Benes : Isn't that a little racist?
Jerry Seinfeld : If I like their race, how can that be racist?