South Park (TV Series)

Rainforest Shmainforest (1999)

Trey Parker: Stan Marsh, Eric Cartman, G.G.W.K. Boy, Mr. Mackey, Prostitute #2, Pre-Recorded Choir Singer, Bob, Rainforest Show Host, Man in Crowd, Woman in Crowd

Photos 

Quotes 

• [driving through San Jose, Costa Rica] 

  Eric Cartman : Oh my God, it smells like ass out here.

  Miss Stevens : All right, that does it. Eric Cartman, you respect other cultures this instant.

  Eric Cartman : I wasn't saying anything about their culture, I was just saying their city smells like ass.

  Miss Stevens : You may think that making fun of third-world countries is funny but let me...

  Eric Cartman : I don't think it's funny. This place is overcrowded, smelly and poor. That's not funny, that sucks.

• Eric Cartman : Bad, bad monkey!

  [Smacks monkey on the head] 

  Miss Stevens : Eric! What the hell are you doing?

  Eric Cartman : I'm asserting myself, its tough love. Just like my Mr. Kitty. When he's bad I say 'That's a bad Mr. Kitty, and I smack him on the head'.

  Tour Guide : And here is a three-toed sloth.

  Eric Cartman : It's bad, that's a bad three-toed sloth.

  [Smacks sloth on the head] 

  Miss Stevens : Eric! For God's sake knock it off!

  Eric Cartman : Respect my authoritah!

  [Throws stick at the sloth] 

• Eric Cartman : Let me try. Let me try. We are from America. America. We are lost and very hungry. Necesito burritos!

  Stan Marsh : I don't want a burrito. I want a taco. Supreme.

  Eric Cartman : Y taco.

  Kyle Broflovski : I want two tostados and mild sauce.

  Eric Cartman : Dos tostados y, y enchiritos!

  Miss Stevens : Boys, please. Not every Spanish person eats tacos and burritos. That's a stereotype!

• Mr. Mackey : [Lecturing Craig in his office]  I am tired of seeing you here in my office, young man. You get sent here every day, Craig.

  Craig : I know.

  Mr. Mackey : Why can't you behave?

  Craig : I don't know.

  Mr. Mackey : What do you have to say for yourself?

  [Craig is silent] 

  Mr. Mackey : Well, I'll tell you what, young man. You're gonna be held back a grade if you can't...

  [Craig gives Mr. Mackey the finger] 

  Mr. Mackey : Did you just flip me off?

  Craig : No.

  Mr. Mackey : Yes, you did! You just flipped me the bird! This is exactly what I'm talking about! If you don't shape up, m'kay, and get your head straight-

  [Craig does it again] 

  Mr. Mackey : There! You just flipped me off again!

  Craig : No, I didn't.

  Mr. Mackey : Yes, you did! And until you stop flipping people off, you can just go back to the waiting room, m'kay? Next!

  [Craig hops off the chair as the door opens. The boys enter] 

  Mr. Mackey : Well, well, well, if it isn't Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Eric.

  Kyle Broflovski : Hi, Craig.

  Eric Cartman : Hey, don't flip me off, you son of a bitch!

  Mr. Mackey : Sit down, boys. Now, let's see. What did Mr. Garrison send you in here for?

  [Reading the letter] 

  Mr. Mackey : "The boys were being rude while a choir teacher was giving some stupid presentation..."

  Stan Marsh : It's just some dumb activist kids' choir thing.

  Mr. Mackey : Uh, young man, Getting Gay With Kids is not dumb, m'kay?

• Miss Stevens : All right, that does it! Goddamn stupid-ass rainforest! This place fucking sucks! I was wrong. Fuck the rainforest! I fucking hate it! I fucking hate it!

  Stan Marsh : Oh, now she figures it out.

• Miss Stevens : So, if anyone is interested in seeing the rainforest and joining our choir, I'll leave information packets up front.

  Eric Cartman : Oh, that's good. we need some more toilet paper.